kicks ✓ || namgi || k.th

016: pills

chapter 16: pills
location: st. louis, missouri, day 2

The next morning, Yoongi realized his pills were missing. He searched his entire bag for the extra bottle he had gotten from the pharmacy before leaving New York City, but it wasn't in there.

"Joon," he said, shoving his friend awake in the other bed. "Joon, I got a problem."

"Hmm?" Namjoon turned in his sleep, opening his sleepy eyes. "Oh, Yoongi. Hello, beautiful stranger."

Yoongi felt his face flush. Now was not the time for that! "No, no, Joon. I can't find my pills."

It took a moment to sink in, but then Namjoon was throwing off the covers. He (thankfully) had a shirt on. "Yoongi. Where were they last?"

"I don't know, I --" Yoongi already felt the tears coming. "I looked all through my bag and I couldn't find them. I'm sorry."

"Sit here by Hoseok, and I'm gonna look, okay?" Namjoon pulled Yoongi onto the bed and sat him down, then went over to their bag collection. It was super early in the morning. There wasn't even sunlight coming in through the hotel window yet. The boys in the other room weren't awake. Hoseok was still out, but probably not for much longer with the amount of noise Namjoon was making.

Yoongi sat still and stared straight ahead at the floor. Nobody in Korea knew he was on depression medication. His parents had no clue. He hadn't bothered to tell them. It would just make him look like more of a failure. They had been so mad at him for focusing on his music instead of his grades, until he had gotten a full ride overseas as a performance student. Now they were so proud of him, and he couldn't let them down.

And of course he had arrived at Columbia and slept through his classes. Thankfully, a fellow student had recognized the signs and helped Yoongi see a doctor. As a student at Columbia, he had to pay extra for health insurance, but it covered all of his medication while he was in America.

In America.

The first reason he didn't want to go back to Korea was so he wouldn't have to leave the family he had made. The second was because his scripts wouldn't matter overseas. He would have to go see a completely different doctor, get a new script, probably for a different drug. He would have to start all over. And customs would probably confiscate his current meds at the border.

It scared the shit out of him.

"Yoongi," Namjoon hissed, and Yoongi turned. Namjoon was sitting on the floor, the contents of Yoongi's bag all about him. He was holding up a little orange pill bottle. "It got tangled up in one of your shorts."

"Oh, my God." Yoongi got off the bed and grabbed the bottle from him. "Thank you, I --"

"Stop scaring the shit out of me like that, man! Do you need a glass of water?"

"I don't know." Yoongi felt bad. It always felt like Namjoon was taking care of him when he was down. Even with the meds, his depression wasn't magically fixed. There would be days that he would do nothing but sleep, and Namjoon was always talking to professors for him and making sure he got his classwork in.

Before Yoongi could protest anymore, Namjoon was sitting by him, with a glass of water in his hands. "Take your pill. That the first one of your new bottle?"

"Yeah." Yoongi took his pill.

"How many are in there again?"

"Ninety -- I got a three month supply. It was the most they would give me. It's supposed to last over the summer. Namjoon, what am I gonna do, I can't just go to a pharmacy and get a new script while we're running away, they'll know it's me and --"

"I will make it work." And Namjoon gave Yoongi a hug, not one of those bro hugs that he was always giving the others, but an honest to goodness hug to try and make him feel better. Yoongi was the only person he ever gave those to.

Yoongi did his best to dry his tears. The problem was solved, at least for now. "Why are you always taking care of me?"

"Who said I was taking care of you? I'd do it for anybody. But also, sometimes people just need a little help with things. Remember: when I get back to Korea, I'll be the future president of a huge company. And I'm going to use that influence to help those I love." Aw, shit, he used the L word. "Including my family." There. Safe for now. "If that means finding a very illegal way to get you your drugs, then so be it."

Yoongi laughed and shook his head. "You're something."

"And you're not worthless. Come on, if you're up, we might as well get everybody up. Where were we headed today?"

"Some amusement park or something. I think Hobi will want to stay in bed forever." Hobi had once puked on the Coney Island Cyclone while working at the boardwalk one summer. He was not a fan of roller coasters.

"Well, let's go make the others happy, and then we'll find something super chill to do tomorrow wherever we land, okay? Maybe we'll even stay in the hotel room all night watching Blockbuster movies."

"As long as I don't have to watch Titanic again, I'm good. Oh, wait! Can we borrow Scarface again?"

"Jesus, fine, Mr. Tony Montana. You wore that tape out at the house."

Yoongi grinned. "Not my fault it's my favorite movie."

"Is that all you want out of life, hmm? Guns and money and women?"

Yoongi went to answer, then stopped himself. He had thought so, but he had never held down a girlfriend, just a string of one night stands that never felt much like anything. And judging by how he had reacted to Namjoon the other way, he was starting to finally guess why.

Great. Another reason to never return to Korea. But if he was on the run with Namjoon, and the rest of his family, then it would give him time to sort out exactly what he was feeling.

Especially when he had pledged his love to someone else, long ago.

--

(Aster: I feel like this is gonna be a normal theme in my stories, Yoongi and his meds...)