Saviour (Andy Biersack)

Chapter 15

I slowly open my eyes, soar and tear stained from the night before.
I lay here, on the cold floor. Broken, cracks in my heart as if I was a piece of glass. I place my hand on the cold floor and clench it into a fist. I try to breathe. In. out. My lungs clench, but I manage to make it.

I feel like my heart has been cut open. And I've bled out. There's nothing left.

I feel like zombie. But only zombies can't feel.

I feel like I'm dead, but my feelings are still there.

I feel like I want to scream, but all I want is the silence.

Conflicted emotions, filling my head with thoughts that are unwanted. Filling my heart with the sorrow and pain.

I get up off of the floor and walk into the kitchenette. I see my phone and pick it up. Looking at the time, 12:30. I've been asleep for sixteen hours. If only I could've stayed asleep.

I try the internet once again, picking up my phone. I feel my mind fill with frustration as I read the notification. "We're sorry, You've Gone Over Your Limit For Internet Access, If You'd Like To Purchase More Time for $20.00 press 1"
I slam my phone onto the table in frustration. Why did I have to use up all my time, why couldn't I have the money. There's nothing I can do.
I drag myself out of the chair and walk over to my open bag. For the first time since I arrived, I would write in my notebook. I picked it up and a pen and began to write.

"A poem by Hannah" I begin.

GONE

Can you feel that?
It's the force of emptiness in the air.
Can you hear that?
It's the wind calling your name.

Breathe.
For you are not as alone as you think.
But I am.
Alone, Cold. Nothing
Nothing in this unsatisfying world of hate.
Do you see that?
The smile that was once on my face.
But it is now gone.
For so are they...
And so is my soul.'

I read over my work. Not one of my best, but it gets the point across. I lay my head down on the cold table. Everything is cold. There is nothing to warm it. Everything is dark. I feel no need to have the lights on. So I close my eyes and try to wish away the hurt.

Everything is silent...

but suddenly I hear the phone ring.

I lift my head up and look at the phone. I see the caller ID.

"Andy <3" along with a picture of him. I quickly pick up my phone and answer it.

"Andy?" I say unbelievingly. "Hannah!" He sounds relieved. I felt my heart skip a beat when I heard his voice.
"Oh my God! Andy! You called, I thought you'd forgotten"
I felt my face start to burn, when suddenly I remembered the letter I sent.
"I'm so sorry, I just, I couldn't... please forgive me Andy, I just was so upset and didn't know what to do! None of you picked up your phone and I have no internet and I just... I'm sorry. There was no other way." I felt a lump form in my throat.
"Hannah, you have nothing to be sorry about! I should've told you that I was cut off from all communication! We all were! It's my fault!"
I was confused by his words.
"You where cut off from communication? But why?" I shook my head.
"Because, the phones and internet don't work out of the states, it's complicated, but it's super expensive"
I felt horrible, just wishing I'd known. I would've never sent that letter.
"How are you calling me now then?" He laughed.
"I managed to sneak to a phone booth. They're everywhere here in England." I shook my head and smiled. "You did that for me?" I felt my heart start to come back to life, starting to beat again, starting to feel the warmth. "Of course, I'd do anything for you. Hannah, you're everything to me. And I just wish you'd know how it killed me inside to know you felt that way." I smiled slightly at how much he cared. "Thank you, Andy. And I only said what I said because I missed you so much. I thought you had left for good. I just wanted you to know how much you all meant to me before I moved on myself. Well, at least tried. I know it would've never worked."

"You're never going to have to worry about that. I'm not going anywhere." I smiled slightly. "Hannah, I need you to do something for me." I took a deep breath. "Anything, what is it?"
"I need you to go to the park, call me when you get there okay?" I tried making sense out of his words, but I couldn't. "Okay, but why?" I asked hoping for an explanation.
"No time to explain. Please just do this for me." I nodded and remembered that he couldn't see me. "Okay." I didn't want to say goodbye. I wasn't ready for it. "And Hannah?" His voice was suddenly sincere. "Yes?" He took a deep breath. "I love you, so, so much." I smiled. "It's been way to long since I've heard those words." I paused. "I love you too Andy, more than anything." With that we said our goodbyes and hung up.

I ran into the bathroom and looked in the mirror. I washed my face, the black off of my cheeks and got out my makeup. I quickly applied my thick black eyeliner and mascara and put on some peach colored lip gloss. I put concealer on trying to hide the circles under my eyes.
I ran a brush through my hair and changed putting on my black baggy tank top with a gold heart on it, my black and white tribal skinny jeans and my heeled boots.
I grabbed my phone and my purse and ran outside. I got into the first taxi I saw and told them to bring me to the park.
When I arrived I walked into the entrance, it was the same one as before. I felt a huge wave of Deja vu wash over me. I felt tears start to come but I quickly blinked them away as I pulled my phone out of my pocket and called Andy.
"Hello?" I heard his voice, causing my heart to beat one million miles per hour. "Hey" I said trying to pull myself out of shock.
"You at the park?" He asked calmly.
"Yeah, um, what was it that you want me to do again?" I asked snapping out of it. "Walk over to the place we where before..." I was hesitant but I walked over. I looked down at the ground as I remembered. "What's wrong?" He asked.
I sighed, "It's nothing, it's just hard to remember sometimes." I told him.
"It's okay, you only have to do one more thing okay?" I nodded to myself "Okay... what is it?"

(Warning Cuteness Overloaded)

"Turn around..."

I did as I was told and there he was. Andy was standing ten foot from me. I ran over to him and jumped into his arms.
I kissed him wrapping my legs around his waste and running my fingers through his hair and wrapping my arms around his neck as I kissed him.
I got down off of him and rested my hands on his chest. I closed my eyes and leaned my head against him. "This isn't real." I told myself. He lifted my head with his hand gently.
"But it is..." I looked into his crystal blue eyes and got lost in them. Those eyes that I missed so much for what seemed like an eternity right in front of me again. He gently placed his lips against mine and I smiled into the kiss.
"I love you." I whispered.
"I love you more"
"Impossible"
I took his hand and led him over to the tree nearest to us. He wrapped his arms around me and I curled up against his chest. I smiled knowing that I was safe in his arms again. I felt the warmth returning to my body, my heart beating normally once again.
My batman has returned. And I could feel him healing me.