passing notes | j.jk

chapter 49

It was a beautiful spring day, and I was splayed on the ground of our playground, tears falling freely from my eyes after making an unfortunate meeting with the concrete.  My knee was in a red-hot pain, hitting the ground directly and being scraped across the surface. 

As if it couldn't get worse, it seemed as if no one noticed my predicament, since all of my classmates were making their way back into the school building. I did not want to be left behind, especially with an injury, so I gathered enough strength to push my face from the floor and into a sitting position. 

I attempted to wipe the tears away from my eyes and watched as the kids disappear around the corner into the school. From my watery vision, I saw the rip in my pants where it should have been covering my knee, as well as a blurry splotch of red. The realization of knowing that I ripped my pants made even more tears well up in my eyes, as well as the sting of pain from my knee.

I rubbed my knuckles against my eyes to clear the tears away, my breath coming in at hitches.

I tried to move so that I could catch up with the rest of my class, but my knee rendered my leg useless. I couldn't move quickly, and when I did my whole leg flared up in pain. A quiet whimper escaped my lips as I sat there, watching my class move farther away, happy expressions gracing their innocent faces.

A wave of overwhelming emotions washed over me as they turned the corner, and tears began to fall again before I could think about them. They streamed down my face, staining my face and making dark circles on my school uniform.

I felt as if I sat there for hours, my head buried in my arms to hide away from the bright sun, still crying all the same.

I had no idea that there was someone looking for me until I felt rapid taps on my shoulder and lifted my head from my shadow to see.

And it was Bitna.

It wasn't the first time I had seen her. I had always noticed her around, playing by herself or with one other friend, quiet and calm when other students would be rambunctious. She had wide, curious eyes, ones that were filled with wonder whenever we read a new story in class or experimented with growing plants.

Those same eyes were peering down at me, growing even more at the sight of my tears and blood.

"Jungkook," she gasped, her hand covering her mouth, "What happened to you? Are you okay?"

"No-no," I stuttered, trying to tame my erratic breath and wipe my tears, "I fel-fell, and my class left me alo-lone. And, and, my knee hurts a lot." My voice pitched higher on the last word, and Bitna's features morphed downwards, pouting at my despair. She seemed to ponder in front of me for a second, before reaching her hand down toward me.

"Do you think you can get up?" she asked, and I shook my head, my shoulders rising and falling in sync with my breathing.

"Oh, okay. I'm going to try to lift you up, okay?" Bitna said, walking to my right side and crouching down to my level. I felt her small hand wrap around the space beneath my arms, having a secure grip on me.

"Put your arm on my shoulder, Jungkook," she said, and I did, making sure not to grip onto her too much.

"Okay, I'm going to get up now. If I'm going too fast, then tell me to slow down, okay?" she said, and I nodded in affirmation.

As steadily as she could, she pulled me up from the ground. I could sense her caution with me, going slow to guarantee that the walk wouldn't cause me any pain.

And as we began to walk back inside the school, the pain that I felt before started to dissipate, along with the tears that had fallen down my face. By the time we met with the frantic teacher that was searching for the both of us, the sting from the fall hardly fazed me.

Instead, my mind was filled with the thought of my classmate, one who, at the moment, I felt the most grateful for.

And when she turned her head to smile at me, saying how she would take me to the nurse's office, it was the first time that I could remember the strange emotion of endearment. It only amplified when she put her arm back around me, chattering about all her interests and inquiring about mine in order to get to know each other more.

I never made a friend so quickly before.

And just as the memory came rushing back into my mind, I looked to Bitna, remembering the innocent, joyful expression that covered her countenance in the past.

It was gone now, but a remnant of a grin was still on her face, and the corner of her lips rose when she saw my face wash over in understanding.

"You remember now, huh?"

"Yeah," I said, the forgotten moment now settling in my consciousness, "It's like we're reliving it."

"Mhm," Bitna agreed, glancing at her hand before she looked at me again, "I'm glad you remembered."

And for a second, her eyes were the same wide, curious ones that I noticed long ago during class time. The ones who peered down at me in concern, and always cared for me even when I was alone. The ones that always smiled at me and sparkled with joy, just to take my mind off of all other things. 

For a second, I saw the first pair of eyes that I had ever fallen for. 

A/N: shit. 

it's been way too fucking long. i don't even know what to say anymore because at this point my excuses are bs. i'm astounded at the fact that people are still reading this though, and i am really grateful (i just never seem to show it by, y'know, uploading). 

i still feel some responsibility for this story so i will finish it someday, but i just don't know when. but, thank you to all the people who commented, voted, added to their library, and just read silently. you guys are literally troopers for sticking with this shit. there are about 20 or so chapters left of this story so hopefully, you can stick around until the end. 

i don't know how to feel about this chapter. i will possibly rewrite it because it feels a little off to me, but i hope that you like this flashback/history of jungkook and bitna. 

i will come back. 

+ have a wonderful day/night, wherever you are.