Free Falling

Chapter 9

She ran back to the room where Liam had fallen back asleep and she flipped on the bright lights, throwing the papers at the now groggy confused Liam.

"What?" Liam sat up.

"When were you going to tell me?" Olivia was hysterical. "When were you going to tell me you knew my sister. Your dad was the one who took her! You've been lying to me. Did you know who I was this entire time? Did you kidnap me on purpose? Did, you ever really love me or was this all one big twisted mind game?" Olivia started to yell.

"Olivia calm down I'm sorry. I love you. I never meant to hurt you." Liam started to get up. "I didn't want you to find out because she left us, she left us to work with our rivals. Didn't mean to cause you pain. I was trying to protect you."

"Bullshit. Just leave me alone. I'm tired of being lied to. I knew you were a bad guy. My subconscious had been trying to warn me this entire time. I don't ever want to speak to you again." Olivia stormed out and back to her room

After that night a week passed. Olivia wouldn't leave her room for anything but food and avoided Liam at all costs. He tried to apologize so many times he didn't know whe]at else to do.

"Olivia?" Liam knocked on her door for the fifth time that day. there was no reply "Olivia i know you're hurt but your acting childish"

Olivia sat with a blank stare in the bathroom. Everything was pointless, she lost the only person she had loved. She stared at the glimmering razor in front of her.

"Olivia opens the goddamn door right now or I'm breaking in! I'm starting to worry. You need to eat and you haven't come out for 2 days." Liam yelled.

She picked up the razor and made a few lines. The sharp pinch-hit her skin like ice. Little beads of crimson formed where she drew her blade.

Liam knocked one more time and when there was no reply he forcefully opened the door and surveyed the room. He burst into the bathroom and saw her on the ground. "Goddammit Olivia why!? How could you be so god damn selfish! We need you, I need you. Alive, not dead!"

"Liam... you have no right to say that. you have no idea what I'm going through. You can't just act like you know everything. Be happy Olivia. You're just being dramatic Olivia. Just ignore it, Olivia! DON'T DO THAT! But are you me? CAN YOU FEEL WHAT I FEEL! Liam.. do you know what depression feels like? I live my life in a box, a transparent box. You can see a whole world outside of you with everything you want and everything the world has to offer. But the box, that box I'm in ... Is bolted to the ground. I'm trapped inside with no way of ever getting out. you have no idea how it feels to feel so alone, to live your life believing you are a murderer and you need to repent for your sins. If you would have just notified me! give me a sign! Told me that she was alright... I may have had a normal childhood. maybe Lilly would actually talk to me! I thought she had died! EVERYONE BLAMED ME." Olivia said, tears starting to pour out of her.

Liam looked at her speechless and pulled her up to her feet. "Olivia, I'm going to give you a choice. You can let me in and I will treat you the way you deserve to be treated, or you can pull yourself the fuck together go back to work and I will forget you exist. either way, you need to toughen the fuck up. You're forgetting your in a gang that MURDERS people, you forget I can and will still kill you, but before you get all bitchy and shove me off telling me to go fuck myself you need to hear this. I love you. I hate it but it's true, Ever since I almost lost you I- I realized how much I need you. I'm sorry I kept your sister from you but I don't regret it. I did what I did to protect you and I never intentionally hurt you. I may be a fucking idiot and a stuck up asshole sometimes but I'm trying, I'm trying for you, for us..."

Olivia wiped her eyes speechless. "I think you should leave," Olivia said coldly, pulling away. "I'll see you at work first thing tomorrow and I'll be moving into the crew bunkers with everyone else."

Liam looked shocked, and even a little bit hurt. "See you first thing tomorrow," he mumbled, walking away.

Olivia stooped down and started cleaning up the blood and climbed into the shower humming and scrubbing the red from her arms the watered-down blood dripped down her body as the water thrummed on her back, the tiny jets stabbing into her skin. The memory of her sister kept running through her mind. She couldn't believe the sweet little Lacy she knew could ever do anything to hurt her sisters, right? Olivia climbed out of the shower slipping on some fuzzy checkered pajamas and settled into bed. She could hear the faint sound of Liam and his buddy's drinking at the bar, laughing, having fun, I guess what did she expect he was keeping his word...

"Liam stop moping around and have a drink with us" Lucas laughed.

"Awww is poor Tommy heartbroken" one of the guys taunted

"Agent I expect you to stop your tomfoolery and remember who you're talking to," Liam growled.

"Liam chill, what's up man?" Lucas asked.

Liam looked up "I lost her... I fucking messed up and lost the love of my life.."

"Take this, you need it," he said handing Liam a shot "this stuff is strong just warning you."