Red vs Blue Season 1 /w Spartan Matthias

Rvb S1 Ep1 "Why are we here?"

Somwhere on desert planet, far away from anything, there's a Canyon named Blood Gulch. In this Canyon, there are two opposing forces. On one side, stands Blue Base, while on the other, stands Red Base. 

On the top of Red base, there are two soldiers just standing around, doing nothing. One of them wears maroon armor, and goes by the name Simmons. The other one beside him is a fatass wearing orange armor, and calls himself Grif.

After what seems like forever, Simmons finally turns towards Grif  in order to try and start a converstation.

Simmons: Hey.

Grif turns towards Simmons.

Grif: Yeah?

Simmons: You ever wonder why we're here?

Grif: It's one of life's great mysteries isn't it? Why are we here? I mean, are we the product of some cosmic coincidence, or is there really a God watching everything? You know, with a plan for us and stuff. I don't know, man, but it keeps me up at night.

Both stare at each other in akward silence.

Simmons: ...What?! I mean why are we out here, in this canyon?

Grif: Oh. Uh... yeah.

Simmons: What was all that stuff about God?

Grif: Uh...hm? Nothing.

Simmons: You wanna talk about it?

Grif: No.

Simmons: You sure?

Grif: Yeah.

Simmons: Seriously though, why are we out here? As far as I can tell, it's just a box canyon in the middle of nowhere. No way in or out.

Grif: Mm hmm.

Simmons: The only reason that we set up a Red Base here, is because they have a Blue Base over there. And the only reason they have a Blue Base over there, is because we have a Red Base here.

Grif: Yeah. That's because we're fighting each other.

Simmons: No, no. But I mean, even if we were to pull out today, and if they would come take our base, they would have two bases in the middle of a box canyon. Whoopdee-fucking-doo.

Grif: What's up with that anyway? I mean, I signed on to fight some aliens. Next thing I know, Master Chief and The Grey Ghost blows up the whole Covenant armada and I'm stuck in the middle of nowhere, fighting a bunch of blue guys.

Change the scene to three soldiers watching Grif and Simmons from atop a cliff, one wielding a sniper rifle and in cobalt armor, Church, the other standing behind him in aqua armor, Tucker. The third one, who's the nearest to the cliffside is wearing a weird looking gray armor with some blue stripes oit, and holds a futuristic looking sniper rifle. He calls himself Matthias.

Tucker: What're they doing?

Church slowly turns around to face Tucker, lowering his rifle. Matthias ignores them, and continues observing the Reds.

Church: (aggravated) What?

Tucker: I said, "What are they doing now?"

Church: (frustrated) God damn, I'm getting so sick of answering that question!

Tucker: (defensively) You two have the fucking rifles, I can't see shit. Don't bitch at me because I'm not going to just sit up here and play with my dick.

Church: (interrupting) Okay, okay, look... they're just standing there and talking, okay? (getting angry) That's all they're doing. That's all they ever do, is just stand there and talk. That's what they were doing last week, that's what they were doing when you asked me five minutes ago. So, five minutes from now, when you ask me, "What are they doing?" my answer's gonna be, "They're still just talking, and they're still just standing there!"

Both fall silent.

Matthias: ...Are you guys done yet?

Church: *sigh* Yes. ...for now.

Matthias: Good.

The three of them goes back to observing the Reds. A few moments later...

Tucker: ...What're they talking about?

Matthias: *heavy sigh*

Church: You know what? I fucking hate you.

Matthias: *thought* Next time, I'll come alone. These two just won't stop bickering.

Back to Grif and Simmons, who are still talking.

Grif: Talk about a waste of resources. I mean, we should be out there finding new and intelligent forms of life... you know, fight them.

Simmons: Yeah, no shit. That's why they should put us in charge.

At the front of the base, a soldier in red armor, named Sarge, is seen looking up at Simmons and Grif.

Sarge: Ladies, front and center on the double!

Simmons: Fuck.

Grif: Yes, sir!

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That's the first chapter done! I'll try to upload a few more today, so stay tuned for those!