Journal of the Amnesiac Wizard: A Setosorcerer/FyreUk/GoldSolace Story

- Entry #2: Rowan -

— Entry #2: May 22nd - Monday —

So I found out why I refused stairs since the Fyre brothers let me live in their tower. At first, I was just following the healer's orders to take it easy and not push it and that meant to avoid stairs at all costs. But after going up only a few steps, not even a full flight, my leg is killing me.

I'm not really shocked that my leg is sore, after all, they told me that it might be a permanent injury that will affect me for the rest of my life. It just means I need to remaster levitation magic so I can just float up the steps and not have to bother with walking.

But to update my list of what I know about myself:
- My name is Seto (Or at least I think it is)
-I'm at the magic level of an Elite Master Wizard
-I'm around 21 or 22 (Don't quote me on that)
-I have some type of military background, being a highly decorated soldier or officer
-I have the markings of being some type of War Hero
-I may not even come from Vienna but from a different world entirely
-My magic type is unknown in Vienna, meaning I practiced a magic type that hasn't been recorded

Longer list but still a short one when you think about it. Went from four things I know about myself to seven, yippie for me I guess...

I'm trying to stay positive, as least as much as I can since it is probably the only thing I have going for me at the moment. But how exactly can someone with amnesia be positive?

I suppose I could just hope that my memories will return but that's what people tell me who have all their memories in their head. They just...don't get it.

I feel like I lost who I was and trying to figure out who I am right now is...it's hard. What if the person I become isn't the person that the people who once knew me can stand? What if they leave me because they don't like the new me?

That thought does frighten me a lot. The thought of returning back to the people who knew me only to have them see me as a completely different person and they don't like it and leave.

It's hard to be positive when you have so much negativity in your head and very little support from others who care about you.

Sure, the Fyre Brothers are there for me but they only support me out of pity for what has happened to me, not friendship. I know my place in their eyes and it's not a good place. And if I'm being honest here, I don't blame them. I've been a burden to them all, I know I have.

Phil, Tom, Matt, and James all have an academy to run and a war to win, I'm a distraction to them. I...

No, I shouldn't go down this road, positive, think positive...

I have noticed lately that when it comes to certain topics like magic and fighting, I tend to say things subconsciously. Like my brain is programmed with the answers but I just don't know they are there. And what I subconsciously say surprises me at times, sure I agree with my words, but I just don't understand what made me think that way at one time. And some of the stuff I say can be dark and cold, emotionless almost.

Phil thinks that it is the highly decorated soldier in me showing while Tom thinks that it is the result of seeing too many wars. I suppose both could explain what is going on.

The more I figure out about myself, the more intrigued I am. Sure, the details I tend to find out are small and might really mean nothing. but it is those small details that mean a lot to me since it is me figuring myself out. Small details like what type of foods I like or stuff that interests me. But the details I really want to know is what type of decorated soldier was I, what made me a war hero, and what happened to me that made me end up on the grounds of Fyre Academy. It's those that never get any answers.