tuggoffelees oneshots

fourty two: soulmate au

     hi i found a soulmate au that's really simple but wow. basically, you have the first thing you soulmate will say to you tattooed on your wrist. person a has "fuck you!!" and person b has something like "SO YOURE THE MOTHERFUCKER WHO GAVE ME THE WORST MARK IN ALL OF HISTORY!! THERES NOTHING WORSE THAN HAVING THE WORDS 'fuck you!!' PLASTERED ON YOU FOR TWENTY YEARS"

     as i was saying, it's adorable. i promise.

misto pov
     i pull my right sleeve further down my wrist, trying desperately to hide the words 'fuck you!' once i find my soulmate i swear to god. what kind of sane person says 'fuck you!' to a stranger?
     i walk briskly in the dry autumn air, passing small stores and such.
     after what feels like an eternity, but is really only three minutes, i reach my favourite coffee shop. i smile to myself and push the door open.
     but the door doesn't open all the way. it collides with something quite solid. i peer through the glass to find i hit someone with the door.
     "fuck you!!" he curses.
     "oh sor— oh so yoURE THE BASTARD THAT THE UNIVERSE DECIDED WAS GOING TO SAY 'fuck you!' TO ME! THERES NOTHING WORSE THAN HAVING THE WORDS "fuck you!!" TATTOOED ON YOU FOR TWENTY YEARS!"
     by now, the entire shop is staring at us, but i couldn't care less. i am livid.
     "well, imagine having that entire-ass essay written- in all caps- down your whole forearm." he says, pulling up his sleeve to show me. he was right, the inside of his forearm is stained with my words.
     i've probably gone three different shades of red throughout this entire exchange. "sorry." is all i can muster.
     he smiles cockily. "my names tugger. you?"
     "mistoffelees."
     he chuckles. "well, mistoffelees, can i get you a coffee?"

     hi tysm for reading. do you sweethearts want me to continue with the soulmate au's or... (if you want, you can send me ideas!!)