vexatious (infuriating sequel)

chapter seventy

"honey i'm home!" i shout once i see jake standing in the hallway across from the front door. he is slouched over, and was clearly on his way to do something before i walked in.

"how was it?" he asks, turning to me with a goofy smile, per usual.

"so here's the thing..." i shoot him a guilty smile. how do i tell him i accidentally let a fan see julia texting me about him?

"i ran into a fan on my way out, and julia might have texted me that you told her you love her. and the fan might have seen that..." i explain the situation, trying not to cry out of guilt. today is sensitive, i don't think i can handle jake getting angry with me.

"what?" he looks at me like something about my story just isn't making sense to him. "yeah..." i trail off, not wanting to have to explain again. please don't be mad. i didn't mean to expose their relationship, even though it's a pretty big coincidence. i'm just not made for this life like they are.

"that's so funny!" he exclaims and my eyes go wide. "you're not mad?"

"i mean, it's not ideal but it's fine... i actually wanted to talk to you about that thing with julia," he admits and confusion fills my brain. when people found out about me and colby, i was lost in a panic. i guess they have much less to hide than we do, though. all colby and i do is bicker and the road here has been confusing and exhausting. to everyone else, we are just dating. to me, we've been through hell and back to get here... to a point where we can freely say we are dating.

"wanna go to my room or something?" i ask the boy. he nods slowly and i take in his appearance. he doesn't look as cheery as usual, although he isn't showing any signs of being upset. whatever happened with julia, the thing he wants to talk to me about, it must be stressing him out. i can't ignore the bags under his eyes, and the fact that his hair is unbrushed. he is a good liar, but i can tell something is wrong by the way his eyes aren't shining with joy from his latest deprecating joke.

"come on," i gesture for him to follow me as i walk through the house and down the stairs to the basement. it's still an odd concept that this is my room. i live here, with colby, jake, corey, and aaron. four other grown men. what has my life become?

"sorry, i don't have the energy to clean up... today has been a lot," i express once we get into my room. the shorts from my dresser are still laying on the ground, unfolded from when colby came in here this morning.

"you're all good! my room is a mess right now." i don't even want to imagine what the boys rooms look like. i know i'm the only one in this house that cleans on a daily basis, and i haven't step foot into aaron's room since christmas morning.

"what did you want to talk about?" i ask him once i find a seat on the edge of my bed. he is still standing, and i gesture for him to get comfortable but he ignores me and begins pacing instead. not that good of a liar now, is he?

"i told her i loved her..." he begins and his voice is hesitant.

"what about it?" i ask when silence fills the space between us. what's the big deal about that?

"she didn't say it back," he explains his panicked mannerisms.

"oh wow," i huff. what do i say? i'm sorry? i am not quite sure what their relationship is like, so i can't inject myself in their business, does he want advice or judgment?

"i know it's not your problem and i'm sure you have your own things to worry about but... i just had to tell someone," he rambles. my heart hurts at how clearly upset about this he is. "it's okay, you can always talk to me. how did she react? walk me through it," i respond. this is awkward, but i still want to be a good friend to him. i hope julia wouldn't be offended by me talking to him about this before her. she texted me that she wanted to talk, but jake is here. i can't avoid this conversation.