She's Suicidal

eight

So guess what ? I actually like sour worms. They're sour but I like how my face changes and what it makes me feel. Weird right ? Idontcare.

Oh yeah , so the person that was wobbling the doorknob was just some random couple looking for a room to fuck in. After they left us Nephine went to go lock the door and we continued where we left off. It was beautiful.

He made me feel so adored. He explored every part of me with care and absolute adoration. He took things just as slow as i wanted them. He tortured me. I loved it. He even used some ice cubes to devour my vagina haha. It was mind blowing. I dont think I've ever had someone explore me like Nephine did last night.

After we were done we went to shower. The room we were in had a bathroom inside. Nephine washed our clothes for us and hung them by the shower. We then retreated to bed naked and he cuddled me. It felt blissful.

So at this present moment I'm on my way back to the room after taking a morning shower and getting dressed in yesterdays clothes. Nephine did the same but he is still in the bathroom using the toilet i think.

"We're leaving in a few minutes. Stay here while I go get car keys" Nephine says as he exits the bathroom and then leaves the room. So bossy.

I remain inside and finally get the chance to look around the room. Since the place is underground there is no natural light. But the lights are very pretty. They look like glitter all over the room. The room is quite simple but the art pieces make it look spectacular. The floor looks like the sky. Literally. There's clouds on the floor. The bed is black and everything else is black too. There's a bed , some storage thingy by the corners of the room and the art pieces. The bed is in the middle of the room. Its more like a mattress with black sheets and a black duvet along with black pillows. Its different but it looks pretty nevertheless.

After some time just looking around and observing the place Nephine walks in and signals for me to follow him. But before we reach the door he turns and grabs me by the door and kisses me. Then he quickly lets me go again and licks my cheek, smiles then takes my hand and leaves the room with me following behind.

I'm not surprised anymore. I've accepted that Nephine is one weird and random GEM. And I actually really like that about him. He's nothing like I had expected him to be like the first time we met. And I like that. A lot.

He walks us out the same way we got in but let me know that there's another way of going out that's quicker but he'd only show me that one on another day.

I won't lie, this whole thing excites me. The whole set-up is pretty rad. It makes my blood rush which is what i love most about it. Its the feeling.

He takes us to a different car this time. This one looks more vintage and its in sky blue. It looks cool. Or at least that's what i think. We go in and we're off.

Two Hours Later

Nephine brought me to some abandoned playground. The grass had grown bigger and some of it looks dry. The swings and other sets look rusted and the whole setting just looks sad. And creepy. Sad and creepy.

I look over to Nephine and notice that he has been really quiet for the past ten minutes that we have been here. He's just very distant right now. Its really bothering me because I'm used to having him annoy me and etc. Ugh i hate this.

"GEM..." i try

"Hey GEM , are you - you o-kay?" I try again with a little nudge

He slowly turns his head to face me and i notice his red glossy eyes. They hold so much sadness. He gives me a side smile before he begins...

"We used to come here all the time. He'd play around with me. Chase me around , do back flips and other games right here in this playground. He used to have so much love and kindness. He gave me his undivided attention and he promised to be there for me , always." The tears fell. He didn't stop them. He just let them be.

I didn't want to interject because i felt like he might just need to vent and let it all out maybe ? I dont know. Okay the truth is ,i dont know what to do in these kind of situations and this is kind of making me a bit anxious. Anxiety ? Not you again! Really dude ? I thought we broke up ?

"He loved me. Now , now i dont think he even remembers i exist" he finishes then looks straight into my eyes.

"I'm sorry" that's all i manage to say

He chuckles a little then stands up and begins talking again.

"Its like when he met her I died. We all did. When he married her he also disowned me as a son. I'm just another stranger to him now."

Woah. That's deep. I guess he's talking about his dad. So he isn't around ? Wow. And that's all because of one women ? I mean why in the world would you disown your own sperm just because you've fallen inlove with someone else. To me , that makes absolutely no sense.

My breathing has calmed down a bit now. I'm trying to breathe and just keep cool. Its not easy but I'm managing really well.

"He chose his path. Now choose yours." I say

"What's that suppose to mean ? He fucken made that choice for me when he walked out of my fucken life!" He says with his veins popping out of the sides of his forehead

"Your father. He chose to leave you. He chose to go be with her and not you guys. He chose to pretend you were never born because of the love he once shared with your mother. That was his choice. That's the only choice he made." I say while standing up and stepping closer to him

"Its your choice what you do with your life and how you let his choices affect your life. Holding onto him and his doings won't benefit you in anyway. No matter how angry you are. Feel all that then move to the next feeling and keep feeling until you need to find a new feeling. Dont hold onto it. Find your happiness because it sure as hell isn't in his hands."

I went over to the swing. He followed me after a few seconds.

"You suffer from anxiety ?" Huh?

Is it that obvious ? I thought i was managing it pretty well. Ugh i hate this. Can't he go back to being sad ? Actually no. That was hectic. At least he is shifting his sadness right? Yes

"Whatever. Can we go back now ? It's late and I'm getting cold." I say after some time of me ignoring his question and swinging away.

"Haha okay ,lets bounce blue" he takes my hand and leads us back to the car and we take off once again.

During the car ride back home he asks me a question I dreaded.

"You mind if i sleep over at yours tonight ?" No no nooo , why did he have to ruin such a good day ? Stupid GEM.

"Umm , why ?" I hope I don't sound rude.

"Haha , you seriously going to ask me that ? I mean , why the hell not blue?"

"I dont know. Maybe because you have your own bed, IN YOUR OWN DAMN HOME?" I emphasised

"Nah. I just want to spend some extra time with you , thats all."

Oh. Well , that was unexpected. What do I do now? If I let him sleep over then he'll keep asking me some dumb questions that are none of his business and I'll probably end up planning his death and we dont want that now , do we? Nah-ah !

"I dont know GEM" I reply softly

"I promise not to get on your nerves or anything. I'll be on my best behaviour. " he looks like such a baby right now!

"Ugh fine! Just , behave , please." I give in

"Yay!!!" He exclaims and does a little dance which looks stupid

I chuckle and let his stupid ass be. The rest of the drive home is really chilled with us jamming to some hip hop and him making some stupid jokes here and there.