𝐋𝐄𝐀𝐏 𝐘𝐄𝐀𝐑 , doctor who

vi. february 29th, 1540

journal entry #5 AN ENTRY ON THE VISIT
DURING THE YEAR OF OUR LORD, 1540.

"You are going to break soon, Doctor."

He had said no words when he arrived earlier that day. I had expected all smiles as on my 12th birthday, but my sweet 16 was not so. He opened his impenetrable door and his knees buckled with no words. He clung to the back of my dress shirt as we engulfed one another, and all I could seem to do was pat his back as he silently mourned for those I did not know.

I quietly set him down on my bed and started up my precious fireplace, starting our first conversation of the day.

"What happened?" I asked when he did not respond. He shrugged, mouth opening a bit to let out a devastated sigh.

"Too much, Abraham," he finally spoke up with a wavering voice. He looked at me with the same face as last time, but I could somehow sense  the previous lifetimes he bore. He had lost someone, I realized. When you loose something, you tend to remember everything else you had lost. "But you look lively. Figure out the marriage thing?"

I hesitated to answer at first, but as his eyes shined I could tell he needed the good news.

"Well, Jesabele and I have Horatio now, if that's any clue. He would be eleven months now." The Doctor let loose a genuine smile, a laugh racking his lungs.

"Oh, how brilliant!" He exclaimed, placing a hand on the nape of my neck lovingly. "I knew there was something different about your touch."

"And what's that?"

"The gentleness and concern of a proud father," he beamed. I smiled abashedly and nodded curtly. Horatio was my everything. "And Jesabele, I assume she's your wife?"

"Yes, sir," I responded. His face fell as my voice cracked. I had become a man long ago, so there was no reason for my voice to be doing all the extras. I gulped as he stared at me.

"Not going well?"

"Oh, it is all so splendid, Doctor. I love her with all my heart." He raised a sharp eyebrow for he could tell I was hiding something. Not a single word I had said was a lie, but every single word hid something deeper. "I just– remember what we talked about last time?"

"Of course," he hummed with a frown. "Still haven't figured it out?"

"I am not sure." I lied through my teeth

"Either way," he changed the subject much to my relief, "don't you think it's time for little Horatio to meet his Uncle Doctor? And I'd love to meet the lovely lady."

"Uncle Doctor?" I repeated with a scoff. "Grandfather Doctor suits you much better."

He laughed loudly, a wonderful sound that kept the Earth in alignment and halted wars. I held onto that noise every time I heard it that day.

I held onto the way The Doctor politely kissed my wife's hand. I held onto the way The Doctor scooped little Horatio into his arms and began talking to him a mile a minute. I held onto the way The Doctor looked at me, with love and understanding and acceptance, all the qualities of a true friend.

I held onto it for the next four years.