Must Have Done Something Right / Scorbus

Chapter 25 / It's Not Me, It's You

Albus wasn't a fool, nor was he oblivious. He knew there had been a silent, uncomfortable tension growing between himself and Scorpius over the past two weeks or so. It was like a scratchy blanket that he couldn't get off himself and had to pretend it was much softer than it really was. Ever since Mel had asked him to the Halloween Party a week ago, it seemed as if his conversations with Scorpius had been skin-deep and unmeaningful. Though he supposed he could acknowledge that it was because Mel and Scorp didn't like each other. He had come to accept their mutual dislike much easier than he thought he would.
But what really created a sense of uneasiness on his part was when Scorpius told him that he was going to the party with Eamon Hudson.
Albus remembered feeling anger boil up inside him instantly. The need to hunt Hudson down almost compelled him to march straight to the Ravenclaw Common Room and demand what the hell he wanted with Scorp. Albus calmed himself just in time to respond with a very fake, "That's great, Scorp." He knew he had little reason to distrust Eamon. He seemed like he genuinely liked Scorpius; but that thought alone had Albus seething, and he couldn't stop himself from imagining the great delight he would feel if he were to Stupefy the bastard.
Albus was confused. He didn't understand why he was feeling this way. Hating Eamon made no sense. In fact, he should he glad for him; that he can provide Scorp with the one thing he's been missing, the one thing Albus can't give. He hated that there was such a thing.
He groaned out loud at the stalemate he was in. Scorpius, in the bed next to his, responded with a shuffle of blankets.
Albus checked the window to find the sun had not yet emerged, so he reached to his trunk and pulled out his instrument. He held the guitar close to himself and embraced it as if it was an old friend. It was like his journal, except instead of a quill and parchment, he had songs and music.
Hello, good morning, how do you do?
What makes your rising sun so new?
I could use a fresh beginning too
All of my regrets are nothing new
His fingers danced across the neck of the guitar as his mind ran over all the things that were too confusing to say out loud. The faces of Scorpius, Eamon, Mel and Matt flashed in his mind—people who, whether knowingly or inadvertently, were transforming his life into a tangled pile of thoughts and doubts, immersed with violent doses of rage and resentment. When had he become so angry? What was the point where he stopped speaking his mind, and started to think twice about everything he said? When did Scorpius come to mean so much more to him than he ever would have thought possible?
So this is the way that I say that I need you
This is the way, this is the way...
That I'm learning to breathe, I'm learning to crawl
I'm finding that you and you alone can break my fall
I'm living again, awake and alive
I'm dying to breathe in these abundant skies
There were things he could say with a guitar in his hand, under pre-morning light with no one else around, that he couldn't say otherwise. He wanted to convince Scorp to forget about Eamon; he wanted to blame Eamon for taking Scorp away from him; he wanted to shout at the new persona Mel seemed to be wearing lately; he wanted to pull his own hair out for stuffing up relationships with people that were close to him. Albus so desperately wanted to figure things out.
Hello, good morning, how've you been?
Yesterday left my head kicked in
I never thought I could fall like that
Never knew that I could hurt this bad
Even as he sung the words, Albus knew them to be true. When sixth year had begun, he never expected that in such a short time, his entire life would be turned on its head. His universe used to revolve around himself, his Quidditch team, his Captaincy, his popularity and everything else that made him the person that everyone else loved.
But everything had changed, and Albus knew that it was no longer about him, or Quidditch or his reputation.
It was about Scorpius.
And Albus found that he was more than okay with that.
&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&
"I need to go to Hogsmeade," Scorpius said vaguely as he picked at a blade of grass near his crossed legs. "The Halloween Party's in a week," he added by way of explanation.
Albus picked up a small flat stone and threw it horizontally at the calm surface of the lake, breaking the peaceful tension that rippled softly under the midday sun. The rock skidded for four steps before disappearing suddenly beneath the water—Albus suspected the Giant Squid had a part to play in its instant disappearance.
"I'll go with you, if you want," Albus offered his friend.
A moment of silence passed by in which both of them perused the ground in front of them with much more intensity than required. Scorpius eventually piped up, but when Albus heard what he had to say, he wished he had stayed quiet. "I'm going with Eamon."
Albus' stomach lurched uncomfortably. "Yeah," he said distractedly, his mind instantly conjuring up a list of Top Ten Ways to Get Rid of Eamon Hudson. In the back of his mind, he dimly registered that the Cruciatus Curse was still illegal.
"But you still need to go," Scorpius continued, mutilating another perfectly normal blade of grass into unrecognisable shreds. "You don't own anything decent enough."
Albus swore he heard a smile in Scorp's voice. He turned and saw the corner of his mouth tilt upward and an instantaneous wave of happiness and relief flooded him. He had missed Scorpius' smile, and he had missed that he could put one on his face. Ever since the invitations to the Halloween Party had been released, their relationship had been filled with awkwardness and silent conversations. "Piss off," Albus said, allowing his own smile to be heard through his friendly retort. "Just because I don't own six pairs of jeans, doesn't mean that I don't own perfectly acceptable clothing."
