7| The Meat and Potatoes of It

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"So you're getting married?" He asks, furrowing his brows

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"So you're getting married?" He asks, furrowing his brows.

"No, you are," I joke and then I realize he can't remember the entire story of the ranch. I steamroll past the topic and decide to congratulate him on his purchase like a normal human being in my current situation would do."Congratulations, by the way." He nods, the spoon still in his mouth. I look away from him and sourly take another bite of my ice cream, it no longer tasted as good as it did before.

"I gotta run, I told Eliza I'd stop by," I say, standing up to reach for my purse. He stands up straight and walks me to the door, taking my jacket off the hook he holds it open for me to wear, like a true county boy. My chest squeezes imagining him doing that for some other woman. I slide my arms through the sleeves and feel his thumb at the base of my neck. His thumb was warm but the heat from his breath was warmer. Despite that heat, I shivered, I couldn't do this. I snapped out of it, and propelled myself out the door in a fashion that I only hoped would not hurt his feelings.

"Thanks for the cookies." He shouts when I reach my car.

"No problem," I shout back, trying my best to keep my voice steady. I start the engine and reverse out of the driveway. It takes everything in me not to stop the car and ask whether or not he was going to ask me out on a date.


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"You're late!" She says as she opens the door, her hair tied up in the usual messy bun of pregnancy and still comfortably dressed in pyjamas. "You didn't bring the cookies!" She pouts, shoulders slouched and arms down at her side.

"Sorry! I must have forgotten, my mind is all over the place." I lie, deciding not to tell her they had gone to the stomach of my ex-boyfriend.

"I probably shouldn't be eating them anyways." She sighs as leads me towards the couch. Liza plops down and twists her body as best as she can to face me, "How's your mom doing?" I give her the whole spiel I gave Ryan and catch myself frowning at the thought of him. "I know that face, what's going on?" She whispers, her eyes filled with concern.

"I'm supposed to be getting married." I start, looking away from her widening eyes, "my boyfriend back home proposed."

"Let me guess, you don't want to get married?" she grabs a hold of my hand and I start to cry.

"Is it that obvious?" I ask, pawing furiously at the tears that won't stop falling, "He was there for me through a lot of the pain I had after leaving, I guess he caught feelings and I just couldn't." I throw up my hands. In the three years I had been away from home, I hadn't told a soul about my unstable feelings.

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