i sacrificed you
like i believed i should
on the altar of open hands
no clenched fists
no eyes squeezed shut to block out anything that shouldn't be
i prayed it was best
i believed it was best
i thought it was best.
and now,
what i thought God had gently folded my hands back over
a warm smile on His face and pride in His eyes
seems stolen away from me.
my hands are empty and i am crying out to anybody and everybody
to fill them back up.
if we are so sure,
who else has to be?
i teased and asked if you were getting my telekinetic message
even though telekinetic wasn't quite the right word,
my hints echoed in the stairwell
and the rain hit the sides of the building.
just like today hit the sides of my being.
i leaned over
as you took item after item
even though everything was and is and will always be yours,
just trying to understand and pick up on what i needed our last touch to be
our connection was severed, you said
and i didn't believe that for a second
i leaned over and pressed my soul against yours
and in that moment,
everything i have ever held dear or has ever mattered to me
was transferred over to you.
for memories
or for safe-keeping...
i'm not sure.
but i am left with nothing because i have given you my all.
YOU ARE READING
ruby
Poetrypoems about the next stage of my life, hopefully about new experiences but also about hanging onto something the heart has desperately longed for and isn't quite ready to give up