Don't Fuck With Feelings

Don't Jdks

Bo's POV:
Yesterday I heard Jake hit Daan. Daan didn't do anything back. I don't know why though. Daan always taught me to come up for myself and now she isn't doing it herself. Something must have happend. I haven't seen Daan all day so I couldn't check on her, I also forgot to be honest. "Bo we're gonna eat." Daan screamed from downstairs. "No I'm not gonna eat right now! I got to learn!" I said. Like I said before, I got to catch up real quick. I haven't seen any friend, not even Laim! Daan came upstairs with some food for me. "Eat it. You barely eat the last days..." Daan said. I was just really tired and focused on school. "I know, I know... I'm just tired and I wanna study, is that so bad? I need to catch up, I got a huge backlog compared to the rest!" I said while I was still writing. "I know sweetie, just eat healthy and get enough sleep." she said. I looked up. She had a blue eye. "What happend Daan?" I asked while I perfectly knew the answer. "I walked into a door" she said. "Daan I know that's not true! Jake hit you and let him! He wanted to have sex with you but you didn't want to and you still let him! You taught me to come up for myself and now you aren't doing it!" I said. Her eyes were watering. "It's complicated baby. You won't get it." she said while she put her hand on my cheek. "How can it be complicated? Daan I ain't stupid!" I said. "I just love him so much" she said. That's the whole problem. She loves him too much. But I don't think that that's the real reason why she won't resist.
I learned a little more and it was already 11 pm. I walked downstairs to get my notes because I left them downstairs. I felt down the stairs because I missed a tray and Daan immediately ran to me. "Bo what happend? are you okay? Let me help you, we're gonna get some ice for your ankle" she said. I know she was just trying to be sweet, but I wasn't really into her bullshit. I was kinda mad at her because she let Jake do whatever he want. And besides that, I really need to go back studying. "Yes I'm okay! Just leave me alone!" I said, I hoped I didn't woke up Lisa and Viv. She frowned and walked away to the kitchen, probably to get some ice. "No wait Daan please help me get up" I said. I knew she would get back. She helped me get up. We walked to the kitchen and she got ice. "Bo talk to me! You've been locking yourself up for the last few days. I need to know what's going on in your life" she said. "Nothing! There's nothing going on! Just leave me alone goddammit!" I said and stumbled away. "Don't walk away from me!" she said and grabbed my arm. I turned around and felt into her arms. I burst into tears and she hugged me tight. "Baby, please just tell me what's going on..." she said. I don't want her to think I'm a softie... But I don't wanna pretend I'm happy anymore... "Everything! Everything is wrong for God's sake!" I said and cried even harder. I needed to sit so I sit on the ground and Daan still sat next to me. "What's everything? I can't see your mind Bo. Be specific please, it breaks my heart to see you like this." she said. "I have so much stress about thing that haven't even happend. School is stressing me out and I have to catch up with everything. And I'm always worrying about thing that happend in the past." I said. "It's like I have 2 voices in my head, and they're constantly fighting with eachother. One of them says: What you've been trough isn't nothing! And then the other one says: Don't be such a softie, there are people who have been trough worst. And then the other one says again: it's okay to cry sometimes." I said. She looked at me like she understood. "I've had those too. It's okay to cry. You've seen things and felt things that are so, so scary. You've been trough so much and it's okay to feel sad." she said. "And what's with school?" I knew that if I would tell her she'll help me, but I don't wanna annoy her with MY struggles. "It's nothing I'm just a little stressed about school but also about other stuff. Anyways I'm going to study again." I said. "Tell me about them" she said. I didn't really know what to say and I was silence for a while, I took a deep breath and said: "Everyone is making a book out of their lifes. Every story you have is going in the book, every bit of your life. And when you're older you can read your book to you're grandchildren or people you love. But everyone has a chapter that they don't want to read out loud. Well... My whole book consists out of chapters I don't want to read out loud. I'm so, so tired of being so exhausted." She started to tear up. I know she was trying to hide hear tears though. "I'm so sorry that most of that chapters are because of me. I just wanna say that there are good chapters in your life, and we're gonna make so much more. You ain't a softie, in my eyes you're a hero. You've been through so much and you're still standing strong. We're family and you're absolutely not a pain in the ass. You've made me laugh so much in the past couple of weeks... I wish I could take over your pain and struggles. I love you little asskicker" she said. She hasn't called me little asskicker in a long time. When I was little about the age of 7/8 she'd call me little asskicker. "I love you too." I said. She smiled and helped me get up. "You're such a softie" I laughed. "Shut up" she laughed. "If you don't want to go to school yet I get it okay?" If I'm not going to school for a few weeks, I have to catch up again... "Those are my sweatpants btw, give it back!" she said. I steal so much of her clothes. They're just comfy and we have the same sizes. "You want me to strip right now?" I said. "No nevermind just give them back tomorrow. Now get your ass back up and go sleep" she said. I just realized that Daan and I really have a lovehate relationship. We love each other so much but we can't stand eachother because we look zo much alike.