Begin again. (A spn fanfic)

Chapter 13

My shoulder slammed against the hard wood door. When it didn't budge I slammed into it over and over. Running back and forth. When it finally flew open, I invaded the space. Carefully stepping between the pews. I slowly came to the alter where a bible littered in dust lay open, unused. I stepped down and walked to the backrooms, my gun raised the entire time. I flew into rooms, pointing into every corner.

When I had almost reached the last room, a clank came from behind me and turned. I was slammed into an open door, blacking me out on impact.

64 hours earlier

"Omen alert!" I called out, my brothers rushing into the room. I pointed to a file and read, "Recent weather in Brent, Alabama has been ridiculous. Plus, meet Marissa Ridison, she had her damn eyes burned out of her scull and Patrick Dunning, insides liquefied."

"Well it could always just be demons." Dean pondered and I set down the hands on the table replying, "Well whatever it is I would really like to hunt something, anything to get my mind off this." Sam and Dean looked to each other and I asked, "What? What is it?"

"It's just, it's safer in here and..." He paused as I groaned and rolled my eyes. "We still haven't talked about yesterday." He finished, in a low whisper. I looked up, "And we aren't going to talk about it. I'm going to get my blade and both you sons of bitches better be outside, ready."

I left, grabbing my knife from my shelf and returned to the living room. I walked in, surprised by the angel warding chalked out on the walls. "No!" I shouted as my brothers slammed the door shut. I ran to the metal, slamming my fists against it. There was no way I'm getting out. Rushing to my room, I dialed Dean and screamed into the phone, "Dean! Don't do this!"

"Sorry sis. We'll get the angel after you and be home before dinner." He replied smugly. "Dean you need me! You're never going to survive this not without me! Just let me out." I pleaded, tears welling in my eyes. I had to do this, I had to protect my family and survive this.

"Can't do that," Dean said and I heard the engine start. "Dean don't hang up just let me out! Let me help!" I shouted and Dean whispered, "Good bye." I heard the click of phone, he hung up. I screamed and through my phone across the room, making it shatter into a million pieces. My light exploded to as I stormed out of my room and to the center of the warm room.

I stood there in the middle, breathing heavily, my eyes closed, and I focused. I focused on my brothers calling me Mads, my anger and my pain, Crowley taunting me, Cass trying to make jokes, and I focused on my death. Being gone. I took a deep breath and squeezed my hands into fists. I heard shattering of vases, light flickering behind my closed eye-lids, then it came, the splintering of plaster and metal. Then it went silent. I opened my eyes, and took in my surroundings.

Everything was broken. Lights, vases, the computers were flickering, beer bottles had smashed, the stair-well even had a jagged line up it. The walls were also included in the disaster. All the angel sigils had nasty scars through them.

Free at last

I stormed to the garage and flicked on the lights, revealing motorcycles galore. Choosing the only one I had the keys for, my own. I started the engine and roared through the open door, and into the cold air.

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I had guessed at my brothers motel choice and asked the front desk if they had seen two men about 30. After I had bribed him to give me a key to the room, I took my leave to their room. I now stood outside, fitting the key perfectly into the door. It was for sure my brothers room, the second the door opened, Dean was out of his bed and threatening to fire the gun.

"Dean, slow down!" Sam shouted, coming from his bed next. Sam carefully walked towards me, his arms raised. I glared at him and sent him spinning over the bed and into the wall. "Sammy!" Dean shouted and looked to me. "What the hell!" He screamed as Sams head popped up.

"You left me there. Trapped in my own home surrounded by things designed to keep me out. This is my fight you jerks! I'm the one dying not you! I'm the one going to Hell not you! If you think for one second that you can keep me trapped and stop me from doing this you obviously don't know me." I screamed.

Sam and Dean just stood there, looking bewildered until Dean spoke, "Your going to Hell?" My lip trembled and I let out a soft sob before saying, "I can't go back to Heaven. Not now not ever. I made a deal with Crowley, my soul goes to the pit when I die. I don't want to die. I don't want to go to Hell Dean." I straightened up and sighed, "But there is no way you are going to stop me from doing this. It's going to happen, I am going to die, I'm going to hell and you can't stop this. I'm going to hell, might as well enjoy the ride."

Sam took shaking steps toward me and swept me into a hug. It suddenly felt like the first time I had seen him 9 months. The first time he hugged me in the damn motel room. He was my brother, they both were and they were going to loose me. Special little me, the one who taunted them, was the mature one, the head hunter. I was going, going, gone.

"Madi I'm not letting you die." Sam mumbled into my hair. I wrapped my arms around his neck and whispered, "I'm sorry Sammy, but you have to let go." He pulled back, my arms still around his neck and I  smiled, "You really need a hair cut." I kissed him on the cheek and turned to Dean, "You sir are going to let me find this angel, you are going to let me fight him and you are going to let me die. You will not make any deals or threaten anybody understand?"

"No way in Hell." Dean mumbled and I tilted my head. "There is no way in Hell that I am just going to let you go Madison. You are my family, my sister and I can't watch you let yourself die. I lost you once, I can't do it again." He finished. I nodded my head and returned, "Two day's ago you were calling me freak and try to heal me. Sometimes I think the only reason I don't split you in half is because I can't have two of you running around and screwing things up."

He chuckled and threw a newspaper at me. "Tornado hit last week, everything demolished except for a abandoned church." Sam explained, folding his arms over his plaid shirt. "You think this is where he is?" I asked, reading the article. "Best damn omen we have." Dean retorted.

"Right, lets go." I prompted and headed for the door. "Woah, hang on princess, we don't know who this guy is or if he is really an angel, we need to be ready. Which also includes a 4 hour sleep sequence." Sam said, hanging onto my shoulder.  I groaned and turned around, "Sleeping, yuck. But when I die, I want you to be there with me."

"Come on, I'll take the floor." Sam offered and ripped the sheets of Deans bed, who soon enough slapped him on the arm. I snuggled into Sam's bed and took in his scent. There was no way I was going to get through the night, knowing I was so close to dying. My stomach did back flips as I waited for Deans light snoring. It was true, I wanted them to be there with me but I couldn't put them in danger.

When I was sure they were both asleep, I slipped on by boots, stuffed the newspaper into my back pocket and headed for the door. Before I could leave I wrote a note on the motel's pad.

'Sam, Dean, I'm sorry for this, but I can't have you messing things up. This is it, my final battle and I'm sorry I couldn't have been better to you these last few days. I love you both, but this is it. My final scene, my time is up.'

A spot suddenly turned damp on the paper and I realized I was crying. Tip-toeing out of the room, I decided to steal the impala, it's quieter than my bike, and drove away, tears silently staining my face. Street-lights glittered over my face until I took a broken trail into a lost forest.

My time is up.

It's over now.

x A/N x

Here it is, her final days. Her time is up and death has begun. What she will face herself will never be the same as having to loose herself to the one thing she never wanted to become. So here it is, her final scene will come next. One last hooray to end it all. Let's do this, might as well enjoy the ride.

Final days and broken homes,

The one who crying hardest of all, Brook