Dear vic,
I saw you yesterday. I was with mike and he was giving me drumming tips.
She was there.
She's quite beautiful. I could see why you're with her.
You smiled at me and ruffled my hair. I don't think you remember, but I asked you to stop doing that.
After I left your house I walked home.
It was rainy and I didn't really mind. Probably because I felt like rain as well. The gloominess and hopelessness. It all seemed to fit right in with my mood.
I know I'm too committed to the thought of you.
And I'm just a hobby to you. You can Leave me when you'd like but I'll always be here when you get back from funner things.
I keep thinking about you and the only way to not feel sad is to stop. But I'm stuck.
Because you don't drown by falling in the water. It's staying there that kills you.
And it's like I've got a weight tied to my foot that enables me to swim back up for air.
So I stay here and watch you with her and watch myself deteriorate slowly.
But I'll live.
My lungs were made for drowning.
YOU ARE READING
Deadly tendencies (fuenciado)
FanfictionVic, i'm writing to you even though i know you'll never read it. i love you and i just want it to be enough. Trigger warning: self harm and blood