The Saint Jones [Completed]

chapter 47: New Beginning

Cher

Dark sunglasses, again.

All the way to the port, I watched him secretly from the corner of my eyes. I mean, I cannot understand why he is wearing them again. Okay, no, let me rephrase; yes, I understand why he is wearing them, simply because he is not comfortable... yet, but I want him to be because he is a beauty, I cannot believe he decided to hide such perfection.

Anyway, the ride back to the port was this; silence. Verbal silence between him and I. Africa by Toto was playing in the radio, the driver has put it pretty loud, it was a wall between us.

I feel bad and through the whole ride of fifteen minutes I felt bad. I did not know why but I wanted to cry, I still want to cry. There is this foreboding in me that is telling me that things will be hard and tense back on the cruise, precisely, the current situation between us. I am not moronic and definitely not blind, I saw how it is difficult for him to live just a little bit and on the cruise, I cannot imagine how hard and troublesome this is going to be.

But I am desperately trying to stay calm and keep on thinking about what he told me, 'we will figure it out.' Of course we will figure it out, I want this to last, I want to experience and to live in his arms not matter the cost of it.

We are now standing in front of The Saint Jones, waiting for them to place the gangway so that we can get back on the cruise. The surrounding is packed of people who are waiting as well, they are loudly talking, laughing, everyone seems to have had a good time.

"You're okay?" I lift my head and come across his sunglasses. It is annoying knowing that I have seen the treasure behind them and that now I will have to do with what I have because of the eyes are others.

"Yes. You are?"

"Totally," he replies, his jaw clenching.

I know he is not okay, I am not either. Are we lying to each other? Yes, is this good for our relationship? No. But I do not think it is lying, it is more like; protecting, yes, we are protecting each other from something, something I cannot portray yet.

Suddenly, I feel something touching my fingers, I look down and find his fingers next to mine, asking for acceptance so he can entwines our fingers together. I look around us, thinking about what can be the outcomes of this gesture. Someone can see us, he will get in trouble.

"Do you think we can do this?" I ask with anxiety, eyes skimming around.

"It's okay, act normally," he utters, moves slightly behind me and slides his fingers into mine. We hold hands with so much of precautions. I feel a rush of excitement driving in me, this is shockingly exciting yet ridiculously scary.

The warm of his skin against mine is reassuring, I feel less alone and sad. My eyes roves around me, there are so many people, cannot count them. Suddenly, my eyes fall on him, the blond guy, the one who told me about Julian's feelings, he's walking up to us, clutching a bag on his shoulder.

His hair is absurdly shining under the sunlight, making it gold. He too is wearing sunglasses, a drab top with blue shorts, mixed with white slippers. I can clearly see the corner of his mouth lifting up as if he is saying something from afar. He knows I am looking at him.

"Oh my God, you're alive!" He says excitedly as soon as he arrives in front of us. Julian's fingers slide away from mine.

I look at him but retrieve myself from frowning at him and look back at this guy. He took his sunglasses off his face, now they are hanging on the chain around his red neck. He looks at me, smiles then he looks at Julian and pushes him to him so they can hug. Julian stumbles forward and fall in his arms as the guy wraps his strong arms around Julian's torso. They look like a couple who have not seen each other for years.