HIS POSSESSION [ Under Editing ]

20. TEARS AND SECRETS

( Akshat's P.O.V )

I picked the nearest thing my hand could reach and threw it with all the force I could muster, across the room.
The thing happened to be the glass holder, upon making contact with hard wall it shattered into thousand pieces reminding me of my broken heart.

My eyes brimmed with unshed tears as I slide down against the wall , defeated and devastated.
My mind clouded with unanswered questions,

What happened to Guddan.!?
Why did she leave me like that.
Have I done something wrong,

The door of my room creaked open and Angad came near me with slow strides,
He sat down beside me and we both stared at nothing particular in complete silence.
A wave of raw emotion coursed through me and a single tear rolled down from the corner of my eye.
Why you left Guddan,
I want her with me, No I need her.

" Guddan thinks you are playing with her, "
Angad's declaration shocked me to the core, I couldn't bring myself to ask him for any sort of clarification,
He turned towards me and squeezed my shoulder in a brotherly way.

" She is not sure about herself Brother, She thinks she is not good enough for you.
Don't leave her alone in this volcano of sadness and insecurities, she needs you.
Go find her and make her believe, you really like her,
Gain her trust, she needs you too.
Go, everything will be fine "

I wonder if Angad really is my younger brother, he surely talks and acts like older one.
I wiped my eyes with the sleeve of my shirt and pulled Angad in a hug.
He chuckled and patted by back,
I pulled away from the hug and went out the door in search of my girl.

_________________________________________

2 hours,

2 hours have passed since I left my house in search of Guddan,
I looked for her everywhere, even in college but she just seems to disappear god knows where. A feeling of dread and helplessness settled down deep inside me,

Lastly after finding no other option, I made my way to Guddan's house and knocked at the door,
Awhile later I came face to face with a Grumpy Aanya,
But I think she saw the broken and helpless expression on my face as she opened the door wide and invited me in.

" Aanya, I searched for Guddan everywhere, She is nowhere, just disappeared. Have you contacted her.? "

" What do you mean by disappeared, She was with you, wasn't she "

" Aanya that's a talk for another time, Are you aware of any place where I can find Guddan " I asked her desperately.

She dropped down the subject for then as realisation dawned on her,.
Her eyes widened in panic,

" There's one place she usually goes whenever she gets upset or feels low, I'll tell you the address "

Aanya told me the address of the place where I can find Guddan and I hurriedly went in that direction.

_________________________________________

Panic inside me intensified a thousand times when I found myself standing at the top most peak of the hilly area.
Aanya told me about this place, and true to her words I saw Guddan sitting all alone at the rock shivering, she was soaked wet.
My heart shattered all over again upon this sight,
I quietly approached her and sat down beside her,
She felt my presence, I noticed her breathing got hitched momentarily but she didn't show any external sign of surprise as if she was expecting me there.

So many questions were swirling in my head forcing to come out but I didn't wanted to break the moment.
Everything was situated silently under the dark blanket of stillness,
Guddan and I just sat there next to each other close yet too far,
After a long wrecking moment Guddan broke the silence and I just listened to her in complete shock, stunned.

" I was just seventeen when I saw my Mom fading away in front of my eyes from an incurable disease,
I was trying to cope at my best level but what could i've done alone,
A teenager whose pillar of support was broken, I had a perfect family of Me Mom & Dad which I was proud of,.
After Mom this faded too,

Dad remarried, a part of me was angry, I thought Dad betrayed Mom by marrying another women. He is replacing Mom.
But another part of me was slightly happy too, i assumed that my step-mother will become my pillar of strength, she will chase away this darkness of sadness inside me.

How naive I was, She never liked me.
She totally disregarded me as a stranger,
Even Dad never noticed me like he used to before.
Everything changed,
I was not living but dragging my life, it felt like I was invisible,
The happy & jolly part of me faded away with Mom leaving me a shell with no emotions and a heart surrounded by walls.

I closed myself off from every emotion,
Only one person was there who reciprocated my love and showered it back,
My step-sister Revati,
But My step-mother believed that I'm a bad influence on Revati so she made this her goal to break me apart from Dad and my sister.

She fuelled the fire of misunderstanding between me and my family bit by bit over years,
She accused me of being a bad omen for her family and that was the last straw to my patience,

I left my childhood house and came here with Aanya with a strong determination and a concreted wall around my heart.
I swore to never fall for any charm, I regarded it all as an illusion,

Then you entered my life and broke down the wall, brick by brick,
I don't want to feel helpless, I don't want to feel that stage of lonliness again,

You too will eventually leave me, no one stays,
You are perfect Akshat, You have a perfect family, a perfect life ahead,
And me, what about me, I've nothing.

How can I believe in this between us.? 
I'm afraid of being vulnerable. "

Guddan squeezed her eyes tightly in an attempt to stop her tears, i reached out for her but she refused my help,
she abruptly stood up and disappered in the dark night without even a second glance at me.
My heart, mind and whole body itched to run after her, to take her in my arms and beg for her trust.

But I know relationship doesn't work like this,
I have to gain her trust, I've to and I'll show her, that I'll never leave her alone.

I swear I'll never put her in that lone stage, I'll make sure she get what she deserves, a perfect life.
I'll give her the love of a perfect family for which her heart is longing,

I promised myself,  I'll break down the whole damn wall around her heart and fill it with love and happiness,

And this is a promise I fully intend to keep.

I never thought in my wildest dreams that how wrong I was,
How this newfound relation of Guddan and me is going to take a massive turn in near future,
I never once imagined, my own heart will cry a soundless, helpless cry in an alone night.
I never thought my own trust and promises are going to crumble horribly.
I never thought I'll get betrayed this way.

I never imagined that this is the silence before a cyclone.