parts that are italic are parts that are going to be at the bottom with the way i interpret it and my personal experience of something similar.
•••
i spent a long time
watering a plant made out of plastic
and i cursed the ground for growing green
i spent a long time
substituting honest with sarcastic
and i cursed my tongue for being mean
and weightless breathless restitute
motionless and absolute
you cut me open sucked the poison
from an aging wound
now fifty thousand war cadets
would cower at this small brunette
to my surprise not six feet high
who'd reach and grab the moon
if i should ask or just imply
that i wanted a bit more light
so i could look inside his eyes
and get the colours just right
just right
just right
just
build love, build god, build provinces
build calluses, break promises
cause i could never hold a perfect thing
and not demolish it
what am i thinking
what does this mean
how could somebody ever love me
talk to your man
tell him he's got bad news comin'
- forever ... (is a long time), halsey
•••
"i spent a long time watering a plant made out of plastic, and i cursed the ground for growing green"
i've too often associated myself with people that need help but can't be fixed by anyone but themselves. i've too often loved someone and tried to help them and they've given nothing back to me. i've too often tried to heal people and they gave me false hope and then bring down again and again. but then again, that was my fault to begin with.
"i cursed my tongue for being mean"
sometimes i forget that i shouldn't take my pain of what others have brought onto me and hurt the good around me in the process. sometimes i feel too broken to remember that not everyone hurt me. and sometimes i forget that i make mistakes, just like everyone else.
"you cut me open, sucked the poison from an aging wound"
i was once already broken and you took that opportunity to break me again. i know you don't mean to, but you can't keep breaking what's already been broken, otherwise, there's going to be nothing left to hold onto.
"so i could look inside his eyes and get the colours just right"
i couldn't forget your eyes.
"cause i could never hold a perfect thing and not demolish it"
i break everything i touch. and it may not always be my fault, but i leave just as fast as i come. i hurt people unintentionally once they hurt me. but i also don't think it's always entirely my fault.
"how could somebody ever love me"
a constant worry of mine is that i'm never enough for someone to love me.
YOU ARE READING
sickly sweet
Poesíathis is a book of poems or thoughts/feelings i have, all written down. heartbreak, love, pain, happiness and many more emotions and feelings of emptiness are all spread out in the words of this book. each chapter has a category, you'll find pattern...
