Remember me (a Kylo Ren story)

VII.

Kylo and I turn our heads and see Rey, with her hand outstretched and clutching Luke's lightsaber. A shock filled expression washes over both Kylo and Rey's faces. I use this moment of distraction to charge at Kylo, my anger fueling my attacks. He barely blocks my attack, my saber crashes against his. A memory of us battling at the Jedi temple the night he left encases our minds as our sabers collide. 

"You should've joined me! You would have impressed Snoke with your ability." He pushes me back, rolling over my shoulder to stand upright. "I'll never join you Kylo! You killed my Ben! He was all I had and you destroyed him!" The pain of him leaving me all those years ago resurfaces, my heartbreak and rage growing. The feeling was overwhelming, and I liked it.

The wounds to Kylo's side and arm were affecting him greatly, his blows growing weaker. I raised my saber, swinging it fiercely at his body, slicing his thigh. He falls onto his back, my stance towering over him. "Ben Solo was the only man I ever loved, and you took that from me." The pleasurable passion continues to arise from within, it scares me. Kylo crawls backward, pulling himself to his feet as I draw closer and closer. 

"I had no choice. Ben had to be destroyed in order for me to fulfill my destiny. I never wanted to leave you." The pain flashes in his eyes. I deactivated my saber, tossing it to the side and extending my hand.

"Ben, please. Come home." My eyes burn into his. A picture of me in the Jedi temple, the night he left floods his mind; my face wet with tears as he boards the ship. His facial expression changes, from pain, to confliction, and then anger. "No! You will only hold me back!" Kylo slashes his weapon across my chest and up my left shoulder. My body is sent flying backwards, the pain in my chest was excruciating, but nothing compared to the emotional damage he's given me.

"You said you didn't want to hurt me." My voice is cracked and pain seeps through it. I cower away from him. Regret fills his eyes, he reaches for me, fingers barely grazing my knee before he is flown back. The blue light is present and blinds me. Rey stands before me, the weapon held tight with both hands. I look over to see Kylo face down in the snow, his gloved hands pushing himself up. "Go get Finn and get on the Falcon." Rey's voice is firm. "No, you can't fight him alone." I use my right arm to push myself off the frozen ground. "You're already hurt, you won't be much use." She points to Finn's unconscious body.

 "Go." She turns to Kylo, his fiery rage emerging. "He always takes a small step with his right foot before he attacks, use it to your advantage." I say, jogging to Finn. I pull him up and use my good shoulder to hoist him over it. The sounds of the two weapons smacking against each other rings in my ears. I'm about sixty feet from the ongoing fight when I hear Kylo speak. "You need a teacher! Let me show you the ways of the force." Fear floods my body.

"Rey, don't listen to him! He's trying to trick you, the force is strong in you. Use it, let it consume you. Focus." My thoughts echo in her head. I turn around to see them pushing against each, before Rey dominates and slashes him. The wound stretching from his forehead down his cheek and the right side of his shoulder and chest. The planet shakes beneath us as the foundation starts to crumble away.

 A massive crack slides in between Rey and Kylo, ending their fight. Rey dashes to Finn and I, helping me carry him. The roar of an engine swoops in. The Falcon lands thirty feet from us. Chewie runs down the ramp. He groans as he takes Finn from us, my body collapsing into Rey, rendering me unconscious.

"You will only hold me back!" 

The image of him slashing me with his saber awakes my slumber. My eyes water from the blinding light overhead. "She's awake! Emery!" I follow the sound with my eyes. Poe, Rey, and Leia all stand before me. Leia's hand finds mine, squeezing it as she lets a tear escape her eyes. "I thought I had lost you too." She leans in and places a warm peck to my forehead. 

"I'm sorry, I didn't bring him home, and I'm so sorry about Han. He was the only thing I had to a real father." My voice is trembling but no tears come. My heart has suffered so much agony. "Sh, you saved the galaxy. You saved your sister and Finn. I'm so proud of you Emery." She cups my cheek. "How long have I been out?" I ask trying to figure out what day it is.

 "You've been unconscious for five days. The medical staff deemed it was to keep you asleep so your body could recover. Kylo's saber came inches from hitting your heart." Poe explains, walking towards me. Poe's eyes glisten with tears threatening to spill. "Come on, let's get you up and into some real clothes. We have something to show you." He's gentle hands grasp my back and pull me upward. He gives me a small hug before exiting the room with Leia.

Rey hands me a pile of clothing; my usual attire of a black pants, a white long sleeve with a deep green vest, my brown boots still sitting on the floor. "Here's your saber, I'll be outside if you need help. I'm so glad you're okay." Rey embraces me, a whimper slips out of my mouth as her tight squeeze pushes against my wounded chest. As I remove the papery medical gown I finally see the damage Kylo has done to me. The cut runs from the tip of my left shoulder, diagonally across my chest and ends just before my breast. He almost broke my heart. 

"Wouldn't be the first time." My hands run over the skinny strip of medical tape, holding my torn skin together, stopping in the middle where my crystal hung. "My necklace! It's gone, it must have broken when Kylo attacked me." My heart sinks. "That's all I had left of Ben." I push the aching feeling in my chest away as I pull on my clothes, then clipping my saber onto my belt. I begin braiding my hair back, before exiting the room.

My feet lead me to the Command Center, all eyes landing on me as I stride to the middle, and stand next to Leia. "So what did you want to show me?" I ask. Leia moves to the side as R2-D2 rolls over to me. "R2? You haven't been out of low power mode since Master Luke left." I look up to Rey walking over. "Go on, show her." She smiles as R2 projects a map, with a piece missing. "BB-8, now it's your turn." Poe instructs the droid, who moves next to R2. BB-8 projects the incomplete map to Luke, the piece moving and blending with R2's holograph. The map molds together, finally as one piece. 

"We found Luke." Leia's voice is filled with joy.