Must Have Done Something Right / Scorbus

Chapter 19 / Deconstructing Albus

"Are Mondays good for you?" Eamon asked Scorpius as they exited the History of Magic classroom, amidst a stream of other sixth-years, rushing to get out, babbling happily to each other. Eamon and Scorpius stood to the side, deciding on the best time to meet and work on their project.
Scorpius nodded his acquiesce. "Mondays are fine," he said while struggling to hold up his bag on his aching slender shoulder. It suddenly seemed like it was filled with bricks, and Scorpius wondered, not for the first time, why he insisted on carrying textbooks for all his subjects everywhere.
"That looks heavy," Eamon observed, eyeing his bag.
Scorpius considered responding with a smirk and a sarcastic reply, but decided he didn't know Eamon well enough yet. He nodded briefly. "It is. I seem to be under the impression that I am able to carry the whole library in my bag."
Eamon laughed and reached an arm out. "Here, I'll help you carry it. Where are you headed?"
So unexpected was Eamon's offer, that Scorpius was stumped for a second, before saying, "The Slytherin Common Room. And you—you don't have to help. Ravenclaw's in the opposite direction."
Eamon shrugged his broad shoulders. "I have nowhere to be in a hurry, and you'll need help carrying that library. You're small enough as it is."
Once again, Scorpius found himself surprised by his straightforwardness. "S-sorry?"
Eamon's face immediately was creased with a mix of guilt and shock. "Sorry, that must have sounded completely rude. I meant no offense. I was merely stating that you're, you know, shorter, and ... just that ... I could help ..." He trailed off and looked at Scorpius with a worried brow.
Scorpius' mouth twitched upward. "No offense taken," he said, watching the Ravenclaw Captain's face lighten considerably.
Eamon then outstretched his arm, grasped onto the strap of Scorpius' bag and casually lifted it off Scorpius' shoulder like it weighed no more than a piece of parchment. "You don't have to ... oh-okay," Scorpius said, watching in amazement as the bag was transferred from him to Eamon.
"Lead the way," Eamon said with a grin.
With pink cheeks, Scorpius smiled and turned to do just that, heading down the corridor to a set of stairs that led down to the dungeons.
Halfway down the staircase, Eamon spoke, "You know, I would have thought you would be in Ravenclaw with me."
"Why so?" Scorpius asked, perplexed. Was there anything more Slytherin than a last name like Malfoy?
"Because you're so smart," Eamon answered as if it was the most obvious answer in the world, oblivious to the deepening of Scorpius' blush. "You have brilliant marks, the professors love you ... I just think Ravenclaw would suit you better." Eamon shrugged his shoulder casually, as if the weight of Scorpius' bag was nonexistent.
Scorpius smirked. "You don't think I can be cunning and devious?"
Eamon grinned. "Perhaps. But I still think the Sorting Hat got it wrong. You would be perfect in Ravenclaw."
Mere weeks ago, Scorpius would have been inclined to agree with Eamon. He often thought his life would be better if he didn't share a room with Matt and the other boys. But now, with Albus in the picture, Scorpius answered with, "What about my friends in Slytherin?"
Dark blue eyes twinkling, Eamon said, "You'd be friends with me, of course."
Scorpius found himself momentarily mesmerised by Eamon's eyes. "Would you want to?" he blurted out suddenly.
"What?"
"Would you want to be friends with me?" Scorpius asked again.
Eamon look surprised. "Of course. Why would you ask that?"
Scorpius found it hard to believe that Eamon hadn't mentioned anything about the Albus-versus-Matt issue that had spread to all corners of Hogwarts. Surely, he knew of it. But he was acting as if he didn't.
"Ahhh," Eamon answered, nodding his head as if he finally understood. "You're asking me which side I take on the war your friends in Slytherin seem to have started." He chuckled and shook his head in amusement. "I should think it was quite obvious which side I take," Eamon said, staring deliberately at him. Scorpius had the feeling there was a double meaning in his gaze.
And then, suddenly, a thought entered Scorpius' mind. Could it be that Eamon ... no, certainly not. It can't be, Scorpius mused as he stared back at the taller boy.
But as they rounded the corner that led to the Slytherin Common Room entrance, the idea hadn't left Scorpius alone, and he was entertaining the thought that maybe, just maybe, it could be true.
"I can't believe your common room is all the way down here," Eamon observed. "I'm impressed you walk all that way with a bag this heavy."
