Soothe

16: Standoff, Crossfire.

Author's Note:

This one is heavy. Really heavy, and much more involved content than other chapters.

CW: Fighting. Disputes. Anger. Unhealthy Relationships. Emotional Abuse.

(Basically this portrayal of Derek Shepherd is a total jackass).

Much worse than on the show. I want to write hurt-comfort.

So, just so you have a heads up about those facts.

This one has a lot of dialogue, less inner stuff.

And a slightly less limited 3rd person.

Hope you enjoy reading it, now.

Take care of yourself!

bobbiejelly

PREVIOUSLY ON "SOOTHE":

"What even is your type?" Addison finally inquires about Meredith, and Meredith's eyes go wide as saucers and her face goes as red as a beet. "Well, I mean, we kind of share the type that likes Derek Shepherd-Shaped-People," Meredith eventually mutters, dodging the question by moving laterally. "I meant in women," Addison deadpans, and Meredith now panics completely.

"Are you going to answer that question to me, Addison? Are you going to tell me YOUR type in women?" Meredith deflects, hoping that Addison will just start talking about herself, so she doesn't have to answer that question. "Maybe," Addison says with a shy expression, and Meredith finds it adorable. "But you should probably give Derek a 'yes' or a 'no', first. She says.

"Why would that matter to you answering my question?" Meredith groans, wanting to know now.

"You really do need to give Derek an answer, and maybe tell him you found the ring," Addie says.

"Addison, is it wrong if I want to tell him, no, but I don't know how, or if I'm even strong enough?" Mer asks.

"Trust me, it's not wrong, I've been there before," Addison sighs. "I held on far too long to him..."

"How did you finally let him go?" Meredith asks her, searching, seeking. "Adultery?" Addison laughs.

"Do you recommend it? Leaving Derek, via adultery?" Meredith asks her, actually seriously.

"No, I don't, Meredith," Addison says, also seriously. "It takes too much out of you. Too much."

"You still hate yourself for it?" Meredith asks her. "Every day of my life," Addison answers her.

"You know, it's really awful to see all your self-loathing," Meredith offers. "I hate watching it."

"I don't want you to end up like me, Meredith. Hating yourself over him. Or more adultery..."

"I think you turned out pretty great," Meredith smiles. "But you're right. I do have to leave him!"

END OF FLASHBACK SEQUENCE.

Soothe

In Which Meredith teaches Addison how to self-soothe.

Before Meredith married Derek, and After she'd almost told Addison she liked her.

F/F. Meredith Grey/Addison Montgomery. MerAdd. Meddison. GA/PP Fanfiction.

Set during GA - "Before After/An Honest Mistake & PP - Acceptance/Ex-Life. Rated M.

Inspired by "Nothing's Gonna Stop Us Now" by lespians, "Blame Game" by LordOfLezzies, "All We Ever Are We Are" by SilverStarsAndMoons and "I'll Feel Better When The Headaches Go Away" by StepIsInsanity.