Lonely (a falsettos college AU)

Honesty

I promise that it's gonna get good next chapter

;)

Yo, if anyone's actually reading this, please can you comment and say hi because I'm high key lonely right now, that's why I named the book lonely.

Quick maths
Chapter Text
Silence.

It was the silence that got to him.

Whizzer felt nauseous, his forehead began to get slick with sweat and his breathing became jagged. His Mom pulled the car to a standstill, and he leapt out of the car, retching the remaining alcohol out of his system. He shook from the cold and the notion that he just told his Mom the biggest secret he had ever kept, and then he began to cry.

The tears streamed down his face and all of the 11 pm shadows blurred into one deep darkness that made his stomach hurt. It felt as though his heart had shattered into millions of pieces, and he was alone in the world.

And then he felt her arms wrap around him, and the pain overcame him;

No matter how bad it hurts for your heart to break, it hurts more to fix it. The millions of fragments never fit in the same place as previously, they leave tiny gaps and holes in the structure that weaken it, that cause the owner to build new, much higher walls to protect it and throw their own grenades over to tear down others' walls.

And that's how Whizzer felt when his Mom took him in her arms and engulfed him in a hug that he did not expect. And then she did something even more unexpected, she too began to cry with him.

' I'm sorry it hurt you so much to tell me, but I thought we trusted each other.'

Her tears became stronger and the wind began to whip around the both of them as they embraced. It felt like hours later when they finally detached themselves from One another. Their tears began to slow and Whizzer looked down at his Mother,

'Mom' his voice began to softly crack in pain ' it's not that I don't trust you, it's that I don't trust anyone else' he smiled a small, slight smile, unusual too his normal cocky grin.

She smiled up at him, in a lonely fashion that said more words than she could ever speak. And with that, the uncomfortable silence between them diminished and they took their places in the car before heading home.

'When were you going to tell me?'
'Before I went off for College'

And so the endless questions began, making an emotionally, and physically, exhausted Whizzer regret all life decisions he had ever made.

'How long have you known?'

And then Whizzer explained everything, even the painfully embarrassing things that under normal circumstances he would refuse to talk to his Mother about.

'Momma, I'm so sorry'
'It's okay, just answer one more question, for me, please'

He took a deep breath and felt his eyes slowly droop,

'Shoot'
'How often have you been doing this?'
'Pretty much every week since I was sixteen , I just enjoy sex , but I always stick to my rules, I'm always safe'

And suddenly his heart felt light and fluttered With the realisation that he wouldn't have to sneak around anymore. Honesty felt good.