Scorpius felt guilty. "Why didn't you tell me it was getting heavy? I could have carried—"
"Relax," Eamon laughed. "Of course I don't mind carrying your bag for you."
Something unexpected and unparalleled suddenly occurred to Scorpius.
Unless he was reading the signals abysmally wrong, Eamon Hudson, Captain of the Ravenclaw Quidditch team, liked him.
The thought had barely processed when the entrance to the Common Room was opened and out stepped Albus.
"Scorp!"
Scorpius jumped.
Albus turned to Eamon. "Hudson?"
"Potter," he replied.
"Albus," Scorpius said.
Silence, perfectly awkward silence.
Scorpius wished he knew how to disapparate.
"What's going on?" Albus said after a moment, his eyes moving rapidly from Eamon to Scorpius, waiting for either of them to speak.
Scorpius grappled with his mind, trying to fit words together to answer Albus' questions, but Eamon beat him to it.
"I was just walking Scorpius to your common room," he explained. "His bag was heavy, so I offered to carry it." He grinned his dazzling white smile at Albus, who, Scorpius noticed, wasn't even looking at him. Albus' eyes were trained on Scorpius.
"I was just about to come up to you," Albus said to Scorpius.
"Oh, that's alright," Scorpius answered. "Eamon helped me." He gestured to his bag still hanging off one of the Ravenclaw's broad shoulders.
"I see that," Albus said in a tone Scorpius couldn't decipher. He turned to Eamon and smiled.""Nice of you to help him. His bag is always heavy." Scorpius noticed that it wasn't one of Albus' genuine smiles—the kind that made his heart beat faster. His eyes weren't shining like they should.
Eamon chuckled. "I know. Scorp, you should get rid of some of the extra baggage you carry around."
The two Slytherins stopped.
Scorp.
That was what Albus called him.
Scorpius quickly recovered from his brief mind-lapse and smiled at Eamon, deliberately not looking at Albus. "Maybe I should," he said, reaching for his bag. "Thank you kindly for carrying my bag. I can take it from here."
"Not a problem," Eamon said. "If you need help again, just let me know." Another white smile was delivered his way and Scorpius felt himself flush. With a final twinkle of his dark blue eyes, Eamon said, "See you round." He turned and within a few steps, he disappeared up a staircase.
The moment they were left alone, Albus began talking. "I didn't know you were friends with him." There was no accusation in his tone, it sounded like he was commenting on the weather, but Scorpius knew that there was something more than the nonchalance of his casual comment.
"I wasn't. Not until an hour ago. We were partnered for a History of Magic project," Scorpius clarified, looking at Albus cautiously.
"And now he's carrying your bag for you?" Albus asked, jumping in quickly. His tone had risen a fraction.
Scorpius frowned. "It's like I said, my bag was heavy. Eamon is obviously more capable, and he was a gentleman and offered to carry it. That's all. Why are you so concerned?" He stared at Albus and could almost see the other boy's mind whirring with thoughts. His was too, Scorpius knew. The shock that maybe Eamon liked him had yet to settle in. Both Albus and Eamon were confusing him greatly, and Scorpius felt like he was trapped in the middle, tossed about by waves bigger than he was.
Tense seconds passed before Albus smiled at Scorpius—a genuine one. "I'm not."
Scorpius knew he was lying. "Al ... what's wrong?"
Albus' eyebrows dipped down, as if he just remembered something. "He called you Scorp," he remembered.
"I know."
"Why?"
"I don't know."
Albus, it seemed, had nothing else to say, though Scorpius knew he had more on his mind. Eamon using his nickname had obviously affected Albus more than it did him. Nevertheless, Albus just stood there, quiet, and Scorpius felt completely frustrated. Why was it people never said what they wanted to say? Including himself, Scorpius thought. There was plenty he could, and probably should, tell Albus, but he just wanted to drop the subject.
Feeling that Albus would appreciate it, Scorpius asked him, "Would you please help me carry my bag to the room?"
Albus moved instantly, grapping the strap of Scorpius' bag and lifted it onto his shoulder. "Of course," he said, and smiled once again at Scorpius. But once again, there was something missing from his smile. But Scorpius didn't have the brain space to dwell too much on it. He felt he was teetering on the edge of mental fatigue.
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Scorpius decided to escape to the library after dinner, to have some much needed alone time, never mind how upset Albus was when he told him.