Scorpius looked at him curiously. "How in Merlin's name do you know that I own six pairs of jeans?"
Albus flushed. He had tried to make it sound like he had hazarded a guess, but the truth was that, over time, he had noticed. He knew that Scorpius always tried to wear something different most days—though why, Albus didn't understand—and he had inexplicably undertaken a mission to count how many jeans the blond owned. And although he would probably never admit it, he also knew how many coats, school robes, and shoes Scorpius owned. It was impossible to be best friends with Scorpius and not become very familiar with his wardrobe. "Er ... lucky guess?"
"You knew," Scorpius said, ignoring Albus. He chuckled a little and grinned at Albus. "Why on earth have you been keeping track of how many jeans I own?"
"Is this really important?" Albus responded with his own question.
"Yes," Scorpius smirked. "It really is."
They entered into a short and silent staring contest, in which Albus conceded defeat almost instantly, unable to resist the all-knowing satisfied smirk plastered on Scorpius' face.
"Can you blame me?" Albus blurted. "You somehow manage to come up with a brand new outfit every day, and I was simply curious to see how you can fit all those clothes in your trunk. It's like Mary Poppins!"
Scorpius frowned bemusedly at him before Albus remembered that he wouldn't be able to appreciate his Muggle reference. "Never mind. Anyway, I've figured out that you own six pairs of jeans." Albus finished his declaration feeling incredibly ridiculous.
Scorpius was quiet for a moment, before coughing surreptitiously to hide a small chuckle that escaped his mouth. "Well ... that was interesting, if not a little frightening that you would keep such close tabs on my attire."
"It just happened," Albus defended himself. "I don't mean to watch you dress."
Scorpius' eyebrows shot up.
"No!" Albus jumped in immediately, automatically feeling blood rush to his cheeks. "I didn't mean—no, look, I don't watch you dress, I just meant to say ... that I watch what you wear—oh Merlin I've put my foot in it this time, haven't I?"
Scorpius burst out laughing, but Albus didn't find it too amusing as he was still simmering in the heat of his embarrassment while fumbling over the right things to say. He shut his mouth before he vomited out more highly humiliating words, and waited for Scorpius' to calm down. But even in his embarrassment, Albus felt extremely good inside as he watched his friend laugh so freely. Scorpius hadn't nearly laughed as much as he should have recently, and Albus was filled with contentment as he stared at the small dimples on Scorp's cheeks and the laugh lines around his eyes. It was a sight he had missed, and one—Albus noticed bizarrely—that caused something small to jolt in his stomach. Something that was rather pleasant.
"Your face was priceless," Scorpius gushed out after he had gained enough air to speak.
"Are you done?" Albus asked, amused.
"It might take me a few days to get over that you watch me dress," he said with a giggle. Albus noted that Scorp's cheeks were just as pink as his probably were. "But for the moment, yes, I'm done."
Albus highly doubted that; the grin on Scorpius' face had not diminished. "Well," he began with a breath, "after that lovely, yet incredibly embarrassing interlude, I think we should divert conversation to more important things."
"Yes," Scorpius agreed with a nod, "Like what you're going to wear to the Halloween Party."
Albus groaned. "I was thinking we should talk about Quidditch," he suggested futilely.
Scorpius shot him a dead-pan look, and chose to ignore Albus entirely. "I think you should wear a suit," he declared.
Albus raised an eyebrow—something he only recently discovered he could do. He attributed it to being Scorpius' friend, who had mastered the one-eyebrow lift since his second birthday. "Scorp, that's Muggle," he thought it necessary to point out.
Scorpius rolled his eyes as if what Albus just said was the most obvious thing, which, he mused, it really was. "Albus, I am aware of this. But I think you would look handsome in one," Scorpius said.
"Everyone else will be wearing dress robes," he said. "Plus, I should probably get Mel's advice." He automatically wished he could swallow back the words when he saw Scorp's countenance darken significantly. He silently cursed himself; he knew better than to mention Mel to Scorpius, and vice versa. Whatever their problem was, it was still unresolved and Albus assumed it never would be. He glanced at Scorpius and winced when he saw his lowered head.
"Scorp, look—" he began, thinking he should probably say something.
"No, you're right. She's your girlfriend, you need to ask her," Scorpius said, noticeably not making eye contact with Albus. His finger immediately grabbed onto another few blades of grass, as his brow line creased. Albus had the impression that his friend was in serious thought. Then, Scorpius looked up and, throwing the tuft of grass next to him, grabbed his bag and stood up. "I should go," he said. "I'm hoping to put the final touches on the Muggle Studies essay before I hand it in."
Albus' heart sank. They had been having such an amazing time; their conversation had been fun and he had made Scorpius laughed. Why did he have to go and mention his girlfriend in the middle of it all?
"Oh—okay," he said, standing up too. "Let me walk you back."
Albus could tell Scorpius was about to respond with a defiant no, when suddenly, another voice spoke from behind Albus.
"You know, if you keep being seen on your own like this, people will start making assumptions about you two."
