tell me

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Since I've got a boyfriend my dear best friend started getting distant from me.
We've barely talked this month. I mostly don't see him.
We don't even text like we used to.
We don't even hangout anymore. I'm always with my boyfriend and he was with his girlfriend also.
It always felt weird to not have him around .

So today I decided to take a break from overthinking.
It's been almost 3 days since I broke up with my boyfriend.
I'm so broken and hurted .
I'm a mess. My make up is a mess. My hair is a mess.
I decided I'd take a shower and get my mind off the thinking .
After I took a shower I put on some easy make up. Like not to much. Not even a little highlight just you know.

I wore some leggings and a hoodie. I choosed a black hoodie. And when I wore it....i recognized it was Johnny's. His scent was breathtaking.
I remember he gave me that hoodie in a winter day hangout then when I wanted to give it back he told me to keep it. So I did.

He was my best friend but I always had felt something more .

I headed out and off to the Starbucks.
I got my favourite drink and drove to the city and enjoy a little.

After I got back home I felt better.
I wouldn't let a guy break me that easy.
Much as I wanted to call someone to hangout or have a sleepover i ratcheted to stay home.
My parents were out of town for a job.
So I was home alone.

Dark.

Ding dong the bell rang and I was scared to open the door.
I took a knife (Lmfao pretend) and headed to the door.
With my hands shaking and my gun *cough cough*knife* I opened the door slowly only taken back by a scream.
"Ahhhhh.....omg are you insane?" A voice screamed.

"J-Johnny?" I said with my voice cracking.
"Hi y/n the criminal" he said while pouting.
"Funny"
"Won't you let me in?" Embarrassed me.
"Oh sorry come in" I said with my face so lighted up when I saw him.

"I heard that you broke up with your boyfriend is that right?" He said.
"Yes almost 3 days ago..." I said almost crying. He got up and sat next to me. Our knees touching. He wrapped his arms around me as I started crying.

"Shhh....don't cry y/n he isn't worth it..."
He said kissing my forehead.
"You're right he isn't worth it. But I just...I loved him...and turns out he didn't even love me a little...life's not fair"
I said as he listened to every word I spoke.

"Let's change the topic" felt better tho
"And oh God I missed you...I missed you so much y/n..."
"I missed you too John...so much"
Pure silence. We decided to watch a movie.
His arms around me. Me smelling his cologne. Hearing his heart beat.
Nothing feels better than this.

Then after an hour after the movie ended he decided to speak up.
"Can I sleep here tonight?"
"Uh-oh yea yes sure"

I thought he was going to sleep in the guests bedroom as usual but turned out he came after me in my room.

"Can I sleep with you?....please?"
"Sure..." I said so confused .

After I finished my things I got to bed.
We both layed across each other. Our backs facing each one.
No one of us spoke a word.

"John? Are you awake?"
"Hm..." he said almost sleepy.
"Why did you want to sleep with me? " dumb shit. Why would you say that.

"Because I miss you..." he said now facing me.
"But we're still friends. We still talk. " no we don't .

"Since you started dating him you've been ignoring me. We never hang out anymore like we used to. I barely see you at weeks. "

"You think i didnt miss you?. You think I didn't feel replaced? Or ignored? Your girlfriend didnt even let me look at you.
I always felt replaced. And you didnt even mind. "
Now we lost our sleep. We were in a full deep talking.

"I'm sorry. I didnt knew you felt like that. You should've told me. I would've listened"
He said honest.

"I know and im sorry. "
"Forgiven"
"Um...y/n?" He said hiding.
"Yea?" I said sleepy.
"Can...can we cuddle...please" he was so adorable without even realising it.
"U didnt even had to ask"

His arm wrapped around my petite waist. As mine clung onto his biceps.
His cologne pitched my nose.
We fell asleep in each other's embrace.

Nothing feels better than this...
Khalid

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