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-ˏˋ𝘾𝙃𝘼𝙋𝙏𝙀𝙍 𝙏𝙃𝙍𝙀𝙀 ˎˊ˗ ════ ⋆͛♡⋆͛ ════
When Rory wakes up, she feels like shit. She feels the repercussions of her actions before she looks them in the face—she can see Matt's terrified body, paralysed and unable to move. When she closes her eyes, she thinks she can feel his trembling limbs under her fingers. She tastes the remnants of his blood in his mouth; she remembers it all. She shouldn't know what Matt's blood tastes like. She wants to die.
She plucks the pillow from behind her head, shoving it against her face. Maybe if she tries hard enough, she can suffocate herself before she has the chance to confront the day. Turning on her humanity again wasn't something that was planned—what surprised her even more was that it wasn't the thought of Elena's death that got her to switch it on again, it was Klaus. Why the hell was it Klaus? Why him? Sure, they had started over, become friends, kissed... but Elena was her sister. The thought of her death should've paralysed her. The mention of werewolf venom flowing through her veins should've blown Rory away so badly that she should've switched it on right there. But instead, Klaus convinced her.
The pillow is plucked away from her grip and from her face before she has a chance to even say anything. Rory's eyes peel open to see a pair of cerulean blue ones peering down at her. Klaus has a look of concern in his eyes. Sometimes, it's so easy for Rory to think he's Nik again. Her sweet, kindhearted boyfriend that wouldn't hurt a fly. But he's still Klaus. Klaus who lied to her and fooled her and cares for her and makes her feel warm when she shouldn't feel so safe in the arms of a killer and be so willing to run away with him.
"How do you feel?" Klaus asks when she sits up in front of him, knees tugged against her chest. He reaches forward, and Rory doesn't flinch away from his touch. She leans her cheek against his palm as his hand is placed over the side of her face. His fingers trace over her cheekbone, running a hand through her hair.
"Like a bus ran me over, backed up over my crumpled body and ran me over again," Rory responds truthfully. She presses her forehead against her knees. Klaus doesn't shift, he simply resumes stroking his thumb over the skin of her hand. "I feel like absolute crap, Klaus. That's what I feel like. I feel like I put my best friend's life in danger and I wasn't there for my sister when she needed me."
"You had your humanity off, Rory. It's okay," Klaus murmurs softly. "Matt will understand."
"I can't do this, Klaus," Rory breathes out. "I can't keep doing this. Now that I know there's an option to feel... like that," Rory shifts, swallowing the bile that threatens to crawl up her throat. "An option to just turn everything off when everything gets too bad. I don't know, it just—I just don't think that I should be able to have that option."
"I think I may know of something that can help you," Klaus says.
"Really? You know a way to take away this stupid curse of immortality?" Rory scoffs.