Albus swivelled to see Matt leaning against a nearby tree, watching them with a decidedly malicious smirk. "Matt," he said. "I don't remember you being invited here."
Matt snorted. "Well, I wouldn't have been, not when you two are off planning your elopement."
Albus rolled his eyes. "Just get lost," he said. "If the best you can do is make false, cheap jibes about us, then you're losing your touch."
"Oh, I wouldn't call them all false," Matt said with a voice that suggested he knew something Albus didn't. "Isn't that right, fag?" He looked right over Albus' shoulder to Scorpius.
The blond sucked in a quick breath, but otherwise made no noise or motion. Albus, who didn't want to go into what Matt was meaning to say, sighed loudly. "Look, whatever, let's just go, Scorp." He turned to Scorpius and bent to pick up his bag.
"Don't you walk away from me," Matt interrupted.
Albus looked at him. "Who do you think you are, my father?" he asked, shooting Matt a frustrated look, before taking Scorpius' arm and set off back to the Castle.
"I said, don't walk away!" Matt yelled before marching directly towards the pair in seconds, and grabbed harshly on Albus' arm.
"Albus!" Scorpius yelped as Matt pulled Albus away, twisted his hands in Albus' t-shirt and brought him right up into his face.
"Let me go, you bastard!" Albus said angrily, pushing Matt's hands off his shirt.
Matt let go, but in the next moment, his right fist was punching Albus' cheek.
Albus' head swung to the side in an explosion of pain. He saw colourful stars flare-up in his vision, like mini spells being fired.
"ALBUS!" Scorpius screamed, running up to Albus.
Albus wanted Scorpius out of the fight and out of Matt's way. He flexed his jaw and contorted his face to ensure everything was okay, shaking the dizziness out of his system. "Stay back," he warned to his friend a split second before he attacked Matt, letting his own fist fly. Dimly, in his mind, he wondered whether a wand might be a more civilised way to respond, but Matt had always been a hands-on kind of bloke, and Albus wasn't about to sit back and wave his wand.
He felt Matt's face crumbled under his fist with a satisfying crunch.
"ALBUS!" Scorpius cried out again. "Stop it! Both of you! STOP!"
Neither Albus nor Matt was about to relent as they attacked each other with brute, physical force. They had their arms grappling around each other, in a demented form of dance, as they tried to gain the upper hand. Albus thought he had it when he secured Matt's head under his arm and proceeded to punch it. But Matt shoved his hand to the back of his knees and the two went crashing down.
Words weren't necessary as they rolled on the ground like animals, teeth clenched, hands punching, feet kicking. It wasn't about how well they can argue; it was about how well they could fight. And Albus was sick and tired of Matt's persistent and cruel bullying. He was fighting for Scorpius, and he wasn't about to let up. Albus felt a hard blow to his gut and he curled up instantly. Knowing he couldn't afford to be momentarily winded, he forced himself to react through the pain and aimed a sharp hit at Matt's nose.
"Incarcerous!"
Immediately, the attacks stopped,
against the will of the two fighters.
Albus tried to shove his arm forward
again, but found he was magically
bound not to. He looked up and saw
Scorpstanding a few metres away,
wand clutched in his trembling hands. Matt, on the ground next to him, had
also stopped, but was sending death
glares at both Albus and Scorpius.
"Scorpius," Albus said calmly and in a low voice. "Release the spell."
"No," Scorpius said in a much braver voice than Albus had ever heard. "I'm sick of you getting in trouble for fighting. And I won't let it happen again; especially not for me."
"Too much man sport for you, queer?" Matt sneered. "Afraid your boyfriend's actually going to grow a pair?"
Rage flooded him and Albus lunged forward, forgetting that Scorp's spell was still in place. He was jerked back violently, before he could get within a foot of Matt. "Release it, Scorp!" he yelled.
"No, Al. Just calm down and walk away. Please," he begged. "I don't want you getting hurt."
Matt snorted. "Isn't that sweet, Albus? She's taking such good care of you."
"SHUT UP!" Albus shouted, seeing red. His veins were coursing with blood, his adrenaline was sky-high, and all he wanted to do was cause Matt serious pain. His flexed his fingertips and gritted his teeth in anticipation, his muscles electrically charged for the fight.
"Ignore him, Albus. Walk away."
Scorpius was not going to relent, Albus knew it. He also know, though, that if he were to heed Scorp's advice and leave, Matt would never let him hear the end of it, and Albus was sick and tired of the jibes directed at his masculinity.
But wasn't that the problem? Breathing heavily, Albus quickly mused over the situation and let memories of that very morning enter his thoughts. Didn't he just decide that it was no longer all about himself? Didn't he choose to forget about what others thought of him? Because right now, it was about Scorpius, and Albus was man enough to know when to step back. Scorpius was right, as usual, Albus thought.
He lowered his fists and stepped away from Matt. The look of pride and respect on Scorpius' face was worth it.
He chose to ignore to expected taunts from Matt about his manhood, and Scorpius' feminine affinities.
He chose to walk back to the Castle, Scorpius at his side.