Light of my Life (STONY)

I love you.

Tony's POV

Peggy's funeral has been the hardest thing I've seen Steve go through. He made a heartwarming speech about how she always helped him and got him through everything. When he sat back down a tear ran down his face. I was sat away from him. I couldn't comfort him. After a few weeks, he was beginning to return to normal. Or, so I thought.

"Shit!" I looked around the room frantically - my face had a thin veil of sweat and the room was completely dark. I looked next to me to wake up Steve - except he wasn't there. I pushed my nightmare from my head and thought about where Steve could be, and I had no clue until I heard a small amount of movement from the bathroom.

"Steve?" The door was locked, and I listened intently. I could hear him breathing on the other side of the wall. I grabbed a couple of Nat's bobby pins that I'd stolen from her to piss her off (girls lose them constantly - she didn't usually notice) and slowly, carefully picked the lock.

A small click told me my work was done, and I gently opened the door.

"Steve?" I called out again. At first I didn't really see him, but then I turned on the light, squinted and saw him in the corner.

TRIGGER WARNING - SELF HARM

"Honey? Hey, talk to me." I walked over to him and realised what he was doing. "Steve, don't do that to yourself," I said gently, taking the razorblade away from him. He had silent tears running down his face and I took his arms to look at them. I couldn't even count how many cuts were there - they were all bleeding a lot and a lot of them were layered, making them bleed even more. "Fuck," I breathed. "Steve, baby, you gotta talk to me."

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I didn't think you'd find out, I-"

"Hey, stop."

"Don't be mad."

"I'm not mad. What happened?"

"I don't wanna talk about it," he said bitterly. I nodded and pulled his head to my chest. I then wrapped my arms around his waist and he went to hug me but stopped himself. "I don't wanna get blood on your shirt-"

"I don't care." He pulled his arms around me and I kissed him on the head. I didn't really know what to do - I remember last time he cleaned my cuts but I had no idea how to do that. "Is there a medikit somewhere? I wanna clean your cuts and put you to bed."

"You don't need to, they'll be healed by morning anyway." He was right - they'd already stopped bleeding and were forming a protective layer over themselves to heal. I nodded.

"Okay. Well, I'm gonna wrap it in a bandage and put you to bed anyway," I replied.

"How did you get in?"

"I picked the lock."

"How can you do that ?"

"I stole bobby pins from Nat and picked the lock..?"

"Oh."

"You sound disappointed."

"No, no..."

"A little?"

"No." After searching in a drawer for a moment I found a bandage and carefully wrapped it around Steve's arms. "You didn't have to do this," he whispered.

"You did it for me." He chuckled lightly.

"Still." I shrugged and walked him over to bed, before turning off the bathroom light and joining him. He snuggled down and kissed my neck.

"What are you doing?"

"Night, Tony." And with that, he fell asleep.