Caught Up In Lucifer's Eyes

Kabanata 3

Refuge

I once wondered how much the world despised me. Kung bakit ba ganoon na lang ang galit ng mundo sakin at lagi nitong kinukuha ang mga mahal ko sa buhay.

How the life of others seem so easy and simple. Pero sa akin, napakakumplikado ng lahat. I have endured so much silent wars I fought with myself. Siguro totoo ngang malas ako.

I still stay positive in spite of pain, yes. But sometimes, there's still the point when we get tired of enduring everything. Darating rin sa puntong ubos na ubos na ako.

Namulat akong napakalalim ng hininga. Malakas ang pintig ng puso sa dibdib at hinahabol ang sarili. Para akong nalunod sa isang napakalalim na dagat at ngayon lang aahon. Parang namatay ako nang ilang taon at ngayon lang narevive.

The soft mattress of the bed seem to comfort my wounded body. Nanghihina akong bumangon at halos walang lakas ang sarili.

The place was surrounded with walls  painted in cream white. Sumisilip ang sinag ng araw sa mga nagliliparang kurtina. Even the loose curls of my hair flew with the air.

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang mapagtantong iba na ang damit. Last time I remember, I wore a black blouse and jeans. And now, it's just a long white dress. What worse is... This is not even mine!

"You finally woke up..."

A stranger's baritone voice broke the silence of the whole place. His sudden voice awakened my senses.

I saw an unfamilliar man with his hands on the both of his pockets. He's wearing a black shirt and faded jeans.  Nakasandal ito sa kahoy na pintuang nakaharap sa kama.

His brows were furrowed. His lips were thin and cherry red. Magulo ang kanyang buhok, but when it stroke the light, it was such a piece of art. Mas halata ang kanyang kaputian sa itim na damit na kanyang suot.

The man's face was illuminated by the sun rays and the white walls of the place. He stared at me intently. Hindi ako nakakasiguro ng galit ba ito sakin o may nagawa ba akong mali. But, I was scared. Yumuko ako at itinago ang mukha sa kanya.

I loved mornings. Umaga ang pinakagusto ko sa isang buong araw. But now, maybe this is the most peculiar morning ever.

Mainit ang sikat ng araw pero nanlalamig ang katawan ko. Mas lalong nanghihina. I shivered in fear for some unknown reason. Kinagat ko ang labi at pinisil pisil ang mga daliri.

Tinignan ko ulit ang lalaki nang unti-unti itong lumakad patungo sa akin.

One step and all the memories flooded in. Sa isang kurap ng mata ay nagbalik sa alaala ko ang mga lalaking humahabol sa akin.

I saw their dirty glances, the inhumane way they called me, the way they chased me and ran like crazy, untamed wolves. Kung papaano ang mga halakhak nila at malademonyong mga mata habang hinahabol ako. Kung papaano ako naubusan nang hininga, makalayo lang sa kanila. Kung papaanong sa kadiliman at katahimikan ng gabi, kamuntikan nang babuyin ang pagkatao ko at bawian ako ng buhay.

I covered my face with my palms as I cried heavily. Nag-uumapaw ang takot sa akin. Binabaliw ako sa kaba at lakas ng kabog ng dibdib.

"Diyan ka lang! Huwag kang lalapit sakin!" Sigaw ko.

Nanginginig ang buong katawan kong nanlalamig. I punched my chest repeatedly as I gasped for air. I felt the weakness of my body. I knew how much vulnerable and fragile I was, right now.

"Calm down, young lady. I am not trying to hurt you..."

He stopped at his last step. Pinanatili ang distansya sa aming dalawa. I looked at him and his eyes were still the same, ruthless and merciless.