Absolute Chaos (Dick Grayson)

CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR

omg guys this is so long. I am so sorry. also, I am sorry for this being three days later than promise, don't hate me, it is here. I make no promises for the next one but school is on hold for...a while, lol, and online classes don't start for a while so im hoping I hammer out a lot in the next lil bit. 

so, this is a long one. drop comment! love those! there's some info dump, some foreshadowing, the usual. there are hints as always, but I think im unintentionally super vague with them so they haven't been obvious at all so hehhe. sorry.

I tried really hard to emphasize a lot of stuff happening so it feels kind of...spread thin? don't know how to better explain what I mean but yeah. there is also a lot of jess&dick, plus some development in her sibling relationship with roy that I am excited to get into because it is crucialllll.

so!! hopefully this satisfies. 

the end of the chapter is pretty feel-good. call this one and the next one the calm before the storm. also, as a lil warning ( don't know if its  something to warn rly but whatever), the next chapter is gonna be some time skipping. if I did all the recovery of a bad injury, that would be a novella. (i'd love to but I have a plot to deal with here people!)

COMMENT. vote too I suppose. 

thanks for sticking with this story btw. love y'all. stay safe.

PS it is 6 AM where I am right now so if there are edits I haven't made, don't judge too hard, just pointed out kindly and I will appreciate you!

"...stupid doing this..."

Heavy. Feels really heavy.

Fuck. Numb, too. Uncomfortable as shit.

And there's a beeping that keeps coming and going.

"...guess I should...needing to say something for...but I didn't and..."

Slowly, that's the trick. Do it slowly. Slowly breathe, slowly try and open your eyes. A stream of white, bright light hits her and no, no to that idea, never mind. Eyes closed.

"This is..." There's a sigh to her left. Also a weight next to her. To her other side. The right. Like...like a pressure. Pressure everywhere, really. "I feel so dumb. So, so fucking stupid. But also, like...guilty as shit because I'm a fucking cliche, just realizing all this now — realizing I was kind of..." A heavier sigh. "Fuck. Just stay alive, please, I would really appreciate a shot at - like - us, being less shitty to each other. A shot to, y'know... get over the bad blood and... Well. First you have to stay alive, so."

The pause is longer this time.

"I've been trying really hard to put — distance, I guess, between us. I liked just having my small circle. Just fucking...Dick and Wally and Ollie...Dinah was okay...you were just this fucking kid, though, not like them. They were my brothers but also my teammates but you were just this - this fucking idiot kid. And Ollie and Dinah like to say I have — I dunno, fucking abandonment issues or a complex or some shit — but I just hated worrying about someone else and I didn't want to be all...i didn't want a fucking little sister." He huffs. "Got one anyway, didn't I?"

Didn't want a big brother, either, but here we are, Jessica wants to say but she can hardly think above the cloud and cotton balls in her head. Shut up. Shut up. I'm not dead.