Heart of Ashes

As Yet Unbound

"Do not make promises when you do not understand what it is you are offering, what you are giving up. After all, you should not make promises lightly. Once a promise has been made, it is binding even after death, and if broken... the consequences can be far greater than any mere human would wish to pay," Ashe said, his voice having lowered until it seemed to almost slither through the room and into my ear.

Blinking at him, I tilted my head.

"Who says I'm not serious? I mean, if I go by what my ancestors believed or even what my own parents believe, I won't be missing that much. According to them, death is just returning to the energy of the universe or something like that," I said in a joking tone of voice, hoping that he would stop being so serious for a moment and just relax. All this stress couldn't be good for him, after all.

"And what about what you believe, (y/n). Do you believe your energy simply returns to the universe?" The way he looked at me made me pause for a moment to think, feeling like his eyes were looking straight into the center of my being. For some reason or another, I felt like my answer actually meant something to him.

"I... I believe that... I mean, it sounds kinda silly, but I believe we go wherever we believe we will go. If we believe we go to Heaven, we do, and if we believe we turn into energy, we can do that too. I think every belief is real, at least to that person, and as long as they believe it, then that is what will happen," I had started slowly, sounding unsure, but by the time I finished there had been a soft confidence to my voice.

"Ahh, as much as I like your answer, that still does not tell me what you believe," he said, the corners of his lips twitching up for a moment before his face went blank again. "I want to know what you believe will happen to your soul when you die. Do you not have someplace you wish to go afterward?"

Turning my head away to look at one of the photos of my family that sat on a shelf, I frowned slightly before answering.

"I don't really care where I go after I die, as long as I have someone there with me. As long as I have a friend, I don't care if I go someplace special or spend the rest of eternity sitting in a room. Of course, it would be nice if I could keep making things like I do now, but I think that as long as I wasn't alone, I'd be happy enough. It's strange, you know... before I met Rae, I didn't care if I had any friends. I was fine being alone, but now... now I don't think I could stand to be alone like that again. It's scary to think I could end up someplace by myself, nobody else to talk to, nobody else to care whether I exist or not. So no, I think I could quite happily spend forever with someone who doesn't seem to mind my company, even if you are a bit awkward at times. But that's just part of being human, right?" The grin I gave him was so big, I felt my eyes squeeze shut and began laughing as my hands came up to rub at my already sore cheeks.

"Is it? How... odd," he whispered, watching me as I made faces to try and relax the muscles in my cheeks.

~~~~~~~~

He couldn't tell what she meant by her words. Did she mean that being human meant happily sacrificing her afterlife for someone she'd barely met? Or that it meant being lonely, awkward, or perhaps seeking companionship even after death? There were certainly enough souls who had sought out family and friends in the afterlife, even going so far as to seek them out after one had been reborn. He'd never really understood why they would want to be reborn again and again, leaving him to keep reaping the same souls multiple times, but who was he to judge the strangeness of mortals?

Watching the female stretch her mouth wide in the midst of her facial contortions, Ashe felt his own lips try to curl up at the corners before he brought them to a halt. What a... strange human she was, bringing her warmth into his life and now making his own body try to do odd things in her presence. He'd seen humans smile at each other, but he'd never once felt the urge to do so in the past 6000 years. Not since...

Enough of those thoughts, he had wasted enough time drinking tea and listening to this female make promises she couldn't even begin to understand the repercussions of. And yet, she had made the promise... Was she now bound to it, like all those before who had bargained their words with him?

Was she... bound to him, once she died, once he came to reap her soul? Had she truly tied herself to him in such a manner? No, no, he had no time for such foolish thoughts. The bargain could only be struck in truth if she understood what she offered and even if she did, no doubt she would try to go back on such a deal. No, he wouldn't get his hopes up over words offered thoughtlessly and without intent.

He would not become attached just to watch her slip from his grasp like those who had come so long before her.

"Are you okay? You look... sad," she said as he almost flinched at the warm fingers that had pressed momentarily against his cheek before slipping down to fall once more at her side, leaving trails of heat on his cool skin.

Bringing a hand up, he stopped moments before touching his skin himself, lowering the hand slowly and turning his head toward the door.

"I should go. I have work that needs to be completed before the paperwork starts building up again. I will be back in a few days to see how the clothing is coming along. If anything needs to be fitted by then, it would be acceptable to do so," he spoke slowly before nodding at the female and walking toward the door.

"Oh... Oh! Wait!" The female shouted, rushing over to the table and grabbing a pen and paper. Quickly scribbling something down, she rushed over to him again and grabbed his hand, curling his fingers over the note she'd written. "Here's my number. Call before you come over and I can make sure everything is ready for you! I can even have some tea and cookies ready for your visit!"

Looking down at his hand, her fingers almost burning against his skin before they dropped away once more, he slid his hand into the pocket of his slacks.

"Of course... Yes, I'll call you," he mumbled, wondering if Azrael could explain the concept to him.

Perhaps it had something to do with one of the machines he'd seen a few decades ago? He was sure the Fallen could help with this... if they weren't still too upset with him. Otherwise, he wasn't sure who would be best to go to, since most of the gods and goddesses were even more out of the loop than he was.

"Bye, Ashe. Thanks for visiting," her soft voice carried across the room as he opened the door and slipped into the hallway.

Looking back, he caught the smile that curved her lips gently upward, burning it into his mind just as the door closed between them. He couldn't help wondering if maybe, just maybe, he could somehow convince her that he really was who he said he was without having to reap her soul to do so.

And that maybe the idea of spending eternity with him, with Death, wouldn't be such a bad way to spend her afterlife.