Never Too Late

Give It a Shot?

"Uhhhh... Mastace?"

"Yeah?" He replied. When Mastace got a look at Briggan's face, he saw a hint of ... was it ... embarrassment? Something was making him uneasy, that much was true. His gaze shifted downward, and Mastace followed it, finding the source of the issue. It seemed the peace Mastace was experiencing inhabited more forms than just one, and it showed.

"Shit!" was all Mastace said before heading off back to Briggan's room, slamming the door behind him. He didn't know if Briggan was trying to say anything to him, and he didn't care if he was being quite honest. All he knew was that he wanted to be alone at the moment.

"Mastace, come on. I'm not mad or anything, just please let me in."

"Leave me alone, Briggan. I don't want to talk about it."

"No, Mastace. You didn't give up on me when I needed your help, and I haven't been sticking around just so I can ignore one of the biggest conflicts of your life right now, just when you need me the most. No. I'm staying right here until either you come out here and talk to me or you let me in to talk. Those are your choices. We can negotiate, but we're talking about it one way or another."

Mastace took it all in. Briggan was serious about this, and he wasn't going to let it go. Perhaps he set an example, creating quite the force to be reckoned with in the process. Mastace let his thoughts bounce around in his head a bit, then gave in.

The door opened, much to Briggan's surprise. He stepped in the bedroom and sat on his bed, for which Mastace waited for before he, too, sat. He sat a good distance from Briggan and his body language was unusually guarded.

"I'm not mad about what happened, if that's what you're worried about." Briggan offered.

"That's not what I'm worried about," Mastace said.

"I'm not revolted, either. We're guys, this shit happens. Hell, it could be a fluke."

"It wasn't a fluke..."

"So, it was..." Briggan couldn't find it in himself to finish the thought.

"Yeah, ... it was."

"I see."

"I'm sorry. I don't even know how you feel about this..."

"I'm ... I'm still letting it sink in to be honest."

"I don't know when it began, it just... clicked one day, and I haven't been able to shake it since. The more I try to ignore it... the worse I feel about it."

"You tried to deny it, and it didn't exactly work out... I get that."

"Sometimes I've wondered if I was alone in how I feel..."

"Heh, I know what that's like, being alone. I know exactly how cold it can make a person."

"Am I? Am I alone with all these feelings? All the thoughts that... may not even be natural?"

Briggan looked at the ground between his feet. "No, you're not. I've been going through the same thing. Possibly for just as long."

"So... what do we do? I'm not even sure if I can - " Mastace cut himself off, biting his lip.

"You're not sure if you can love another man?" Briggan finished, eyes blank and cold.

"I'm sorry, that sounded rude."

"No. You're alright. We're sorting through this together, and we'll figure it out. I promise."

Mastavian looked at Briggan, and nodded. "I'm sorry that I just ... came out with this so suddenly."

"Do you want me to be honest?" Briggan asked

"What do you mean?"

"I've been planning to tell you how I felt about you for a little bit, now. I haven't because I've been so scared about how you might react that I decided it was better not to risk what I had with you."

"I had no idea..."

Briggan just looked Mastace in the eyes. His facial expression softened, and the usual soulless ice inside melted away once again.

"So, ..."

"So?" Mastace tilted his head slightly, confused.

"What do you want to do? We can stay just friends, or we can... maybe... give it a shot? Give us a shot?"

Mastace looked about a moment, back at Briggan, then at the ground. He was just so shocked that he couldn't form an immediate response. "I... I... don't know..."

"Take your time. It's okay if you need to think about it." Briggan closed some of the space between the two and put his paw on Mastace's shoulder.

Mastace stood. He couldn't think. He almost couldn't breathe. Just the thought of it caused major dissonance within him. On one hand, he would give anything just to take the leap. On the other, he had no idea what the consequences of doing so might be. He knew there were still some people in the world who didn't accept people who lived that way, and even go out of their way to make sure they knew exactly how they were thought of. Both sides were equally compelling. Both sides had their merits as well as their drawbacks. Mastace thought for a few more moments before sitting back down.

"Have you come to a conclusion?"

Mastace didn't answer. Not directly, nor did he answer immediately. "What do you want to do, Briggan? You have as much say in this as I."

"I'm not sure. I was waiting for your decision so that I know where you stand. That might help me make mine."

Mastace found it hard to know what exactly he really wanted most right now. He was in such conflict. He also knew that his decision would influence the course of action Briggan would take. If he somehow got hurt because Mastace had been foolish enough to take the leap, he wasn't sure he could ever forgive himself. Still... was he ready to live with the regret of not even trying?

He noticed Briggan and he getting closer and closer to each other. He didn't say anything, nor did he want to. He thought about everything a few moments more, taking every little thing into consideration. Growing restless, he stood up once again. This time, Briggan mirrored the movement and maintained eye-contact.

"I... don't know. I just don't."

"Listen, if any of this upsets you in any way... let me know. We can drop this on the flip of a coin, no questions asked. I have no problem." Briggan placed a paw on Mastace's shoulder just like before, but Mastace did nothing in response. Either he was too deep in his thoughts to notice, or he just plain didn't care at the moment.

"No, it's fine." Mastace said. He looked Briggan in the eyes for what seemed like the millionth time since they met. He found himself staring deeply into them and getting lost in the sea of emotions they mustered up within him. He looked at them closely, causing the distance between them to gradually fill up. Before they knew it, their faces were only a few inches apart, if that. There was something about being this close that made everything else just fade away. All that really mattered at the moment ... was the moment. The feeling of the other's breath, their warmth, their heartbeat.

Before Mastace could give it a second thought, he closed the gap entirely and touched his lips to Briggan's in a gentle, affectionate kiss.