The Spirit Guardians Oneshots

Nightmares

Rating: T

Prompt: One Sentence Prompt: "You had a nightmare, tell me what it was about so I can fix it."

Summary: Lillian has another nightmare about the death of Irene. Thankfully, Mitsuki is nearby to help.

Ships: Lillian/Mitsuki

Timeline: 1 year after Chapter 47 of Liberated

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Lillian woke with a jolt. Her hand, resting on her abdomen over the covers, was quivering. Despite the fact it was snowing outside and the air was cool inside her bedroom, she was coated in a thin film of sweat, and her heart was pounding. Lillian slowly got ahold of her bearings and placed a hand to her face, finding that it was wet with tears.

The nightmare came back to Lillian in an instant, and she found herself trembling. She had been holding Irene in her arms as she bled to death. That moment was Cassie's nightmare, not Lillian's, but she still dreamt about it at times, reliving the reality of Irene's death over and over. The dreams were subsiding some as time passed. After all, it had been a year now since the fateful day. But every once in a while, the nightmare crept up onto Lillian again.

Lillian let out a shout as Mitsuki grasped onto her arm. She turned, finding her girlfriend looking at her curiously.

"Are you okay?"

"Fine," Lillian lied, trying to keep down the chalkiness coating her throat. She was on the verge of tears, but the last thing she wanted to let Mitsuki know was that she was crying about Irene.

"You were thrashing around in your sleep, and you cried out once or twice," Mitsuki said.

Lillian slowly pushed her hand away. "I'm okay," she said, turning on her side so her back was facing Mitsuki. Even she couldn't hold back the sniffles that came with fresh tears.

"You're such a bad liar, Lillian," Mitsuki said, almost angrily. "You had a nightmare. Tell me what it was about so I can fix it."

"I told you, I'm fine," Lillian responded, clutching the covers close to her. "Just go sleep in your own bed for once if I'm bothering you." At this moment, she wished Mitsuki was in her own bedroom. They frequently spent the night together. It seemed strange not to by this point, but Lillian wanted nothing more than to be alone at this moment. Mitsuki wouldn't understand the pain she was feeling.

"It was about Irene, wasn't it?" Mitsuki asked quietly.

Lillian was quiet in response. She tangled her legs together and shut her eyes, but her body was still trembling. She thought maybe she could will herself to fall back asleep, but an orange glow distracted her as Mitsuki turned the lamp on.

"N-No. Turn it off, please. I don't want you to see me crying," Lillian begged, her words trembling in her throat. She felt Mitsuki pat her shoulder once before getting out of bed and exiting the room. Lillian sat up on her elbows, utterly confused. Was she actually going to her bedroom like Lillian had proposed? Maybe she was angry.

Lillian let her head sink back into her pillow and let out a low groan. There were tears streaming down her face now, which she wiped haphazardly with her hands. Mitsuki had been gone ten minutes now, and Lillian wasn't sure if she was ever going to come back.

But the door swung open, and Lillian's heartbeat slowly calmed. She kept her gaze up at the ceiling, not wanting Mitsuki to see the swollenness of her eyes. She felt her girlfriend's weight on the bed beside her and a tap on her shoulder. Lillian turned, watching as Mitsuki shoved a box of tissues in her face.

Lillian sniffed slightly and sat up, beginning to blow her nose. As soon as she moved the tissue away, Mitsuki held a glass of water to her, which Lillian drank slowly. She still managed to choke on it a bit though. She was surprised Mitsuki didn't ridicule her for it but instead hit her back as she coughed. They still had not managed to speak a word to each other.

As Lillian sipped some more water, she heard crinkling and saw Mitsuki pull out a bag of chocolates.

"I snuck some from downstairs," she said quietly. "A little midnight snack always helps. It is three in the morning, but still..."

"I don't really want any," Lillian admitted sadly.

Mitsuki was already unwrapping a piece and dropped it in her hand. Lillian stared at it in curiosity, wanting a taste, but not feeling up for a snack. When she saw Mitsuki eat some beside her, she gave in and took a bite, almost immediately feeling better when the sweetness took over her mouth.

They sat there quietly for a little bit, eating small chocolates. Barely any sound could be heard besides the crinkling of wrappers that they gathered in a pile between them. Lillian kept her gaze forward on her toes, trying not to look her girlfriend in the eyes. Lillian was slowly getting ahold of her bearings again. She wrapped her arms around her legs and quietly murmured, "Thank you."

Lillian finally turned to stare at Mitsuki, watching as concern reflected in her girlfriend's face. Mitsuki gathered up the chocolate wrappers and got up briefly to throw them in the trash before the bed shifted with her weight as she sat once more.

Mitsuki's hand traced over Lillian's before sitting lightly on top of it. Lillian turned her head, finding that Mitsuki was staring at her small hand pressed over Lillian's larger, slimmer hand. Mitsuki's fingers were moving slightly in a comforting manner on top of Lillian's own hand

"Do you want to talk about it? Or should we go back to sleep?" Mitsuki asked softly.

"I know I didn't actually see her die," Lillian murmured. "But sometimes I dream that I did. I witnessed it tonight. I could feel the blood on my fingers. It was so warm, but her body was ice cold."

Mitsuki was quiet in response, listening intently.

"I don't really want to talk about it. Because you'll..."

Mitsuki quickly removed her hand and scooted closer. Her head suddenly whipped toward Lillian, and in a flash, Mitsuki's lips were on Lillian's. Lillian's eyes were widened in surprise, and she watched in curiosity as Mitsuki pulled apart.

"I don't care. I don't care, Lillian. Maybe I never lost someone close like that, but I've lost parts of my family to the violence too. Please don't hold back because it's about her. I don't want you to think I'm mad. Please talk to me when something is bothering you," Mitsuki said, grasping tightly onto Lillian's hand.

"C-Could you hold me, then?" Lillian asked.

Mitsuki slowly slunk down onto the bed and motioned for Lillian to scoot forward. Lillian pressed her head into Mitsuki's chest and felt her girlfriend's arms wrap around her as Lillian clutched the fabric of Mitsuki's pajama shirt. She was trembling again, but the tears never fully arose because Mitsuki was pressing kisses to the top of her head and rubbing her back with such tender care.

"I love you so much," Lillian murmured.

Mitsuki placed her hand on Lillian's cheek, causing Lillian to lift her head upward to stare into Mitsuki's eyes. Mitsuki smiled warmly before Lillian leaned her chin up to kiss her.

"That time of our life is over now. We're safe," Mitsuki said quietly, now beginning to string her fingers through Lillian's soft hair. It was true that every once in a while Lillian would have a nightmare about losing Mitsuki, but she often kept those entirely to herself. She wondered if Mitsuki did the same.

"Can I turn the light off now?" Mitsuki asked.

"Yes, but can you still—"

Mitsuki sat upward to turn the lamp off before slinking back down and embracing Lillian once more. Mitsuki traced her lips against Lillian's forehead gently.

"I won't let go," Mitsuki promised. "Go to sleep."

Lillian grinned to herself and nuzzled closer to Mitsuki before letting her eyes shut. No longer was she haunted by Irene's pale, unseeing eyes or her cold, limp body. Instead, her body felt warm. She felt comforted. All she could feel were Mitsuki's warm arms encompassing her with the promise to never let go.