This felt wrong. It had only been about three months but the place that Jisung had learned to called home, felt nothing of the sort. Not even the breeze blowing through his now soft brown hair didn't put him at ease. If Jisung were being honest, he felt like the past few months had been a bad dream. 95 days and not one single text back from the one he wanted so badly to talk to most. He left endless 2 am voicemails and 'I love you,'s in her texts. Silence. It's all he ever got in return. It tore him to pieces every time but he never stopped. He knew he could fix it. How, he didn't know. There were so many things he wanted to say and express but he couldn't. The circumstances just weren't right. He had no choice but to suppress his emotions and thoughts. He wanted to give her the space she so desperately needed. He had to.
With the soft shake of a hand on his shoulder, Jisung was brought out of his daze. He gave a quick nod to the oldest in the drivers seat and unbuckled his seatbelt, exiting the car. As he made his way up to the front door, he recounted all the times he had to gently kick the door open because of the small girl with the biggest heart taking up the space in his arms due to always being so damn tired. There was even a scuff at the bottom of the door to remind him. As he entered the home, he was met by a few of the friends he hadn't seen since they left. They all gave him small smiles, hugs and reassuring words. As he pulled away from his last hug with the youngest of the girls, he received a soft nudge.
"She's in your room."
Jisung blinked in response and slowly trudged up the never ending flight of stairs, turning his body to the left. The door at the end of the hall taunting him. Jisung had called dibs on the room as soon as they saw the house simply for the fact that he knew his girlfriend of 6 months at the time would absolutely love it. The sunsets were incredible and he knew how much she loved them. Of course, the rest of the group gave in and let them have it. It came as a surprise to the girl, though, as she had no idea he knew that about her or would even take it into consideration. She would open the curtains and watch the sunset every single night, even when Jisung wasn't there. It reminded her of him. She felt at peace. He wondered if she still felt that way. His nearly silent footsteps were all but heard as he made his descent down the long hallway. It felt as if there was a dark cloud lingering over his head. As he was lifting his hand up to knock on the white door, he was interrupted by the sound of muffled singing coming from inside the room. He pressed his ear against the cool wood and closed his eyes. His girlfriend knew very well that she could not sing but that definitely didn't stop her. Although, she would never sing in front of others. Only when she was all alone. But this time, she wasn't.
Jisung reaches his hand down and wrapped his cold hand around the doorknob, twisting it, the cool air from the room hitting him like a ton of bricks as he pushes the door open. His eyebrows furrowed as he looked around the room that used to make him feel safe. Everything was out of it's place and the whole room was messy. Even the small girl lying on their shared bed, facing the other way, felt out of place to him. Her hair was no longer pink and she wore her own clothes. That was a rare occasion with Jisung around. He couldn't count how many times he would ask the girl where a certain item of clothing was only to find her wearing it. She practically lived in his clothes. He loved it. Jisung was so distraught at the sight that he almost didn't notice the fact that she was lying on his side of the bed. His heartbeat slowed once he noticed that small but significant detail. His presence still hadn't been noticed so he quietly closed the door behind him and took a closer look around the room. Everything had been moved around. The bed was now next to the sliding door that led out to the patio and everything else was on the opposite wall where the bed used to stand. He noticed there were multiple paintings stacked up against the wall in the corner closest to the door he was standing in front of. With a quick glance to make sure the girl wasn't looking, he walked over and crouched down, his fingertips slowly running over the edges of each canvas, taking time to look over each and every one. Most of them were just a bunch of dark colors splattered and spewed against the white background but the last one contained the view of a soft sunset with a certain grey haired boy's side profile adorning the textured material. It wasn't good by any means but it made Jisung's stomach fill with butterflies. As he stood back up and turned around, he was met with dark brown eyes matching his own only a few feet away. This was different, though. The eyes he remembered as being soft and bright were now dull and decorated underneath with dark circles. Nothing like what he remembered. He didn't notice while she was lying down but the girl looked much smaller than before. Was it possible for people to shrink? It had to be. He felt as though he was looking at a complete stranger. She didn't look like home.
"Jij."
