Speaking In Silence [Book 2]

12

I felt sick. Physically and mentally, it had been at least a week since I'd thought about him. That fucker told his sister about him too, and of course she's a fucking journalist. I was angry. So unbelievably angry. I didn't want Chloe to see, but it wouldn't stop.

"What the fuck" my breathing became more erratic and I took a step closer to Jamie.

"It's okay, Blaine, take a breath" Chloe said and put her hand on my shoulder.

"Why the fuck do you know about that? It's none of your business" I was getting more hostile by the second.

"I... I saw the article about him and then Seth told me. But then you screwed him over you know that?"

"Don't turn this on me, Killian is none of your fucking business" I got into the car and Chloe told Jamie to go inside. I pleaded that my tears wouldn't fall but they were so close.
Chloe sat in the passenger's seat, grabbing my hand and squeezing it.

"We'll talk about this tonight, okay?" All I could do was nod and wait for her to leave. Once she did, the tears came. I was hurt, and angry, and honestly I didn't know what to do.

I paced around the apartment when I got back home. I needed to calm down because I had class in a couple of hours. My breathing deepened in an attempt to steady myself. Quickening my pace, I walked circles around the coffee table until I gave up.
I sat on the ground and put my head between my knees, which seemed to work a little bit better. There were a million thoughts still racing through my mind. I thought about texting Seth, but it wouldn't do me any good. The message would just be me telling him how much of a dick he was.
Standing up, I was a little bit light headed from the headrush, so I went back down.

Chloe was very calm about the whole situation. There was still something telling me she would run, I really didn't want her to. At the same time, I wasn't ready to explain myself, it wasn't the time.
Would there ever be a time?

I checked the time. Still an hour and a half until I had to leave. I decided on sleeping since I didn't do much of that the night before. My eyelids were already growing heavy. Sighing, I set myself down on the sofa and slept, forgetting to set an alarm.

-

I woke up in a panic. I was twenty minutes late to class. I wasn't even sure if they would let me in anymore.
I quickly dressed and hopped in my truck. I sped down the road to the university and ran into the west wing. The door was closed, so I knocked. My professor opened the door and stepped out into the hallway.

"Mr. Marston, I'm glad to see you're here"

"Sorry I'm late"

"Don't let it happen again" I quickly walked to my seat and sunk into it, avoiding the stares.
I tried my best to actually learn something in the class, but I was still on edge from earlier. Would it ever stop?
As the professor rambled on, I got caught in a daydream, thinking about Jamie and how I would explain everything to Chloe. I could lie and pretend I didn't know what Jamie was talking about, but there would be no lie to explain this. In reality I just wasn't ready to talk about it but I was afraid she wouldn't take no for an answer.

Remembering where I was, I tried to shake myself back to reality. Focusing for the rest of class was difficult. I had a lot on my mind.

-

On my way to pick Chloe up from work, nerves frenzied in the pit of my stomach. This wasn't going to be fun. She wasn't even officially my girlfriend yet, even though we had been on quite a few dates. But still, she didn't need to know about him.
I crossed my fingers to somehow ward away the chance of seeing Jamie. If I saw her again I would snap. I didn't have control over myself when that happened, last time I spiraled.

I watched the door of the office building through my rear view mirror. When she finally came out, I looked at the steering wheel, taking some deep breaths. You can do this I thought to myself

I clicked the unlock control when she neared the truck, and she opened the door.

"Hey, how was work?" Faking it was my only to option. I had to seem like I was fine.

"Good, how was class?"

"It was fine. Where do you want to go?"

"Surprise me"

I took Chloe to a pop-up restaurant a little ways away. It was a small place, but it was kind of busy. I hoped that this would deter any Killian talk. I was sorely mistaken.

"Listen, Blaine. I don't care about your past, or who you've been with or any of that. What I do want to know is why Jamie made you so angry"

I exhaled slowly, "I really don't want to talk about it"

"Okay.. how about this, if you tell me why you were so angry, I'll tell you why I haven't slept with you yet"

What kind of game was that? It never really crossed my mind that there was a specific reason. I pondered her tradeoff for a moment then decided I could give her half of the story.

"Fine. Killian is my ex-boyfriend"

"Okay... what was the article Jamie talked about?"

Shit. I hoped to avoid the question.

"He was in the news for a crash" Chloe nodded. I dodged a bullet. I didn't have to tell her the rest, "your turn"

"I'm a virgin"