-TOBIAS-
"he's gone" tris says. We are standing in the Beuru lobby, The others all went somewhere else when we arrived from Chicago to give me and tris some space. I hold her close while she crys on my shoulder, clutching fistfulls of my t-shirt.
"he's gone. They all are."
"I know." I say. I don't really know what to say at times like this. People walk past and look at us, probably wondering who we are.
"I know they are, but they loved you tris, it was their way to show you." She curls into me, her head on my chest sobbing silently. I wish I could take this pain for her. It's not like I ever had a loving family so I can't imagine what she is going through right now.
"I shouldn't have let him go..."
"Tris he knew what he was doing. He did what he had to do." she merely nods.
"let's go," I say, not really wanting to have such a private conversation in the middle of the lobby.
I put my arm around her and we slowly walk back to the dormentrys.
+ + +
"Are you sure you want to go in?" I say, not sure if she can handle the pressure of the others right now.
"I'm sure. I'm OK"
"okay," I say before pulling her into a hug.
"how do I look," she says.
I crouch down and lean into her,
"Tough as nails" I say. she attempts a smile although it doesn't really work.
"okay, let's go." she says before pushing open the dormentry door and walking in.
She is so strong, I've always admired that about her. After she has almost lost everything she still has the courage to walk into a room where everyone will be looking at her and questioning her.
+ + +
-TRIS-
I walk in clutching Tobias' hand tight as he rubs circles with his thumb on the back of mine. As I walk in I see Christina sitting on the bed next to mine holding a pillow. I smile at Tobias before going to sit next to Chris. She gives me these sad puppy dog eyes which anoy me a bit although I try to ignore them.
"you good?" she askes
I simply nod, not trusting myself not to break down if I open my mouth.
She may be one of my best friends but I refuse to let anybody see me this weak.
+ + +
-TOBIAS-
After leaving tris' side I walk over to join Cara.
"I've taken Zeke and Hana to see Uriah. There still there now."
"OK thanks,"
"You know it's not your fault don't you? What happened with Uriah I mean?"
"Nows not really the time" I say simply. She nods before walking off.
I walk over to Tris briskly "I'm just going to see Uri, ok?"
"OK" she says as she gets up and walks over to me. I must give her a worried look because she looks at me and says
"I'm coming. " I nod in reply. Its fine by me, I don't want her anywhere but by my side but she needs her rest.
"And me" Christina says before following us out of the door.
+ + +
-TRIS-
Me, Tobias and Christina are outside Uriah's room. His Mum and Zeke are inside on either side off him. Hana, their mum is crying quietly although I can not read the expression on Zekes face. It looks like something swallowed him hole.
I don't have to look at Tobias to know how he is feeling. His hand is shaking ever so slightly and he is breathing deeply. I know how guilty he feels. I know all too well.
I grab his hand and squeeze it tight. He glances at me quickly as if to say thankyou. I know that now is not the time for words so I put my head on his shoulder and my arm around him. He pulls me closer to his side and clutches my hand. I look over at Christina and see tears in her eyes. She looks at me for a moment and I smile a slight, apologetic smile.
A minute later Tobias let's go of me and walks away slowly. I know he needs me to follow him but I also know that Christina needs me here. I look between him and Chris momentarily but Chris catches my eye.
"go, I'm fine"
"are you sure?"
She nods. I squeeze her shoulder gently before going to find Tobias.
I find him standing in front of a big sculpture outside the cafeteria. His eyes are glassy and his fists are clenched but I know he won't let the tears fall.
I walk up to him and he squeezes me tightly. We both need it. I bury my head in his chest and he burys his in my neck, gently stroking my hair.
+ + +
-TOBIAS-
I do admire tris' strength of character, she just lost all the family she has and she comes and comforts me.
I don't deserve her. But I'm selfish.
That night we push out beds even closer together and I sleep with my arm around her waist.
When morning comes she is curled into my chest still sleeping. I don't want to risk waking her so I lay very still just watching her sleep.
"Mmmrrmmm" she grumbles, waking up.
"Morning" I say quietly not wanting to wake anyone else. She puts her arm around me and pulls me closer to her. Or herself closer to me I don't know. I kiss her forehead lightly and run my fingers through her hair. She kisses me lightly on the lips before getting comfortable once more.
I don't deserve this girl.
"good morning" she says. Obviously a bit too loud as seconds later someone throws a pillow at us.
"Shut up" they yell. I chuckle quietly to myself before deciding to keep the pillow.
+ + +
-TRIS-
Today me, Tobias and Cara plan to go back to Chicago to speak to Johanna. I don't know what the future holds for me at this point. I know that in Chicago there are too many bed memories for Tobias but I'm starting to think that there are too many for me here. At first I thought I belonged here. After I found out it is where my mother came from. But now I don't know.
After I get breakfast I head back to the dormentry. As I get there Tobias comes out of the bathroom, his hair still shiny and wet.
"Did you get me any?" he asks jokingly. I walk over and kiss him running my hands through his hair. As I pull back I smile.
"Nope this is mine, get you own lazy." I say before kissing him again.
+ + +
The drive to Chicago was quiet. Amar offered to take us. No one new what to say. Chris would have known what to say to lighten the mood but she decided to stay with Zeke and Uriah.
When we arrive at Chicago, Johanna is waiting for us. As the city has not yet alected new leaders, Johanna has taken up the role momentarily.
"Welcome back" she says. I nod to acnolage her while Cara greats her with a hug.
"We have a lot to discuss."
YOU ARE READING
Survival (Fourtris)
Teen Fiction-DISCLAIMER- all rights and stuff belong to Veronica Roth who wrote the series. This is a divergent fanfic without the plumiting depression the ending puts you into. Allegiant has happened only with a slightly different ending... Caleb went into...
