you, me and the universe

I Think I Still Love You

Hi! This may or may not be a sneak peek of my new upcoming book 🙈 I'll let yall's imagination run wild! 🙈

Songs you can listen to while reading this :

1) Be your everything by boys like girls

It was two in the morning, and Jinyoung and Jisoo were chilling by the Han River, on a bench. Just talking, it was a Friday night, and Jisoo can't seem to remember how they ended up here, the cool breeze hitting her face that night then took her back to reality.

"I feel like staying here until the sun rises.", Jinyoung said, glancing at Jisoo.

"What?", Jisoo said softly, it then came back to her how they would sneak out back in highschool to watch the sunset on the nearest rooftop, "Are you doing this on purpose?", Jisoo said, rhetorically as she swallowed, looking away. Jinyoung then chuckled lightly.

"So you remember?", Jinyoung said with a sad smile.

"How could I not? That was the last thing we did.", Jisoo said, tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, "Before you just ghosted me.", Jisoo said, almost in a whisper.

Jinyoung swallowed at that, because he did ghost her, left her hanging, but in his defense, it felt like Jisoo was the one who pushed him away, and of course deep down Jisoo acknowledged that but that did not stop her to feel like Jinyoung broke her heart. Because he did.

"I thought we were trying to move past this.", Jinyoung said quietly. Jisoo had agreed that they could try this again, and she had told herself to not make the same mistake—to not push him away. But after so long of being hurt, she could not just let it go, she still wanted him, but the hurt he left her with was overtaking her.

Jisoo had thought she was over him. Over all their memories. But being here with Jinyoung again, felt like somewhere between opening up an old wound and feeling like she was finally home again. She couldn't comprehend what she was feeling.

"Right. We are.", Jisoo nodded slightly, looking away from him, "But Jinyoung. Forgetting is a hard fight.", Jisoo said, standing up, Jinyoung following after her, "I had such a shitty senior year, Jinyoung. All my friends were busy mingling around, I was getting over a heartbreak.., getting over you.", Jisoo breathed.

Jisoo then looked up at him, hurt flashing through her eyes. Even in the dark, under a dim streetlight, Jinyoung could see the hurt in her eyes.

"And when I'm finally okay. Ready to just start things fresh..here I am..with you again, back to square one.", Jisoo inhaled, "So you need to understand why I'm so terrified.", Jisoo said, she then inhaled.

They then fell into silence.

"Maybe I'm not ready to try this again.", Jisoo said softly, breaking the silence, she then turned back, trying to walk away, hurt.

Jinyoung then pulled her by her arm, spinning her around, facing him.

"Wait. I'm really sorry Jisoo.", Jinyoung said, frustrated, not being able to form words. Jisoo pulled her arm away from Jinyoung's hold, she the  looked up at Jinyoung, and a feeling of tenderness swept through her, but she then told herself—push it aside.

"You dropped me. With no explanations. And you went back to someone who broke your heart. What on earth were you thinking? You didn't even think to find me. Did I not cross your mind at all?", Jisoo said, her voice cracking, eyes glassy.

"Jisoo..", Jinyoung tried, coming out in an almost whisper, he felt her slipping away.

"I think I still love you, Jinyoung.", she said softly cutting him off, and for a moment that gave Jinyoung hope, "..and I don't like that.", Jisoo added, and he felt his heart ached at those words.

"Sorry.", Jisoo said, pulling away from Jinyoung's hold and turning around, walking away, and Jinyoung stood there, dumbfounded and heartbroken, watching her walk away from him.

Maybe I just lost you for good. Jinyoung thought.

Jisoo walked back to her apartment, tears slipping. She hugged herself as she walked through the chilly and breezy night. Tears continued to slip as she walked, she wondered why was it so hard to let Jinyoung in again, for so long that was what she wanted. But now that he's right in front of her, she found herself making the same mistake again.

Millions of thoughts were running through her head.

Maybe it's just not meant to be. I'll forget about him. It was not love. What we had wasn't love. We could never last forever.

She continued to walk home in tears with these thoughts hoping to find comfort in them, and when she reached her floor, her head clouded as she got off the elevator, she then thought—maybe this is the end of our story, Jinyoung. maybe this is closure.—and Jisoo reached her doorstep, with that being the last thought running through her head.

maybe this is closure.

~End

A/N :

HIIIII!!! so what do u think of this sneak peek🙈 (yes its a sneak peek,just a little surprise for u guys😙) What do u guys think? Also I kind of wanna tell u guys what characters will be in the book but idk 🤔🙈

I rly cant wait to write and talk to u guys again! 🥺💕

p/s : i also may or may not have another small surprise for u guys regarding this upcoming book! 🙉 ill give it to u when i start publishing in july mwah💕

Love, A 🦋