Post Tenebras Lux

Chapter Fifty-Six

Ever since their kiss, James had avoided Cassiopeia as though she was contagious. He would hurry out of the common room as soon as he heard her door open and the only time they saw each other was when they were doing their head boy/girl duties. But even then he would say as little as possible to her. Cassiopeia felt incredibly awkward and was unsure about how she was supposed to broach the subject. 

Instead, she devoted her time to studying except now she would make the long walk to the library so she wouldn't have to deal with James.

Cassiopeia was sat with Sirius in the grounds of Hogwarts. The two sunbathed and it was as though the years of distance between the two had never happened as they comfortably joked with each other. 

In the distance, Cassiopeia could see Evans and James laughing together. The firey-haired girl placed her hand on his arm as he smiled down at her. It was an unusual sight as Evans had spent their entire time at Hogwarts telling James to leave her be. Yet there she was willingly spending time with him. Cassiopeia had never cared about James's feelings towards the girl. She hadn't noticed his grand gestures of love to her during their first years at Hogwarts. James had always been the Gryffindor she annoyed but as soon as classes were over she didn't give him a second's thoughts. 

Things had changed though. Now, her blood boiled as she watched the two interact. 

Sirius gave his cousin a knowing look, "You have always been so oblivious to people's affection for you."

Cassiopeia looked away, "What's that supposed?"

"It's as though you have only ever expected hatred so you ignore the signs people like you," Sirius told her, "I know you didn't grow up with love, Cassie, but you need to stop hiding from it."

"I have no idea what you are talking about."

"You are the only person who hasn't noticed that James has stopped his public declarations of love for Lily."

"It looks as though playing hard to get has worked for him."

Sirius laughed, "Stop being so bloody impossible."

"Stop being so absurd."

"I know James kissed you," Sirius looked over at his best friend, "He told us the morning after the party."

Cassiopeia sighed, "Did he tell you about how he immediately ran into his room and has since avoided me. Every time he hears my door open, he hides away in his room. It's ridiculous."

"He thinks you don't like him."

"Why would he think that?"

Sirius looked over at her as he thought about what to say, "You might think you are openly expressing your feelings but you aren't. I understand why. You've grown up having to hide how you feel. You aren't used to being forward. Cassiopeia, love is a foreign emotion for you."

"No, it's not," Cassiopeia whispered, "Both Andromeda and Narcissa show love for me."

"Andromeda left years ago, and Narcissa never showed love for you in front of our family. You may not have realised it but you've been alone for a very long time."

Cassiopeia stared forward, wanting the conversation to end, "You don't know me as well as you like to think, Sirius."

"Yes, I do. Which is why I know James scares you. He scares you because he makes you happy. And you aren't used to being happy."