Caught in the Middle (Alpha vs Beta)

Back Downs and Breakdowns

Chapter 15

 Back Downs and Breakdowns

"You can't just keep ignoring me forever, you know?" Logan said, his hands firmly grasping the steering wheel of my car. I was in no mood to drive, nor talk to him for that matter. I kept my silence in tact, noticing that it was already having an effect on him as he gripped the wheel even harder and nervously chewed on the inside of his cheek.

"I don't get why you're so angry!" he growled, looking at me. I jumped slightly at his sudden outburst but regained my composure.

"Oh, you don't? You know I care about Sean! You knew that I wanted you to stay home! You knew that this was the last thing I wanted! Yet you completely ignore all of my wishes and do what the hell you please and you're yelling at me for ignoring you? You're such a hypocrite!" I yelled back. There was no way that I was going to let his yelling get to me. If this relationship was going to work, he needed to work on his temper and fast. Now it was his turn to remain silent. He shook his head and looked back to the road.

"You're an Alpha. You're supposed to be the bigger and better person around here, setting an example for the rest of us, yet you accept a match which you'll obviously win! You're going to  disgrace Sean either because he steps down or because you'll beat the crap out of him! Violence never solved anything! There's nothing great or noble about that," I said quietly, wiping a stray tear off from my face. I didn't want harsh arguements over me, let alone a fight to the death. Logan licked his lips and looked at me with sad eyes.

"You're right. I'm sorry ," he said hoarsely. 

"Then why'd you do it?" I replied, avoiding his gaze.

"Because...because I felt threatened, okay?"

"Why?"

"Why do you think, Ash? You're obviously still in love with the guy! It was clear as day in your eyes as you were talking to him and he realized it too! Don't think for a second that he won't use the fact that you're a good person against you! He knows that you'll feel sorry for him! And that's why I was threatened, I just found you and I'm not about to let someone take you away from me, not now, not ever," I let his words sink in and thinking about it, he was right too. I did feel sorry for Sean and guilty  about this whole thing. Thinking of how I hanged out with Logan while Sean was away made me feel dirty and tainted. "I'll call the fight off if you want," he said simply. I shook my head and he looked at me, obviously surprised.

"You understood why I don't want this fight, you did your part. If you back off, it'll only give Sean the impression that you're vulnerable and willing to step down. He'll only use that against you, saying that you're a coward. All I have to do is talk Sean out of it, that way, no one loses their reputation,"

"I don't care about my reputation if whatever it is makes you happy," he said. I smiled at him.

"Your pack might though, no one wants a wimpy Alpha," I laughed and nudged his shoulder. He chuckled and shook his head. The laughter died down as soon as I remembered the whole situation.

"So...what are you going to do to try to get Sean to back down?"

"Try and talk to him?"

"No offence, Ash. But that didn't go so well the first time," he replied.

"Well, he found out in a second and maybe it was too much to take in in a short while. He might be a little more open to the idea now,"

"I'm not going to disbelieve you, but I highly doubt that that's going to happen. Just know that I support you but if he keeps coming at us, I won't hesitate to put him back in his place. There's no way I'm about to let him ruin this, or get my pack to think I'm a pushover. That would cause chaos," I nodded, understanding his point. If Logan, the Alpha would sit around while someone keeps trying to take his mate, everyone will think that he's easy to get around. I wasn't sure about some things though, like why Logan hadn't even hinted on us mating yet. I heard that normal werewolves would mate in the first few days of knowing each other, let alone an Alpha. This defiantly raised questions in my head but I wasn't sure if I should ask about it because I wasn't sure if I myself, was ready for it in the first place.

"I don't like the fact that if you go you'll be around him, all by yourself,"

"He won't hurt me," I replied, skeptically. Did he actually think Sean would do something like that?

"I know that,"

"Then, you don't trust me?"

"Of course I do, it's him I'm having trust issues with,"

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I let out a nervous sigh and knocked on Sean's door. I recited what I wanted to say to him in my head before he opened the door, crossed his arms across his broad chest and leaned against the door frame.

"Ashley," he said quietly, nodding in my direction.

"Hey, um...I'm not sure how to say this. I'm sure you must be mad at me and..."

"Mad? Are you kidding me? I'm furious!"

"You've got to understand that I had we had nothing to do with this! Even I know that and I barely know anything about werewolf history!"

"It's hard to understand it, Ash! I thought....never mind. What I don't understand though is how you stay with him,"

"What do you mean?" I asked confused...wasn't it obvious?

"You haven't mated yet. It's pretty obvious," I blushed slightly as he mentioned that and mentally face palmed myself. This wasn't the right time.

"He marked me,"

"Oh I know, that's still not gonna stop me though. You know you're not happy with him! Just come with me! We can run away together, become rogues I don't care," as he ranted on and on, I felt tears slip down my face. This wasn't the Sean I knew.

"Sean, please! Don't make this harder than it already is for me! I won't run away with you that's insane! How do you think Logan would react, huh? Send a bunch of pissed of werewolves to find us and rip you apart? You need to forget about me! And don't think that this is only hard on you, Sean. I love you but I know that I can't be with you and you know the same. Somewhere out there, there's your mate just waiting to be found. " He just shook his head and looked at the ground. 

"You always were the stronger one," he said, his eyes clouding. He turned his back to me and slammed the door while I just stood there, looking at where his body once was. Tears were flowing freely down my face at that point and little did I know that was just the beginning of something much bigger which was yet to come.