Soothe

6: Déja Vu, For One, But Not For Another

Author's Note:

And here is yet another chapter of this sort of AU version of the 2009 GA/PP crossover.

Thanks to the people who have liked this work:

On Ao3: Arissen, Hotgitay, oliviajames, tisziny, EmyLilas, as well as 2 guests.

On Fanfiction: None so far, actually. It's a bit sad?

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Thank you to all the supporters!

Thanks to the other people too, who read this and I just don't know you by name!

Thanks to the people in the future, who will read this long after.

bobbiejelly.

Soothe

In Which Meredith teaches Addison how to self-soothe.

Before Meredith married Derek, and After she'd almost told Addison she liked her.

F/F. Meredith Grey/Addison Montgomery. MerAdd. Meddison. GA/PP Fanfiction.

Set during GA - "Before After/An Honest Mistake & PP - Acceptance/Ex-Life. Rated M.

Inspired by "Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now" by Illegal Kittens, "Blame Game" by LordOfLezzies, and "All We Ever Are We Are" by SilverStarsAndMoons.

Chapter 6: Déja Vu, For One, But Not For Another

In Which Addison remembers parts of Meredith's past that she doesn't, and in which Meredith brings up some parts of her past that in turn, Addison doesn't know about.

1

"Addison!" Meredith yells out for her. "Doctor Montgomery!" Meredith screams down the hallway. And it's déja vu, for one, but not for another - It's déja vu for Addison, only. Meredith has no memory of herself talking with Addison on morphine, but Addison vividly remembers this, and so she's walking away now from Meredith in a huff, and Meredith has no idea why.

Meredith expects Addison to turn around and ask her something like 'what the hell do you want from me, you've already taken my husband, and apparently you've literally taken him right in that room, so what the hell can I offer you that I haven't given away yet! What the hell are you calling me for, in apology? What the hell can you give me to make any or all of this at all okay?"

She seriously expects Addison to chew her out in front of Derek, but she doesn't. Addison doesn't chew her out and Addison doesn't turn around and Addison doesn't stop walking with her click-click-click of her at least six-inch-high-heels she always wears everywhere. Addison keeps walking in long and fast strides out of the exam room, out of the hallway, and just away.

Away from Meredith, and this makes Meredith's heart tear in two because she really does care for Addison and not only in a sort of strange and semi-sexual way but also in a really does care for how Addison is feeling and being and existing way and she really does want her to stop and turn around and chew her out so at least she knows she exists to Addison Montgomery, still.

Meredith has this sinking feeling she was already starting to have earlier when she realized Addison will have no reason to ever come back to Seattle after Archer. Meredith realizes now that Addison, now, has no reason to ever talk to her, ever again, ever after what she just admitted to her and she's so scared and lost and lonely and all she wants again is Addison.

Meredith wants to chase her, even more now than before. She says to Derek 'keep that ice on that hand, I have to go check on Archer Montgomery,' because she sort-of does, but because she knows that that's probably where Addison is headed and sure, she's ambushing her but there's nothing that's stopping her from just standing close enough to see Addison, again.