You don't know

CHAPTER 5

'Lily'

'Lily '

I glance up to find Benz standing there wave at me from the gate. My eyes light up like million stars. I smile so big running to him and hug him tightly telling him I miss him. At least I have my Benz.

He let's go of me and I just see a beautiful girl standing next to him a bit awkward there. He smile at her lovingly that I start to hate it.

' Hey Lily, this is Emma, my girlfriend. Say hi ' He gesture me to greet his girlfriend. Yeah his fucking girlfriend for real. Oh god. What the fuck am I doing here. I must be zone out with my falter smile because he just waving in front of me.

' hi ' I greet her with my dry smile. No hand shake no whatever. She just said hi back and that's it. Sorry not sorry. I look at Benz. ' should we go now? '

'Yeah, let's go' He seem confused, but I don't want to explain shit. Who want to explain shit when you're feel totally shit.

The car ride back is pretty much silent and awkward. I put on my headphones and zone out alone on the back seat. After a while, the car seem to halt to stop in front of very cozy and warm kind of house. I like it. Benz leave the car.

' welcome home, Let's go inside' Benz smile and carry my luggage for me. I just give him a tight smile before walking in with him. His girlfriend already made herself comfortable and disappear from Benz side.

' I will take you to your room so you can unpack and relaxed, great? '

' where are your parents? '

' oh I forgot to tell you, my bad. They're on their business trip. They will back in few weeks, Lily. They miss you too. '

' I miss them too. ' I said quietly because they're like my parents too. I always come over when we were kids.

' Here is your room ' he smile proudly introduce the room to me.

(room picture)

Wowwwww this is so my style. I love it. I am so exciting that I jump and hug Benz so tight forgotten that I'm still sulking. He seem to froze a moment before pat my back. I let's go immediately. I must be blush by now.

' So I take that as you love your room'

' Yeah, please thank your parents for me if they call later. I love this room so much '

' Okay, so how was your flight? ' he sit on the couch next to my bed.

' Not bad ' I look around the room and check every corner. I love everything about this room. Then the room kind of feel awkward with the silent between us. I stand in front of the window silently staring at the garden behind the house.

' Oh, I think I will go downstairs. My room actually is in front of yours. Come by if you need anything, okay?' He look at me with worry eyes.i just nob. Then he glance at me for few minutes before he leave the room.

I lock the door and start to unpack by myself silently. I start to think back as to how much has changed just by one year of us being apart. So much has changed. I sigh and continue to unpack.

After done unpack it's already 5pm, so I text my brother that I'm safe and sound. Then I just sleep on my bed scrolling my instagram.

Next thing I know, I heard soft knock on my door. I must be tired that I don't know when I fall sleep. Now it's 7pm already. Maybe time for dinner.

' Hey, did I wake you up? ' he standing in front of my room shirtless just sweatpants. Now I don't want to imagine what his girlfriend and him do anymore. It hurt, just hurt. See this is reason one side love is suck.

' Kind of, dinner? '

' Yeah, come. The cooks already prepared dinner. '

He said as he look at me a bit not sure. He looks like he want to say something but not sure if he should.I nob.

' Go ahead, I will be down in few minutes ' I shut my door before he could see my tear. I don't think I can hold it in anymore. He clearly love his girl. I clearly just a friend to him. Why accepting this facts seem so difficult. I just have to accept it and let it go, but why I feel so much pain. I miss him so bad. I want to cuddle next to him. I miss his warm, his scent and his smile. I miss him so much that it hurt.

After washing my face, I go down to dinning room only to half my step half way looking at him and his girlfriend sit next to each other looking all lovey doey. He looks so happy there. Suddenly I lost my appetite. So I turn around and decide go walk out of the house. A good walk wouldn't hurt as much as my heart now. Being me, I didn't bring my phone. So wise of me. (sarcasm)

As I walk around, I see a park nearby. So I decide to go sit on a swing there. The park is not that dark. They have lamps around. I sit there quietly alone thinking about many things. Mostly about how I can talk my brother into let me have my own apartment. Staying at Benz's clearly not a good idea anymore. I sigh. Why my life have to be so complicated all of sudden. I sit there zone out in my own world for god know how long.

Suddenly my swing is flying. I startle a bit, look at my back only find Benz standing there smiling at me. He looks so hot with his messy hair. Now my head imagine who mess his hair. What kind of kiss they share... It sucks to be me. It really suck.

••••••••••••••••••

Hi guys

Please kindly vote for me. My book is for free. Your comments will be extremely made my day. Thanks.

•••••••••••••••••