forget gold,
everything i touch turns to
rubble..........
what am i supposed to say?
when the people ask
"how is stuff at home?"
how do i even begin to describe
how much of a home it isn't?
the absence of a father,
a husband,
a role model
is
glaringly obvious
i know exactly what they insinuate,
what they try to lovingly pry at.
but i don't want to share,
i don't want this fallout to reach you too.
this has already scared many loves and many friends off,
i won't have it distort the way you see me too....
why is it that distance only makes
some hearts
fonder?...
at least i committed to my downfall.
you were the one ready for the nearest exit ramp but chose to blame me for pointing out the sign.
- "i won't justify myself for how i heal."
...
what a loaded phrase,
nothing is permanent.
YOU ARE READING
ruby
Poetrypoems about the next stage of my life, hopefully about new experiences but also about hanging onto something the heart has desperately longed for and isn't quite ready to give up