"I thought we could hang out," Albus had said.
"I—I have to study. If we're going to Hogsmeade tomorrow, I have to do some work now," had been Scorpius' reply, though even to himself, it sounded feeble. He hated himself for the downcast look Albus adopted and his farewell of, "'Kay, bye," but he needed to be alone. There were things that still didn't make sense. He felt like shaking Albus and shouting, "It's because of you, you idiot! You make me crazy with your mixed signals!" but of course, that was never going to happen. So he swallowed his feeling of bitterness and walked away to the library.
He sighed in relief in the silence he found between two tall shelves of books: away from Albus, and away from Eamon, both of whom left Scorpius in a state of complete bewilderment.
His thoughts turned to Eamon Hudson; a boy he only really knew by face before today—and a very handsome face at that, it couldn't be denied. He was incredibly popular, the girls loved him, and he was Ravenclaw's hope to win the Quidditch Cup. In all outward appearances, Eamon was the 'Albus' of Ravenclaw. Scorpius groaned. Such a comparison was certainly not helpful.
He would never have guessed that Eamon had the same preferences he did, and he was sure the rest of the school didn't either. That being said, in the past few days, Scorpius had received more letters than he ever dared to hope for from students who essentially came out to him. Perhaps Eamon was another closet case. It explained why he didn't have a girlfriend—as anyone with that much popularity and looks should have; case in point: Albus Potter.
Scorpius sighed, wishing that his life were easier than this. He wished that the roles of Eamon and Albus were reversed, so that Eamon had Mel, and Albus liked him. Because there was no refuting it, Scorpius knew he was still in love with Albus. He didn't think anything could change that. The more time he spent with Albus, the more he realised how much in love with him he was, and the more he realised how pointless his dream was. Maybe this was a sign: to forget Albus, and move on to things more attainable, like Eamon.
Scorpius snorted. The idea that Eamon Hudson could ever be considered second-best would be laughable to anyone who heard him.
"Scorpius?"
His head shot up. "Lily?"
The red-head smiled and approached him. Scorpius found that he didn't mind, despite his desire for solitude.
"Hiya," she greeted, sitting cross-legged next to him.
"Hello."
"How have you been?" Lily asked.
Scorpius held his head in his palms. Wasn't that the million-dollar question? Scorpius wished he knew how to answer her. He answered as truthfully as he could, "Confused."
"By my brother?" she asked.
Scorpius looked at her. "What?"
She chuckled. "Your face is all I need by way of answer. Don't worry, Albie confuses everyone. It's what makes him so infuriating, yet so Albus ... if you get what I mean."
Scorpius smirked. "I think I do."
"Well, if you're going to keep running away when he frustrates you, you might need to find somewhere closer to the Slytherin dormitories for a quick getaway." She laughed at her own comment, and the sound lifted Scorpius' spirits. He didn't know Lily very well at all, and she wasn't even in his year, but even in the short amount of time they had spent in each others' company, they had established a level of comfort in their friendship that often took Scorpius much longer to reach.
"I shouldn't have run away," he admitted. "He was very upset."
"Let him be." Lily shrugged. Then she took on a more serious look that made Scorpius listen to her carefully. "Look, I'll be honest with you, Scorpius, and I'll tell you something not many people know about Albus. He may seem really comfortable in his own skin, and he may appear to everyone that he's confident and strong and powerful and the best at whatever he does ... but really, Albus is a sensitive person, and he's dependent on the people around him. He doesn't deal well with change. And being friends with you is a big change."
Instantly, a feeling of self-resentment filled Scorpius, and Lily noticed abruptly. "No, don't feel bad. Trust me, the very fact that Albus is now your friend tells me a whole lot about you."
"What do you mean?"
"I mean that I know that you're really special to Albus, and I know he really wants to be a good friend to you. He's willing to do a lot to keep you around, you should know. But sometimes, he may overstep the boundary a little, and that's when people become frustrated with him." She paused and gently laid a hand on his arm. "Whatever the reason is for you being upset with him, don't think it's because he's angry with you or he doesn't like you. It's usually the exact opposite, because he's too protective of the things he considers are his. And now, you're in that circle."
Scorpius swallowed thickly, and after a quiet moment, asked, "Who else is? In his circle, I mean."
"Not many people ... just our family, cousins, Mel, and now you. And most of the time, it's not a bad place to be."