★ ɴᴏᴛ sᴏ ʜᴀᴘᴘʏ ᴄᴀᴍᴘᴇʀs: ᴘᴀʀᴛ ᴏɴᴇ ★

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"Yo! We're coming at you live from Camp Wawanakwa, somewhere in Muskoka, Ontario. I'm your host, Chris Mclean. Dropping season one of the hottest new reality show on television, right now! Here's the deal, 24 campers have signed up to spend eight weeks right here at this crummy old summer camp. They'll compete in challenges against each other. Then have to face the judgment of their fellow campers. Every three days, one team will either win a reward or watch one of their team member's walk down the dock of shame. Take a ride on the loser boat and leave Total Drama Island, for good."

"Their fate will be decided here, at the dramatic campfire ceremonies where each week, all but one camper will receive a marshmallow. In the end, only one will be left standing and will be rewarded with cheesy tabloid fame and a small fortune, which let's face it, they'll probably blow in a week. To survive, they'll have to battle. Black flies. Grizzly bears. Disgusting camp food!"

"Hey now."

"And each other. Every moment will be caught on one of the hundreds of cameras situated all over the camp. Who will crumble under the pressure? Find out here right now on... Total Drama Island."

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"Welcome back to Total Drama Island. All right, it's time to meet our first 12 campers. We told them they'd all be staying at a five-star resort, so if they seem a little T.O.ed, that's probably why." Chris explained, "Beth, what's up?"

"It's so incredulous to meet you!" Beth exclaimed, "Wow, you're much shorter in real life." Beth walked off.

"Uh, thanks. D.J!"

"Yo, Chris Mclean. How's it going? Hey, you sure you got the right place here? Where's the hot tub at?" D.J. asked.

"Yo, dawg, this is it. Camp Wawanakwa."

"Humph. Looked a lot different on the application form." D.J. walked over to the other end of the dock by Beth.

"Hey, Gwen."

"You mean we're staying here?" Gwen asked.

"No, you're staying here. My crib is an airstream with A.C. That-a-way."

"I did not sign up for this." The goth scoffed.

Chris pulled a stack of papers out of nowhere, "Actually, you did." Gwen took the papers out of Chris' hands and tore them to shreds, "The great thing about lawyers is... they make lots of copies."

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