By The Pond - A Lams Story

Chapter 14

-John's Perspective-

   John yawns and climbs out of bed, changing into some normal clothes and heading to the main part of the apartment where Alex is still sleeping. He smiles at the man who is curled up under his weighted blanket because lord knows he tried to get away from Alex's sleepy grip last night and failed, so he let him borrow his weighted blanket instead.
   John walks over to Alex and lightly shakes him. "Hey, Lex, wake up." He watches as Alex opens his eyes and immediately looks around, trying to get a grip of where he is. John makes a small noise to get his attention, and as John meets his gaze, John notices the tension leak out of his shoulders. Good.
   "How are you feeling?" John sits next to Alex as he stretches and slides the blanket off of him just a bit.
   "Good. Definitely better than last night. Thanks." He yawns.
   "Of course. Anxiety attacks aren't any fun when you're by yourself." John murmurs. "I would offer you some better clothes, but I don't know if I have any that would fit you better than that."
   "It's fine." Alex fingers the sleeves of the hoodie. "These work."
   "Okay." John nods. "Do you want something to eat? I'm sure I could make something for you, and I might have some coffee from when the guys come over."
   "You don't have to do anything for me. I'm the Knight, and my duty is to serve you, not the other way around..." Alex sighs, looking at the ground.
   "Hey." John scoots closer to him, and lifts his chin up so that he's looking him in the eye. "You can't protect me if you're not okay, either." Alex blushes, and John suddenly realizes how close their faces are. And their lips.  He immediately scoots back and feels his heart hammering in his chest. What was that? What was that? Was I about to- No. Nope. Not even close. You're just taking care of a friend. That's it. That's the only thing happening here. Nothing else. John feels his face rapidly heating up and goes over to the kitchen area. "So. Do you want anything to eat or to drink?"
   "Whatever you want to make me is fine, I guess. I don't have any allergies. But maybe I could have some hot cocoa...?" Alex asks hesitantly.
   "Sure. And of course. Cocoa is the second best thing in the world." Although it might be the third... Wait a second. Where did that come from? No. Bad John. Just friends. Just friends! He gets some eggs out of the fridge and ignores his heated cheeks. "Scrambled eggs sound okay?"
   "Yeah."
   "Cool." John sets a mug under where the hot water is and cooks the eggs, getting the cocoa when it's done and stirring it. He then plops a candy cane in it and hands the cup to Alex. "Careful. It's hot." Just like- Nope. Stop it! John Henry Laurens, what the heck are you doing?
   Alex nods and sets it down as John finishes cooking the eggs. John puts them on some plates and walks over to the island where Alex has seated himself. He slides to plate over to the other man and sits down, eating quietly and trying to get his thoughts- and hormones- to chill.
   "Thank you again for last night." Alex says,. "And this morning. I don't normally get myself stranded outside when a storm's coming. I was just- distracted, I guess."
   "It's fine. Panic and anxiety attacks aren't fun, and you needed the help. I just happened to be the person who helped you. Anyone would've." John shrugs.
   "Not everyone would. Some people freeze and don't know how to help. So thank you." Alex pauses. "When I was seventeen, a hurricane destroyed my town. I survived, but I watched everyone and everything around me get ripped to shreds by high-speed winds and sheets of rain. I'm not entirely sure how I survived. And sometimes, I don't know why I survived and why the others around me didn't. But any time it storms really badly, I get flashbacks, and it's hard to differentiate the present from the past, exactly if I get stuck outside. And while it acts like a panic attack or an anxiety attack, it's actually different." He explains.
   "Mm." John nods. "Alright. I'm glad you felt you could trust me with that." He goes quiet, sipping at his cocoa. That sounds awful. "I actually have anxiety, so while it's probably a bit different, I can kind of understand where you're coming from. Anytime I get extremely overwhelmed, I just kinda stop functioning and nothing feels right. I have to make a list or write things down to get a grip on the things that are flying at me just so that I remember all of them."
   Alex makes a small noise of acknowledgement and finishes his eggs. "Thank you for breakfast. And for last night. I really do appreciate it."
   "Of course, Lex. If you ever need anything, I've got you. Pinky promise." John holds out his pinky, and Alex holds out his, and they interlock their pinkies for a second.
   "I'll hold you to that." Alex smiles softly.
   "I would expect nothing less." John looks at the clock. "Wait, aren't you usually at work by now?"
   "Oh, shit, you're right!" He watches Alex fumble for his phone before calling his boss. "Hey, George..." John zones out because he doesn't want to intrude on Alex's business. That would be rude. And then he realizes he should call in sick.
   He dials Laf's number. "Hey, Laf, can you tell the boss I'm not coming in today?"
   "Sure, mon ami. May I ask why?"
   "I'm not feeling too well." John answers.
   "Alright. I hope you feel better soon." Lafayette doesn't sound convinced, but he hangs up.
   "I called in sick." Alex tells John. "But I should probably get going. Do you want your clothes back, or...?"
   "You can keep them for the moment, and then just give them back later. But I can grab your clothes for you really fast..." John goes to get them from the bathroom and hands them to him. "Here."
   "Thank you." John is suddenly extremely aware of how close they are. I could just.. Lean forward- What the heck, John? No!
   "You're welcome." John opens the door. "Do you want a ride home?"
   "Nah, it's fine. I could use the exercise." Alex shrugs. "And it's a bit wet outside, but the storm's gone, so I should be fine. Thank you, though." Alex seems to pause for a second and then almost imperceptibly shakes his head. "Bye, Freckles. And thank you." John watches Alex leave.
   Now why the FUCK did I want to kiss him?!?