DREAMS..... Make it or Break it !

Change My Mind

Days were pretty good but nights were colder, longer and a little bit scarier for me. As I mentioned earlier I can spend a whole day without my mom but at night I want to be with my mom no matter what happens, I missed mom every night and I cry to be with her. I donno why she sent me here, as it was her decision I had to obey.

My nieces made me forget about everything. They used to make me laugh and banter me saying 'Rahul Dravid', the Indian cricketer also known as 'Mr. Dependent'. I laughed out loud and said, I know he's my 8th grade crush when I did not even know what crush means? That time I only found him smart, handsome in the whole Indian cricket team.

But now everybody knows who is top-on-my-celebrity-crush-list. Both said rhythmically 'Liam Payne', a member of a UK boy band 'One Direction' the most beautiful pain of my life and laughed out loud.

I said, I remember I was doing my homework and dad was watching cricket match like usual, it was West Indies vs. Australia, and Brian Lara was on strike, in the last two deliveries they had to make four runs to win. I thought he'll make two-two runs for winning and then he made a boundary and West Indies won the match against Australia and from that day I started taking interest in cricket.

Recently, while everyone was supporting India in India vs. England match I was supporting England only because of the England cricketer 'Alaistar Cook' I like him too. Sophia interrupted in the middle and said I too. I said I know you are the reason for it, you made me to see Cook and as 'Rohit Sharma' was not playing due to some reasons I supported England. Just for one single man I became an 'outlander'. Everyone abandoned me. Later, when India won the match, I was happy for it and someone taunted me, I must suggest him 'cooking' rather than 'cricketing'. I said nothing. I was like say whatever you want, who cares?

Sooner or later I started loving Delhi and to be here. It seems like I forgot I have a home in Mumbai and I am temporary over here. The thing which really gets on my nerves is Harsh's game GTA 'Vice City'. It's like he is obsessed with it. The moment he enters home after his school he directly turns on the computer to play it and if he wouldn't be able to pass the level, he keeps kicking his heels for Aisha to come back from school. She too comes back from school and starts playing from where he ended and harsh used to watch her playing and sometime when needed he asks me in his childish tone, Maasi please, please come and type 'Aspirin' or else we'll lose.

We three are quite alike few things with each other like reading books. I finished reading 'The alchemist' by Paulo Coelho. I wanted a new one to read. Next day I went to a book shop along with Aisha we searched for few books somewhere Nancy Drew both Aisha and Sophia favorite. I don't like detective stories and if I'll do then I'll prefer 'Hardy Boys'. There were many others. I looked for Ruskin Bond's 'The Night Train at Deoli and Other Stories but there weren't, I've been searching it for years but never get it. I asked the sales boy he said currently we don't have it but if you want you can tell us we'll ordered it, Ma'am and get it for you and told me to write down book and author name. I tirelessly said fine and wrote down the book name and author too. I asked when I will get it. He said within two days. I said thank you and we left.

My brother in law is a doctor and a researcher too in medicines, he even wrote some books on medicines. Whenever I see him, I start reckoning every little thing how I used to tell my whole family that one day I'm going to make you feel proud becoming a doctor. I crushed everyone's dream again. First time I lose because I take it for granted, second time I fell sick and now they again want me to try, the third time?

The following evening, Sophia and Aisha saw me crying alone, they rushed towards me asking what happened. I said nothing. They said something is bothering you inside. What is bothering you? Just speak to us, we will together find some way. You are stressed with something? I started crying out loud in front of them and said why you all want me to try again? I failed twice. What if again I knocked down on the floor?

Both said first of all stop crying and I don't understand why you feel so low about yourself? You are still the BEST. World doesn't ends over here? You aren't less in compare to anyone. Have a positive thinking towards your own self. You know what soon one day you'll be standing tall, you are still the same old 'Surie Malhotra' who used to scream to the whole world saying tomorrow when I'll be doctor; I'll make you all feel proud of me. Where the heck that confidence gone? Where is that 'Surie' who never loses hope? We want you to try again only because we want to see you as a DOCTOR. Why don't you feel the same about yourself what we feel for you? Just one more time, you can do it, believe on us. Just slap onto those faces who said you can never be able to make it happen in real. Think about it and change your mind.

I thought it over and over again and finally I decided to change my mind.....

On the very next day I called mom and said I change my mind. She asked in a very confused manner, about what you changed your mind? I said for which you send me here. I'm ready to try one last time just for all of yours sake. My mom asked me "You okay?" I said I'm fine much more than I was earlier. She sounded so happy that I can't describe. She thanked Sophia and Aisha saying I knew only you guys can change her mind, thanks a ton, I know words won't be enough to thank you all.

Sophia said Oh! Grandma..... Now will you stop thanking us? We did nothing. Seeing her dying every day was just heart tearing. We just opened her eyes and you know what? We too want her to fulfill her dream and everyone's dream. We want her to live her life back like she used to earlier. And I promise you this time she'll going to make it we just have to encourage her every time when she feels low like I won't be able to. She needs our love, attention, care and NO stress. Don't you worry she is Sophia's aunt. You better know what I mean and they both shared a laugh together and hung the phone saying good bye, do take care and have faith on God.

I wanted to go back Mumbai but meanwhile I don't want to leave them too. I was in dilemma to do what and conflict too. Leaving them is like leaving a piece of my heart. Both were saddened by the thought soon I'm going to leave them. We all became habitual of each other. It's so good to have them around. Never gets upset or angry on me when I change the ground. I am so lucky to have them. Our less aunt and nieces, and BFF more. They are like a 'True Friend' of mine. We never fight for anything, share smiles, laughs, talks and dresses too, they are always by my side I wish! We always be BFF forever and we will be for sure.

Dad came back to receive me. He was glad to see me. He announced we are leaving for Mumbai day after tomorrow. Our eyes filled with tears thinking of leaving each other. I started packing up bags. Aisha sadly said, we all will miss you; Sophia never skips a moment of being funny started giving background music and some special effects too and singing 'One Direction Song' to make us to laugh.

Can't believe that you are packing your bags,

Trying so hard not to cry,

Had the best time, now it's the worst time,

But we had to say good bye.

I said stop it guys. One is crying and other giving special effects. I said sorry but I had to and soon I will be here again. Love you and going to miss you badly. Thanks for all your support and for being my inspiration. Thanks for waking me up from my bad dream. Thanks for believing in me when I stopped believing in myself. Thanks for encouraging me. Thanks for giving me another life with new hopes and dreams. I finally understood why mom sent me here, thanks to her truly.

While I was done thanking them, I found both was watching me briefly and clapped their hands and bantered, Ladies and Gentleman! Have a huge round of applause for 'Surie Malhotra' and we expressed our joy and pulled my legs asking nice speech from where did you learn it?

Before leaving them and Delhi, I gifted a peach colored top with the zebra print on the side to the Sophia, an orange and white colored jacket to Aisha and some chocolate to Harsh. I shopped for myself while buying things to gift them along with my sister. Finally, the day arrived when I left them with the tears in my eyes and them too. They waved a last good bye to me from the window. I waved them inside the cab raising my hand up in the air and watched them till they disappeared from my sight.

As the train was leaving the platform and Delhi was going away, all the memories of time spend with my nieces and nephew, all those fun, all those visiting places, all those long nights and my job of making tea in the night I was missing all of them. As the platform was out of sight a tear rolled down my eyes I'm really gonna miss Delhi and my angels too.