Hearts

five

We fell into a comfortable routine. Romeo would drag me out of bed too early in the morning, we would pack, and we would make our way downstairs to eat our complimentary hotel breakfast. We would get on the road, usually with Romeo driving, and we would stop for lunch at a gas station. At some point, Romeo would book a hotel in the general direction that we were headed. In the afternoon, we'd take turns napping and driving. Dinner was sometimes obtained at a fast food drive-thru, sometimes skipped. In our hotel room, I would write if I felt like it, Romeo would write without fail, and I'd call Shawna. Then, I'd go out for a walk, either fully clothed under the setting sun or in my underwear through the rain.

Romeo and I talked a lot. I'd find my throat dry after every conversation because there was constantly too much that I had to say to him. With Shawna, we connected more through silence. With Romeo, though, I would never run out of words. He was a good listener, and he filled in for me when I had to gulp down water and take a few deep breaths. When neither of us were asleep, we were talking. With all the words we exchanged, I fell deeper into the pit of not wanting to ever know another human like I knew him.

"It's happening again," I told Shawna during one of our video calls. I understood that, if what Romeo had said about her being in love with me was true, I probably shouldn't be talking about this to her, but she had yet to confirm it. Also, she showed no signs of not wanting to hear me gush about Romeo, so I pushed on.

"What is?" she had asked.

"Romeo," I explained.

Shawna snorted. "Well, sounds like you're fucked."

"Yeah, but what else is new?"

Shawna shrugged. I waited, hoping she would say more. She didn't. Shawna always held back her true thoughts, but she was doing a lot more of that lately.

In all honesty, I was worried about her. She went to a different party almost every night, and although there was a healthy amount of socializing that could be obtained from parties, there was also an unhealthy amount of illegal substances that could just as easily be obtained. I didn't want to ask Shawna what she did at parties, but the incoherent, typo-riddled texts that she sent late at night spoke for her. Nonetheless, I did appreciate that she usually waited for my phone call before going out in the evening.

Today, however, she didn't pick up. I figured that she had already left home, and I didn't think much of it.

"No answer?" Romeo said when he saw me leave the bathroom, phone in hand.

"Not today."

"Are you going on a walk?"

"Yeah." I stepped into my shoes. "Wanna come?"

"Are you sure? I thought this was supposed to be your alone time."

"No," I said. "It just happened that way because I didn't want to bother you while you were writing. You can join me if you feel like getting out of bed." "Okay." Romeo shut his laptop.

"How's the writing going, by the way?" I asked him as he put on his shoes.

"Good, I think." Romeo shrugged. "Not sure how exciting it is, but I have some good scenes, and I haven't hit extreme writer's block yet. Writing's so much easier when I don't have to do it for school."

I had also found that to be true. The pressures of getting a good grade on an essay that I hated writing were gone, and I was all the better for it.

Romeo grabbed the hotel key card, and we left the room together.

"How is she, do you know?" Romeo asked as we got in the elevator. "Is Shawna having the time of her life back at home?"

I pushed the button for the first floor. "I can't tell. I hope so."