summer romance (e.d.)

thirty-eight

ethan

the humid, buggy, and hot july night makes waiting by the gate for anna slightly miserable.

at 12:01, she shows up, slightly out of breath.

"hey, sorry," she immediately remarks. "i accidentally fell asleep at 9. woke up at 11:56."

"it's fine," i laugh lightly. "why're you so out of breath?"

she looks at me like i'm stupid. "i ran here. and i play golf, not cross country or some sh—"

her sentence is cut off by the outside lights flickering on. i freeze immediately, feeling my blood run cold.

"what? no one should be awake," anna whispers urgently. "what do we do? ethan, if we get caught out here then it's over for us."

"shhh," i say, bringing my finger to my lips. "do as i say, make zero noise, okay?"

she nods, sealing her lips. i duck us down in the bushes beside the gate, pushing her in front of me. her hand finds mine in the dark as another flood light turns on.

"okay," i whisper, grazing her ear with my mouth. "we sneak in through the back, okay? we just have to run from here to the property line and hop the fence. i think... i think my mom knows we're out here."

she shudders at my words, but does as i say. we quietly creep along side the bushes, trying to make it to the property line before someone finds us.

"i feel like a robber," she whispers in the dark when we're half way there.

i laugh a little. "kind of. we're breaking in, but not stealing anything, i guess."

"just come to the guest house with me," she whispers back. "it'll make so much less noise than you having to sneak back into the house."

"but what if my mom checks my room?"

i hear her sigh. "good point. just tip toe, okay? promise me that you won't get caught, and that you'll be careful."

"i promise. hurry up, we're almost there."

we round the corner of my property line and sigh at the sight of the tall fence.

"easy," anna states. "give me a boost."

i raise an eyebrow. "so you think you can just climb over that with ease? anna—"

the side lights turn on, and i see a flicker of fear cast across her face. "ethan," she grits. "give me a boost, i'm not tall enough."

taking a deep breath, i bend down a little bit and hold out my hands. she puts her sneakered foot in my grasp and i lift her up.

she grabs the top of the fence and swings her other leg around to the other side.

"okay," she says with a strangled voice. "need any help?"

i look at the fence and shake my head. "i got this."

my vans don't have much grip as i try to scale the fence, and anna drops to the ground below me, onto the other side.

"hurry up!" she whispers, checking nervously over her shoulder.

with one last push, i launch myself over the fence and land with a thud on the hard ground.

"are you okay?" anna asks, crouching down to inspect my fall.

"i'm okay," i groan, rolling to get up.

"shhh, hurry up."

we check in both directions before sprinting across the yard and into the back. the patio lights aren't turned on, thank god, which gives me a little time to sneak in through the back door.

"bye, i'll see you tomorrow, okay?" i rush out, giving her a quick kiss on the forehead.

"wait ethan," she says. "what about your clubs? your bag is up by the gate."

i reach up to tug at the tips of my hair and pace slightly. "it's fine. i'll wake up early to get them. sneak to the guest house quietly, okay?"

she nods. "i promise."

i wait until i no longer see her silhouette in the dark as she runs across the lawn.

then i realize i have to sneak in as well.

sighing, i check the patio door to see if it's locked.

it is.

and i never lock in, since i always sneak out to see anna. no one ever checks to see if it's locked because my mom assumes it always is.

she's onto something, and my first clue should've been what she said to me after dinner.

"why were you at the beach today with anna?" she asked nonchalantly, rearranging a magazine stack on the coffee table.

i shifted in my seat. "just... wanted to feed the seagulls."

she gave me a doubtful look and said, "remember what i told you? distance? anna is a sweet girl, but she isn't what i've always pictured for you."

"what do you mean?" i asked, trying to stop my voice from becoming defensive.

"anna isn't... california," she finally answered, looking me in the eyes. "she doesn't live here, she isn't a member of the club, and she doesn't have... connections."

"wait," i said, furrowing my eyebrows. "you want me to be with a girl based off their connections and social status? mom, that sounds insane. i'm not doing that."

"so you admit you and anna have a thing?"

"i'm not admitting anything," i relied harshly. "i'm simply saying that i'm not someone that needs to have their future planned out by their mom. why don't you trust me to make my own decisions?"

"i do!" she argued, throwing up her hands. "i just wish it wasn't with anna."

"what's wrong with anna?" i asked loudly.

"nothing," she stated firmly. "i love anna. i already told you that i think she's a sweet, smart, and responsible girl. i just don't want you with her."

"i'm not!" i argued.

"i'm just saying that you guys seem to be spending a lot of time together, and that's good. as friends. if it's anything else, then i think we have a problem."

"you're being controlling," i said straight up. "i'm 18 years old. i'm an adult."

"until you're financially stable by yourself and don't live under my roof, you're not an adult," she smiled stiffly at me. "and i don't see you straying from your amex black card anytime soon, honey."

i scoffed. "i hate that you say that. what if i want to? what if i want to be cut off from your money? i don't need it, mom."

she took one step closer to me, reaching up to fix my hair. i flinched away from her touch. "college doesn't pay for itself. gas doesn't pay for itself. car payments don't pay for themselves. you don't realize how hard it is, ethan. i suggest you lose the entitlement you think you've deserved, and do as i say for once."

without leaving me time to argue, she brushed past me in a brisk manner, leaving me stunned in the living room.

as the memory plays in my brain, i wonder—

— how am i supposed to explain this to anna?