The Beloved Izabel

Last time

July 13, 1574

It has been a couple days since I've told Lorenzo that he did not have permission to marry Emilia. Emilia has not yet confronted me about the whole situation. They both have not said a word to me.

I look up at my ceiling and remind myself that today is a new and better day. Margot is preparing a bath while Claude prepares my meals. "Your majesty, your bath is ready." I undress myself and make my way to my bath. "Claude, tell me, have you spoken to Emilia?" Claude looks down as if she doesn't want to say anything. "Your majesty, Emilia has told me that even without your blessing she will marry him and bear his children. She believes she's already with child." I look up at Claude and I'm sure you can tell by the expressions on my face that Claude regrets what she said. I stand up and Margot rushes to my side and starts to dry me off. I step out of the tub and walk to my dresser to decide what to wear. I really can't believe it. She might be pregnant with his child. I hear Margot and Claude whispering, "why did you tell her! this is going to devastate her." Margot tells Claude. I have to see Emilia.

After Margot and Claude have helped me get into my gown, I dismiss them. I need some time to think. I go to my jewelry box and open it up and look around to see what I should wear. Of course my engagement ring and my ring that shows I'm Queen. I have many other jewels that I've had since I was a child. My grandmother would always have me wear the best jewels. I see my beautiful gold headband with pearls that was given to me by my aunt Claude. I decide I will wear that since it matches with my gown. I'm wearing a black and gold gown with detached sleeves and tulle skirt.

I decide to go see James for a bit, he's been riding his horse as of lately. He absolutely loves riding. Claude and Margot accompany me down to the stables. As we walk towards the stables, I see Lorenzo and James together. Lorenzo is helping James get on his horse. Watching them both, makes my heart flutter. He's going to be a great father. Thinking about him having children with a person that isn't me, absolutely destroys me. But I chose this, I chose to push him away.

"James!" I call his name as we get closer, and they both turn to look at me. They both curtsy, but it seems James is the only one happy to see me. His face lights up and he runs to me, but as for Lorenzo, he hasn't looked me in the eye. James gives me a big hug, one that I've needed. I hug him back and play with his hair. "I wanted to see you, how are you brother?" he looks up at me with those big, beautiful eyes. "I've been great, your majest- I mean sister. I've been riding and I'm learning how to play the harp." he lets go of me and grabs my hand and pulls me towards his horse where Lorenzo is standing. "Your majesty." Is all Lorenzo says. "This is Belle, and I love her so much." James tells me, I pet his beautiful horse and can feel Enzo's eyes on me. I look up at him and he looks away. "Well James, I just wanted to see you today. I have some important things to do, but I will see you later." I kiss his forehead, and they both curtsy as I leave.

As I'm walking back all I think about is that Lorenzo is possibly going to be a father I want to speak to him so badly but I'm not sure if he even wants to hear what I want to say. I think it's finally time for me to speak to Emilia. "I think I'm going to speak to Emilia." I tell Margot and Claude, "Your majesty, are you sure." I nod and make my way inside to look for her. As I'm looking for her all I can think about is whether she hates me or not. She has been my best friend since we were babes and I'm not sure if I'm ready to lose her. I've lost Lorenzo already; I definitely don't want to lose Emilia.

I make my way to her chambers which is on the other side of the castle. If I can save this friendship that's what I'm going to do. Emilia has been with me my whole entire life and I can't hate her for being with Lorenzo. He is not my husband and they both can do as they please. I just hope it's not too late to save our friendship. As I'm finally approaching her chambers, I take a deep breath in. Izabel, you must do the right thing. I knock before I go in, "Enter." I hear Emilia say. I open the door and walk in; she's sitting at the window. When she hears the door close, she turns around. She looks at me and quickly gets up, "Your majesty, I was not expecting you. How may I help you." I sit down at her desk and move my engagement ring around my finger. I do this whenever I'm nervous.

"Emilia, I'm sorry for all the pain I've caused you. If you are happy with Lorenzo and wish to marry him, I will allow him to marry you. I just want my friend back." She looks down at the floor and I can see the tear roll down her cheek. "Iz, you have to understand that I never meant to hurt you. I know you loved him and what I did was so selfish. But I really do care him." I guess that's all I needed to hear. She really does love him. I love him too. "Emilia I will allow you to get married to Lorenzo, I just want you to be happy." Her bright eyes open and she runs over to me and gives me the biggest hug. We both laugh and hug each other. I've missed her. "Thank you so much Iz, I love you." I think it's time for me to retire to my chambers. I've been feeling pretty exhausted lately. "I'm feeling quite exhausted Em, I think it's time for me to go to bed." I'm about to open her door, "I'm pregnant." she tells me. I turn around and look at her and she has the biggest smile on her face and is crying even more. She's pregnant. I fake the biggest smile I can, "Congrats Em." Before I know it I'm running to my chambers, tears have filled my eyes. I'm down the hall from my chamber, when I bump into someone and fall back. I look up and it's Enzo. Just my luck. "Izabel, are you alright? I wasn't paying attention. I Apologize." He puts his hand out so that I can grab it. I grab his hand and he pulls me up, close enough that our bodies are touching. I back away and continue to walk to my chamber. "You've been crying." he says and I turn around, "It's is none of your business." He walks with me to my chamber, "Enzo, I am fine. Please just go." he doesn't listen to me and when I go inside my chamber, he follows me.

"You shouldn't be in here." I tell him and he gets closer to me. "Why have you been crying?" I look away and start to take my jewelry off. "Enzo please! It hurts too much." he spins me around, "Izabel, tell me what hurts!!" I push him and continue to hit his chest, "YOU. ITS YOU. you hurt me!!" he grabs my hands and pulls them close to his chest and embraces me. "I have done nothing but love you." He motions my chin to look up at him and he kisses me. For just one moment I forget who I am. I kiss him back. This can't happen. I won't let it. I pull away, "We can't do this!! I'm going to be married soon, and you... you're going to be a father!" he looks hurt, like he didn't want me to know. "Who told you?" I walk away and look outside and see nothing but darkness, "Emilia did. We talked. Congratulations, your going to be a father and husband." I look at him and I want him to see my face because this is it. I cannot let him control my emotions. He looks surprised, "You're letting us get married?" I nod and he seems astounded. "Now, please go." he looks like he wants to say something but instead he just leaves.

I remove my gown and put my night gown on. I get into my silk covers and look up at my ceiling. You will be happy Izabel. You will have children with Sebastian. You will both live a happy life. I continue to tell myself until I finally fall asleep.

Izabels gown ✨

Her headband ✨