love within the silence

twenty-nine

Jughead's POV:
I was pacing the porch, avoiding the eye contact with the man I once called my best friend. I had no words and I was trying my best not to shout at everyone around. I ran my hands over my face and I said 'I can't deal with this' I looked at Veronica and Charlie, I could see the sad faces they had and I walked inside and upstairs to find ally.

She was playing with Archie and Jelly when I walked in, when she saw me she smiled and ran over to the doorway where I was standing. I picked her up and she said 'I tired dada' I kissed her head and said 'I know, shall we head home?' She nodded before saying 'no more talking, can take them out please?' I smiled and nodded, I put her on the floor and gently took out her hearing aids. Say goodnight to uncle Archie and auntie jelly she nodded and then signed night night she hugged them both before coming back over to me. We walked downstairs and I grabbed ally's box to put away her hearing aids, I placed her bag over my shoulder before walking towards the door to see Veronica and Charlie talking.

Charlie stood when I walked out but I avoided eye contact and focused on ally. She looked at me and I signed say goodnight to auntie Veronica she climbed onto Veronica and hugged her tightly. As ally was saying her goodbyes Charlie said 'jug, can we talk? Please?' I clenched my jaw and I looked at him, I said 'there's nothing to talk about, welcome back I guess' he sighed and I could see the hurt in his face 'I want a chance to explain' I looked at him and I said 'explain what? Like I said we have nothing to talk about, I don't know you anymore and you certainly don't know me. I'd like to keep it that way' he opened his mouth to talk when Veronica stood up holding ally 'jug, listen to me. Your going through a lot right now, mum and jelly just got back, your girlfriends in hospital. Don't make a decision like that right now, you owe him every right to explain. He's your best friend for gods sake' I laughed slightly while taking ally from her arms, 'I owe him nothing. I get what happened 5 years ago was shitty and probably the worst time of his life but I mourned the loss of my best friend, because he died. I visited his grave everyday for a year until it drove me crazy, I blocked out everyone who ever cared for me because i didn't want to lose them the same way. So no, I don't owe him anything because the man who I called my best friend, sorry, no. My brother. He's 6 feet under and I'd like him to stay there' ally's hand rose to my face once I had finished talking and she signed daddy sad? I shook my head and I said back I'm fine baby, let's go home she nodded her head before resting it on my shoulder and waving to Veronica who I was leaving completely shocked behind.

When we arrived home, I got ally something quick for her dinner and then she got changed into her pyjamas. We were lying in mine and bettys bed, I was signing her a story and once I was finished she cuddled up into my chest and said daddy, who was that man at auntie Veronicas? I smiled slightly and said he was my friend a long, long time ago she nodded and said he make you sad I looked at her and brushed the hair from her face, a little bit but I'm happy now she smiled and said i love you dada I kissed her forehead and said I love you too princess, now time for sleep. She cuddled up into my chest and I ran her hair through my fingers hoping to soothe her and fall asleep faster.

I didn't know when I had fallen asleep as all I remember was waking up the next morning to my phone ringing. Ally was still asleep next to me when I picked up my phone, I didn't look who it was before answering.

Veronica: jug?
Jughead: what?
Veronica: are you okay?
Jughead: peachy
Veronica: stop, stop being a dick about this
Jughead: I'm not, I've handled this situation perfectly
Veronica: he's sorry, can you just give Charlie a chance to explain
Jughead: explain what? The fact that he's been alive this whole time, that he didn't even give me the slightest indication he was alive. That's all I would have needed, I don't ask for much. It would have been nice to have had confirmation to whether or not my best friend was dead or not! I drove myself crazy, you watched me have breakdown after breakdown. Veronica your the one who drove me to the hospital when you found me collapsed on the floor with an empty bottle of pills next to my body and your asking me to talk to him. Your the one who spoke to my girlfriend at three o'clock in the morning when I thought I had fucked it all up by keeping my arrest record from her. I have a family and I was happy, I need time to accept that I nearly ended everything over someone who was alive all this time
Veronica: I know jug, I know but it wasn't that simple. He was still at risk of being caught, he couldn't say anything or tell anyone, you have to understand that. He wants his family back jug, us of all people know what that feels like
Jughead: Veronica, I have stuff to do. I need to pick up Betty, I need to sort out business at the bar not to mention the fact that mum is sitting downstairs wanting to talk to you but you are point blank refusing. So when you man up and talk to mum, I'll face Charlie. But until then I'm busy trying to get on with my life