Stuck In Quarantine

19.

      It was just after twelve in the afternoon, when they finished brunch. Celeste was busy cleaning their dishes at the sink. And James was outside on the balcony. He was watching over the empty street, and the other apartment. Every balcony, had someone out on it, enjoying the weather. It was a very warm afternoon, it almost felt like summertime weather. Even the occasional gust of wind that blew, was warm.
      A couple occupants waved to James from their balcony, and he waved back. But other than that, James just stood, leaning against the railing. Losing himself in deep thought. He knew Stacy would be home in six days. And he wasn't looking forward to dealing with that. And he was also thinking about his time spent with, Celeste. He was wondering how things would be, between them, when the quarantine ended. He wanted to be with her, but he had his doubts.
      They had really gotten to know eachother, these past few days. He knew about her wanting to go university, and the SAT's and ACT's. He knew about her ex, her past jobs, how highschool was for her. And they spoke very little about her family. It seemed like it was a touchy subject. She was kicked out when she was sixteen for drugs, marijuana, of all things. And she had never been close with them since, which James couldn't blame her.
And she knew about James. His run in with the law, with his fighting, vandalism, and the time he broke into his old school. She knew about him growing up poor, and how because he was poor, it caused him to get bullied everyday at school. Which is why he got into fighting, and writing. The fighting was too survive, and the writing was his way to escape his real life. And they spoke about his family. Which whom he wasn't close with, like Celeste. And the abuse him and his mother went through, with her one boyfriend. He went through that for twelve years, from when he was a child, till he was fourteen. He never knew his real father, he left when he was little. And the only father figure he had, was a man his mother started dating, when he was sixteen. And the two of them, have been together ever since.

****

      The entire time James was lost in thought. He had no idea that Celeste had been standing behind him, watching the whole time. She was standing at the entrance to the balcony, drying her hands off. She didn't want to disturb him. She could tell he was deep in thought. She flipped the towel over her right shoulder when she was done, and crossed her arms, as she leaned against the frame of the sliding door. The frame creaked.
James turned around, and nearly jumped off the balcony.

      "Jesus! You scared me!" James said, clutching his chest, as he caught his breath.

      "I'm sorry! I didn't mean too" she replied. Laughing from the look on his face.

James took a deep breath, as he composed himself. 

      "You should have seen the look on your face!" She said, trying to contain her laughter. She was buckled over, from laughing so hard.

James couldn't help but laugh along with her.

      "Warn me next time! Or wear a damn bell!" He said.

      "I will! I just didn't want to disturb you, you looked so deep in thought." She replied.  Standing up straight again, wiping away tears. "What were you thinking about?"

      "Just some things."

      "Some things? Like what things? " She asked.

      "Just some things." James said, with a shoulder shrug.

      Celeste look at him confused, tilting her chin up, giving him a quick nod. She wasn't leaving without a proper answer, and James knew that. He had no choice, but to finally give in and tel her. He leaned his back against the railing, and crossed his arms. The look on Celeste's face, had, waiting, written all over it.

      "I was just thinking about, what'll happen when this virus ends. And dealing with Stacy, and stuff..." He said. Leaving out the part about Celeste.

      "What do you mean?" She asked. As she copied him, and crossed her arms.

      "Like, how things will be in general, when stuff goes back to normal."

Celeste squinted her eyes, and looked at him hard. Trying to figure out where he was going with this.

      "Like, with me and you? Or?" She asked.

      "Yes. I mean no... I mean! I don't know, to be honest..."

      "What do you mean, you don't know?"

      "Like this?!" James said. As he motioned his arms back and forth, to himself and her. "Like I don't want this to be a rebound, or anything..."

      "Then don't make it one!" She fired back. Confusion, and tension covered her face. "Only you can make it a rebound! I don't know about you, but I'm willing to try, and see where this goes."

James took a deep breath, and looked down at his feet. Feeling defeated.

      "It's just..." He spoke softly, "I've tried to do the whole dating thing, right after a breakup... And it never worked out for me..."

       "So you aren't even willing to try?" She asked. Annoyance in her voice.

      "I don't know... I want too... It's just, you know?" He said. Looking up at her.

      "Because of your past!" She fired back.

      James dropped his head again, after she spoke. He was rubbing his left elbow with his right hand. Feeling anxious, over the whole situation. Celeste took a deep breath, and tilted her head back. She couldn't tell if she was, annoyed, angry, or more hurt than anything. Silence hung between them for a few seconds. Before Celeste finally spoke.

      "I understand where you're coming from James... I really do! But if you can't get past things, that happened in your past. Then this won't work out... We're how old? That rebound shit, is highschool stuff..."

James didn't say a word. He looked up at Celeste, nodded in agreement, and put his head back down.

      "I think you should go..." She softly said.

      James looked up at her, bite his lower lip, and nodded again, in agreement. He stood up straight, and walked to Celeste. She stepped to the side, to let him leave. He stopped as he passed her, he wanted to say something. But the words wouldn't leave his mouth. He left the apartment. And Celeste stood there, feeling hurt, over the matter. She entered her apartment, and slammed the sliding door closed. Throwing the towel from her shoulder, to the kitchen, and walked to her bedroom.