I'm a weak person, so I'm sorry if it seems I lay on your shoulder too much. Even if I've never actually literally done that before.
I just, like having someone I can ask for help, and feel comforted. I just feel like the smaller person sometimes even if I'm the one who lets you vent to me sometimes, I just enjoy all of our talks, I enjoy all the time we spend together, and I cherish it all just so much, I wish I could tell you this in person and just confide to you all of what I feel about you, and yet when we're together in person I can't; I freeze up, I feel anxious cause there's others around, I don't wanna be awkward, I don't wanna embarrass you in front of your friends, I feel like I don't fit in, that I'm an abnormality in your friend group, that I stand out like a needle in a bowl of rice, I just want to physically and vocally show you how much I really appreciate you, I miss you a lot whenever I don't get give the hug I wanted to give you; or I don't tell you the thing you did today that made me feel warm inside, or just, something I've always wanted to try with you, like just like sitting on a bench together in peace, away from everything, and I can finally be the one resting my head on your shoulder, because I still haven't ever done that before, or any of these things that I see people do all the time, because I really just am awkward.
And if you've read this all, thank you. I just... I really want to tell this person how I feel, yet I can't.
I want to just sit with her and only her, and I can't.
I can't do what I want, but I guess I have to be okay with what I can.
And that's alright.
YOU ARE READING
Psychology Anthology:Optus Jargon
PoetryLife. Life is complex. Life hurts. Life loves. Sometimes you love life. Sometimes you hate it. Sometimes you just want to give it all up. Sometimes you just want to stay in a place, forever. Sometimes it's never. Sometimes it's always. Sometimes you...
