After Death | Bucky Barnes(Republished)

Strategies

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      I left my room door unlocked, closing and locking the bathroom door. I took my shower, dried myself and put on a pair of jeans and a regular t-shirt. I may have taken longer than I thought when I heard a knock on my door. 

"Dammit." I whispered, 

"Come on in, it's open." I shouted. 

I heard the door open and close, I hastily combed through my wet hair and then tried to dry it with a towel as I walked out to my room barefoot. He stood with his arms crossed, looking at all the weapons on my wall, I walked until I was at his side.

He seemed even taller here standing next to me in my room.

"It's quite a collection you've got here." He said still not looking at me as I continued to dry my hair with the towel, I realized I was staring.

"Uh yeah," I chuckled, "Phil knows me pretty well." 

My hair stopped dripping so I took a few steps half way to my bed and tossed the towel at the foot of it. I turned back to look at Bucky, surprised to find him already looking back at me with a soft smile on his lips. 

I smiled back before I saw his eyes flicker down to my neck. A pained expression quickly replaced his soft smile. 

I'm so stupid.

I had completely forgotten.

 He opened his mouth to speak, but I cut him of.

"No." I spoke quickly, "I know what you're gonna say. I know It was an accident, you didn't mean to do it and you can't keep blaming yourself... We're a team now and you can't shut me out."

"The last thing I want to do is hurt the ones I care about." His voice dripping with pain. I walked the short space between us until I was about two feet from him. 

"I know you won't hurt me." I said looking into his eyes. He took a step closer to me, I couldn't read his expression. Fear? Nervousness? Worry? He reached out with both arms and unexpectedly pulled me in for a hug. I hesitated at first, then finally giving in and wrapping my arms around his waist, resting my forehead against his warm chest and closed my eyes. It felt comfortable, warm, my head fit perfectly under his chin. 

"I'm sorry." he whispered in my ear, I nodded and turned my head so my ear was now pressed against his chest, I listened to his steady heartbeat, I felt him take a deep breath and realized it was a pretty long hug.

"Uh.." I moved my hands to his chest and his slid down to my waist, I pull back so I could see his face. His eyes flickered down to my lips as he bit his lower lip.

"We should get started." I blurted out to which he smiled widely at my awkwardness.
I heard it just as I said it.

"I mean- with the plans for tomorrows mission." I spoke quickly, pulling away from him and walking to the desk. I hear him chuckle behind me. I was mentally kicking myself, he was right there looking as gorgeous as ever and I had to panic and go put my foot in my mouth.

I sat at the chair by the desk turning on the holotable, I put my left elbow on the holotable and rest my chin on my hand as I look through files and as he took the chair across from me. I pulled up the building so its projected in front of us, I enlarge the image and play with it from different angles, neither of us saying a word. 

"We should get started." Smiled widely. 

"Shut up" I said trying to keep a straight face, I fail and laughing along with him.

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      We spent hours going over different strategies, discussing what could go wrong, being thorough with every single move. He had taken one of my knifes and had started playing with it I watched how he easily maneuvered the blade through his fingers. I wasn't gonna lie, I was tired, I glanced at the clock on my nightstand, 1:43 am. I pushed my hair back out of my face with my hand then went to look at the holotable again. I rested my elbow on the table, absentmindedly started biting my thumb nail softly as I racked my brain for a better plan. I glanced at him, he was already watching me, he looked surprised that I had caught him, making him drop the blade on the floor. He quickly leaned in his chair to pick it up.

"Why do you keep looking at me like that?" I asked when he sat up.

"You look tired that's all." He said.

"That's what a girl wants to hear." I chuckled.

 "That's not what i meant." He smiled, "I was gonna suggest taking a break, we leave in a few hours and we haven't slept at all."

"Yeah... I guess." I said. 

"I'll wake you in a few hours." He said as he stood up, "And I'm taking this." he waved the knife in his hand. 

"Ill get it back." I smiled as we walked to the door.

"Goodnight." He said with a soft smile, I said goodnight as well and closed the door. I pulled down the covers of my bed and got in. I didn't bother to change into my pajamas and switched off the light. 

A knock on the door woke me, I swore I had just climbed in to bed just seconds ago. I looked at the green numbers on the clock, at least three hours had passed by.

"Y/n, it's time, get up." Bucky said, his voice muffled by the door. I groaned pulling one of the pillows over my face I held it down with both my hands. I heard the door open and the lights turn on, followed by his footsteps getting closer.

"You know, I halfly expected you to be ready to go, still looking over the plans." He chuckled but I didn't answer. 

"Come on, get up." I could hear a smile in his voice, then my pillow was being taken away from my face. I groaned, turning my back to him, pulling the sheets over my face.

"I didn't want to do this." he said, the next thing I knew he yanked the covers off me in one swift motion.I felt his cold metal arm on my waist followed by his other hand, then quickly throwing me over his left shoulder.

"Seriously?!" I shouted. He didn't even look like he was making any effort to lift me. 

"Yeah, seriously." He said, clearly amused.

"Okay, ha ha very funny, I'm up. You can put me down now." I said. He set me down softly. He was already wearing his uniform all ready to go. I stared at a spot on his chest, I didn't want to look up and see his eyes looking at me and that smile of his.

"Five more minutes, that's all I wanted, but no." I took a deep breath. "Give me ten minutes to get ready." I said walking to my closet, grabbing my uniform and going to the bathroom.

"I like your hair." he said, making himself comfortable on my bed as I was about to close the bathroom door,\

"Ha ha. Shut up." I said looking at him. He had this huge smile on his face. I closed and locked the door, set my stuff on the counter and looked in the mirror to the crow's nest I called hair. How the hell does Nat look so perfect 24/7.

Published July 13, 2015

Republished April 13, 2016